Aches of the heart, censored version
by Blaquediamond Princess
Summary: Sequel to 'Welcome to the wonderful world of puberty'. 2.5 year have already gone by and life as a couple isn't always as fun as one could tend to believe... further explainations inside. R
1. The tiptoe game

**_Here we go ya'll! The start of a new production by me; the Blackdiamond Princess! _****_The sequel to 'Welcome to the wonderful world of puberty'_**

**_I've been plotting this for a whole time now, and the idea kept getting interesting the more I thought about it. 'Welcome to the wonderful world of puberty' was a good story, I've enjoyed portraying the characters and develop their feelings. It was basically a love story between two boys who grew up together and discovered the difficulties of a homosexual relationship in nowadays' society.  
I want to enter more into the off-side characters (Leon, Cloud & Sephiroth) pasts a little and deepen their characters. This story will be a little darker around the leading characters (Riku&Sora), involving issues of treason, temptation (and rape)... trust will be of importance too, but I want to show what damage it can cause when it's misplaced...  
Over all, I think this fic is going to be more mature in comparison to 'Welcome to the wonderful world of puberty' , with more emotional and difficult subjects... And as I'm always loyal to myself, I will not spare myself and you guys of hot, juicy and steamy yaoi-sex and loving... Although all of that will be censored on this site, you'll be able to read it via the links I'll put in my bio._**  
**_Voilà_****_, I'm all done babbling, I won't make you guys wait any longer. I hope you enjoy. And I demand to receive personal impressions on this! Lol, no just kidding. (It would be nice to have some though)_**

**_Enjoy this._**

**_Blackdiamond Princess!_**

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ONE : The tip-toe game

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**_(And yes, I had to start with a lemon scene right here already. Want to know how it all looked like? Check my bio and you'll get served.)_**

With a stretched out moan Sora fell upon Riku, his breath coming rapidly as he kept his eyes closed and listened to his heart. "Tell me why I can never resist you?"

Riku breathed in deeply and grinned while running a hand through Sora's dampened locks, "Because I'm simply irresistible."

Sora rolled his eyes at that and smiled sleepily at Riku's chuckle, "No, it's because you always lure me into doing it, even though it is—" He turned his head to look at his bedside alarm clock, "1.30 in the morning."

The blonde male laughed heartedly, "And you love every single moment of it, ange. Don't even try to deny it. And in about 3…2…1… You're pouting."

"I'm not!" Sora immediately protested, although he knew he was indeed pouting. His boyfriend's chuckle didn't make it better. "We've been living together for far too long." He looked up and Riku pressed his pursed lips against his pouting ones.

"It's only been two years and a half and you're already tired of me? What happened to 'together for ever'?" Riku said with a grin, letting Sora remove his softening member from his body and watching him wobble his way to their adjoining bathroom. "Don't feel bad because I supply you with mind blowing sex, ange. You should be proud to have a lover like me!"

"Oh shut up," Sora spoke in annoyance as he appeared back in the bathroom's entrance with his night shirt fully buttoned and a damp cloth in his right hand. "You should consider yourself lucky that we're going on vacation tomorrow." He then sighed and closed his eyes and whispered in a sad tone, "You always do this."

Riku frowned slightly and let Sora remove the rest of bodily fluids from his torso, "Do what, ange?" He asked, but received no answer as Sora stood back up and threw the soiled cloth in the laundry bin in the bathroom. "Sora, what's wrong?"

Sora justwaved his question away and re-entered their bed. "Nothing, let's just sleep, alright? I'm tired."

Riku had opened his mouth to ask for another explanation, but Sora had already turned off his light and nestled himself in the covers. With a grunt he just turned himself over then, his back against Sora's. Even after two years and a half of co-habitation there were still a few mood swings of Sora's that he just did not understand. He sighed and just hoped that Sora's sudden bad mood would be over in the morning.

Sora opened his eyes on his side of the bed and sighed silently. A part of him was mad, another was sad. He felt stupid because of his sudden mood swing and because it had caused this uncomfortable climate between them, but he was also mad because his boyfriend hadn't understood the reason behind it. Or was asking for his understanding for this matter maybe too much? Was he overreacting?

Sora sighed again and gripped his pillow tighter, closing his eyes. Hopefully after a night of sleep Riku would've figured it out and it all would be alright. Yeah, there was nothing to worry about.

* * *

The night had caused a chilly air to creep into their room, his body slightly shivering in the silence of a slow winter morning. He sat up and rested his left hand on his neck, feeling the slightly tensed muscles there and rolling his head from side to side in an attempt to relax them. He then laid his sapphire blue eyes on the red duvet and then watched with a loving gaze how the lump lying next to him shifted positions. Last night had ended on asour note, but he wouldn't let it bother this seemingly beautiful morning. 

Turning his head towards the source of light coming from the split in between the curtains, he then smiled as he saw the large flakes of snow falling behind the window. The young man threw his legs out of his bed and bend over, picking up his boxers that were laying at his feet next the bed. He pulled the underwear up his hips, took his night robe that hung over a chair and walked over to the door, leaving his bed mate still asleep in the large bed.

He descended the small stairs leading to the living room/ kitchen and kneeled on the large beige sofa standing underneath the panoramic window and opened the curtains, revealing snow-covered streets. Another smile crossed his figures and he turned around to pick up the remote to the TV standing on a low dresser right from him, turning the device on.

A weather forecast was the first thing he saw and the smile on his lips grew even wider.

Just as he was about to go over to the kitchen at the other side of the room, the wireless phone on the low table in front of him ringed.

"Hello?" He spoke, barely managing to oppress a yawn.

_"Wow… drowsy… Good morning Sora."_

"You and my mum are the only people I know who would call at an unholy hour like this," Sora whispered, muffling another gigantic yawn, "What's up, Cloud?"

_"Just checking to see if the two of you were up already, Leon and I are leaving for Crystel in an hour."_

"That's good, we've already packed, so we won't be long either," Sora replied, now walking over to the small kitchen and opening the fridge. "Seems like we won't have a lack of snow." He commented with one eye on the TV.

_"Yeah, we're lucky… Listen, I'm kind of glad to have you over the phone and not Riku. There's been a slight addition to our plans."_

The brunette frowned slightly, closing the fridge now, the phone stuck in between his right ear and his shoulder, both his hands carrying the milk, butter and eggs he needed for breakfast, "What's wrong?" Why was Cloud happy to have him over the phone rather than Riku?

_"Well, it depends on what you describe as 'wrong'…" _Cloud spoke, _"The thing is that there'll be 7 of us instead of 6."_

"Who's coming along?" He asked, hoping that whoever it was that it wouldn't affect their vacation. Although he knew that there was one person who could…

_"It's Sephiroth."_

Sora bit his lower lip, wincing slightly and putting his items down on the working space. It was no secret that Riku and his elder brother didn't get along. Not in the least…"Oh god…" Sora groaned.

_"I know, but it's also his chalet and he said that he had some business in Crystle so he wants to stay at the chalet while he's needed there."_

Sora sighed, still wanting to be optimistic about the situation, "When is he going to get there? And how long will he be staying?"

_"He told me that he would arrive this evening and probably stay for a week."_

"A week?" Sora exclaimed, putting the spatula down that he had been holding on the working table, "That's half of the time we'll be spending there…" He whispered with a small pout.

_"Yes it is… this isn't going to make a lot of people happy, you know, but he is as much the proprietor of that house as Riku is…"_

Sora sighed again, looking at the eggs now frying in the pan, "True… but this is so not what we needed…" He looked up from the food he was cooking and saw his lover descending the stairs. "Hey Cloud?" He then said into the phone, "Riku's here, so I'll hang up now."

_"Yeah, right.__ Then we'll see you there."_

"Right, later." He hung up and looked up just in time to receive a loving kiss on his lips, "Morning." Sora then whispered with an amorous smile, happy to see Riku acting so affectionate after last night. He dreaded to tell him about what Cloud had told him though… it was sure to jeopardise his boyfriend's good mood permanently.

Riku stretched out and sat himself on one of the stools so he faced Sora, who was now putting the scrambled eggs on a plate. "Morning," He then replied, taking the plate Sora was handing him and putting it on the space in front of him. "What did Cloud want?"

Sora bit his lower lip, turned himself around and took the basket with bread from a counter behind him, "He had some news about our trip."

"By the way you sounded, it wasn't real good news…" Riku said after he had taken a sip from his glass of milk.

Sora turned himself back around and leant with his right hand on the working table while he put the basket with bread in front of his boyfriend with the other. He decided to just tell him what Cloud had told him earlier. "Sephiroth is going to be there too, Riku."

Riku let go of the fork he had picked up to eat his eggs and sighed, "Why?"

Sora bit his lower lip again and then walked over to him; they had already discussed the possibility that Riku's older brother could be spending the winter holidays with them. It didn't really bother Sora, but if Riku didn't feel comfortable, it would be hard for him to enjoy himself. "We talked about this already… please, Riku?" He whispered, laying his arms around his broad shoulders and pressing his right cheek against his left one. "It'll only be for a few days, he said. He has some business in Crystle. We'll still have the rest of our two weeks…"

The blonde sighed and put a hand on Sora's arms embracing him, "That is if you don't get mad at me for some or other reason."

Sora pressed a soft kiss on his left cheek, "I'm sorry baby…" He whispered, closing his eyes, "I guess I was just a little cranky because I was tired. I really want to have some fun with you…" Sora had decided to dismiss all negative feelings that had lingered from last night and just enjoy the time he would be able to spend with his Riku.

Riku turned his face to him and kissed him on his lips again, "You're not mad anymore?" At the shake of Sora's head he smiled, "I don't know for what, but I'm sorry anyways because I made you angry for something I said or did."

"Don't be," Sora whispered back, "I overreacted over nothing. Let's forget about it alright? I want this holidays to be relaxing ones. With you."

Riku knew what Sora was emphasizing on and he had all rights too; he had really been working hard for college lately and for the 'DC-daily', the daily paper of Destiny City where he had a part-time job as columnist.

"I know you've been looking forward to this for a long time…" Riku said, turning his head to face him, "I don't want to mess it up for you too…"

"Thank you," Sora whispered, giving a peck on his nose, "It's going to be fun, you'll see." And with that he let go of him and went over to the cupboards opposite to the small kitchen island and took out his cereals. "Don't let him get to you. He's not worth it."

Riku watched Sora eating his cereals while reading the funnies in the paper, his appetite suddenly gone.

_But he's isn't even near me yet and he's already getting to me…_

* * *

"I think my toes have turned into ice cubes… Fuck, it's cold!" 

Sora watched with an amused grin how Riku struggled to get their luggage up the stairs of the chalet and inside the small hall of the house. He then turned around and looked at the grand space he had just entered.

He stood in the welcoming hall now, a big circular room made mostly out of a beautiful sort of dark wood. On his left were closed double doors and on his right he saw a large living room. Ahead of him were large stairs leading to the first floor and a currently closed double door. Illuminating the whole space was a chandelier made out of deer antlers, the construction leaving Sora mesmerized for a few moments, hoping that the material used was synthetic. He then descended the few stairs towards the luxurious sitting area on his right with large white leather sofa's and an enormous plasma-TV. A flossy white carpet lay underneath the whole area and a golden chandelier hung above it. The huge windows gave sight to the besnowed woods of the domain surrounding the chalet. Sora watched how Riku locked up their car and hurried up the stairs.

"Are we the first ones here?" Riku had entered the living room and was now looking around, checking if everything was still in place.

"Looks like it, though Cloud and Leon left an hour before us." Sora replied, walking over to the blonde and squeezing his right arm in excitement as he passed him by, "Maybe they went into town?" He then said in a louder voice, picking up his backpack and travelling bag from where Riku had left them in the income hall.

"Yeah, could be… at what time did Kairi say they'd be here?"

"They said they'd be here in the evening." Sora responded, stopping in front of the large stairs leading to the above floors and waiting for the other male to pick up his luggage so they could go explore the first floor together.

"That means that there are still 5 of the 6 rooms available." Riku pounced, walking up the first step "Let's go check them out." He wiggled his eyebrows towards his boyfriend before turning back around.

Sora giggled, silently relieved that Riku's bad mood from earlier had seemed to dissolve itself for now. He did realize that not much would be needed to push Riku's buttons now that Sephiroth was going to spend a few days with them.

"Come on, I'm going to show you my room."

"Ah, a bed…" Sora whispered, following Riku up the second set of stairs on his right and giving him a cheeky smile as the blonde turned and chuckled humorlessly at him. "Well, you do have a bed?" He innocently whispered.

Riku rolled his eyes and took Sora's right hand so they could walk up the stairs side by side. Sora nervously smiled at the lack of appreciation for his joke and gave their joined hands an affectionate squeeze, "Please smile?"

A microscopic smile tugged at the right corner of Riku's lips and he sighed as he saw Sora's sad pout.

"Oh baby… I know…" Sora whispered, wishing he could erase Riku's gloomy mood with a simple touch or kiss. He placed his right hand on his boyfriend's left cheek, "But please?"

"Ange…" Riku whispered, turning his head away, 'I'll be fine," He then gave him a grin and a brief kiss on his lips, "Let's go see my room now, alright?"

Sora opened his mouth to protest, but Riku had already reached the top of the stairs. _Why do you need to be so persistent at times…? I only want to help you…!_ He then sighed and climbed the last few steps up the stairs.

"I remember when I was little; my mum taught me how to ice-skate on the lake when it froze over like that." Riku whispered as they were now both looking out of the window of their room on the second floor of the chalet.

Sora watched him from his spot on the windowsill and softly chuckled, "I've never ice-skated before."

"I know, that's why I want to be the one to teach you," Riku whispered, walking over to the king-size bed and sitting himself on it.

Sora scoffed, "You just want to be there when I fall on my behind so you can laugh at me." He then directed his eyes to the large surface of frozen water a few hundred meters from the house.

Riku laughed, "Oh come on, ange…" He then said with a real smile on his face this time, although it didn't predict much good for the spikey haired brunette. Sora hauled his shoulders innocently and then walked over to his boyfriend, who held out his hand to him, "Why do you say something like that for? We're here to have a good time…"

For a moment there, Sora actually thought that Riku had believed what he had just said.

"If your idea of 'fun' implies me falling on my behind, then yeah, YOU'll be the one having fun…" Sora sadly spoke, yet smiling at the thought that it would be great to have Riku smiling - even if it was at his expense- during Sephiroth's stay. He nestled himself in his lap and kissed him softly on his lips.

Riku simply chuckled again and pulled his boyfriend closer to him, "That's not exactly what I envision when I talk about fun… Besides if you hurt your behind, I will be deprived of the fun it provides me, and you know we both can't have that…" He spoke seriously, making Sora laugh heartily. Riku smiled back and kissed his cherub's forehead and caressed one of his chocolate strands out of his sapphire pools. "I don't call you my 'angel' for nothing… How can I possibly have fun out of your pain?"

Sora trailed his eyes away from Riku's and closed his eyes; what he wanted to say now was sure to ruin the mood, but he needed to have it out. "Baby, we need to talk." He whispered, looking back at his lover with apologizing, yet determined eyes.

Aqua eyes squinted suspiciously, "Sure…"

Sora took a deep breath, "Why won't you tell me about you and your brother?" Riku rolled his eyes in an exasperated manner after that sentence, causing Sora to sigh out nervously and grab his face so he'd look at him. "Riku, we're supposed to be a team—"

"We are, and you know I love you." Riku cut him off, pushing Sora off his lap and next to him on the bed so he could stand and walk over to the window.

"You're tip-toeing; avoiding me, right here as I speak…!" Sora said, standing up in turn and walking up to his boyfriend, "Please, whatever troubles you're going through, I want to be there for you." He placed a hand on Riku's left arm that was now folded on the blonde's chest. "Baby?" He whispered worriedly after an uncomfortable moment of silence.

"Why do you have to be like this?" Riku grunted while shaking Sora's hand off his arm. "One moment you're mad and upset with me, the next—"

"I just want to help you!" Sora whispered, his incomprehension at Riku's behavior reflecting itself in his voice. "You've never told me why you and your brother—"

"Sora look," Riku interrupted, his eyes fixed on the besnowed scenery outside the window, "I don't want to talk about it. I'll be fine. Stop worrying."

Sora watched him cross his arms over his chest again and shook his head, "You act all strange and you ask me to pretend nothing is wrong? Baby, you're seriously worrying me. I want to know what is going on…" His voice was nothing but a desperate whisper now; the coldness of Riku's indifference towards his own feelings cutting him like daggers of ice.

Riku turned around to face him with a regretful expression and sighed in remorse as he saw those beautiful pools of blue shimmering with threatening tears. "Sora, ange…"

"Don't 'ange' me, just tell me!" Sora desperately said, "Tell me so I can help you… Why does Sephiroth set you off that much?" Sora placed a hand on his boyfriend's left arm, "What did he do to you?"

Riku averted his eyes and clenched his teeth together; he had hoped that they would make up so it would've been the end of that, but apparently none of that was going to happen. He had made himself clear; he didn't want to talk about his brother, why couldn't Sora just accept that? Why did he have to make such a big deal out of it? "Weren't you the one who wanted to have a stress-free vacation?"

Sora blinked, once again taken aback by his boyfriend's icy tone, "Yeah, but baby—"

"Then stop talking about my brother, alright? I said I didn't want to talk about it!"

With a last glare, Riku then walked towards the door, taking his winter coat from the bed as he went.

Sora let himself fall on the cushioned windowsill and cringed as the door slammed shut. He closed his eyes as he realized that their first vacation day was officially ruined. _This can't possibly get worse…_

**_

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Tell me what ya'll think of it so far? _**

_To be continued…_

**_-BDP-_**


	2. Alternate solace

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Kingdomhearts orthe wonderful characters, they belong to Disney & Squaresoft.

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TWO: Alternate solace

* * *

"Hey Riku—"

"Yeah whatever man."

Cloud jumped out of the way as he nearly got run over by a very pissed off Riku when he arrived on the second floor. _Okay…_ _No need to tell what happened in there… _He glanced back at Riku descending the stairs before entering the room he had been walking to and saw Sora sitting on the windowsill, his head resting against the window as he stared outside, a sad look in his eyes.

With a sigh, Cloud slowly started to walk towards him, knocking on the open door as he went.

Sora turned his head back at the room, hoping to see Riku, but got soon deceived with the sight he received. "Oh, you're here…"

"I'm not going to pretend that you should be happy to see me…" Cloud whispered, taking a few steps further into the room. "Is it safe for me to come in?"

"Yeah… sure…" Sora absentmindedly said, standing up. He then walked over to the dresser that stood left from the bed and started to put his socks and underwear in the top drawer.

"Did you get here long ago?" the blonde spoke cautiously, sitting himself on the other side of the bed.

Sora shook his head briefly and continued his unpacking without saying another word.

Cloud nodded and then scratched the back of his head at the growing awkward silence between them. " Um—I'm sure he'll come around, So—"

"Why didn't you just say 'no', Cloud?" Sora suddenly spoke, taking his suitcase from the bed and putting it in the build in closet on its right side. After he had tucked the suitcase away, he then turned and faced the blonde with an expression stuck between anger and hurt. He knew better than to put all the blame on Cloud, but his anger needed to be directed at something right now and the blonde was just the perfect target.

Cloud didn't answer, but stood up from the bed and looked at Sora, his face expressionless.

The accumulated frustration of not getting his questions answered, started to unnerve Sora, especially since all of his unanswered questions seemed to revolve around the same person.

"What is it you all have with the guy!" He asked in exasperation, "Why doesn't anyone want to tell me what's really going on!"

Cloud sighed and bent his head, while running a hand through his hair, still not answering.

"You don't want to tell me either, is that it?" Sora asked angrily, crossing his arms over his chest.

"That's not it, Sora… It's just that… Do you remember the funeral?" Cloud then spoke softly, his eyes directed to the carpeted floor.

Sora frowned, wondering what that had to do with anything, "Yes, though I don't see what—"

"Name the only person that wasn't present that day." Cloud went on, waiting for Sora to derive a conclusion from what he had just said.

For a few moments Sora just looked at him with a non-understanding face before it suddenly dawned on him; "Sephiroth…?"

Cloud nodded, "Yeah…"

Sora fell silent now, his eyes trailing towards the carpeted floor, "It's strange… I didn't realize until now that I hadn't seen him that day…"

"But Riku did, Sora…" Cloud whispered, looking at him with a calm look on his face. "And that has most certainly not helped to improve their relationship…"

"I shouldn't have pushed him to come…" the brunette remorsefully spoke as the true and more complicated state of the situation became clear. He then walked over to the window and saw Riku making his way to the frozen lake, his steps slow and moderate as he dealt with the thick layer of snow. "Maybe this wasn't a good idea…"

"On the contrary, you did well." Cloud spoke, making Sora turn around and look at him, "Sephiroth wants him here, he wants to talk to his brother and try and reconstruct their broken relationship."

Sora turned back around, regret still written all over his face as he watched his boyfriend sit himself by the lake and lay his head on his knees as he watched over the vast expanse of frozen water. "Why only now? It's almost been half a year since Mrs Takechi died…"

"Things like that take time to heal…" Cloud softly spoke, closing his eyes and sighing softly, "But I think that it's really time for the two of them to start over."

Sora chuckled mockingly at that, his forehead resting against the window-glass as he watched Riku stand up and walk back down the small dirt road leading to the lake and up the main dirt road towards the woods behind the house. "That's going to be hard, if you ask me. Riku can be as stubborn as a mule."

Cloud chuckled behind him, raising his shoulders, "Well, that makes two of them, then. When Sephiroth is out to achieve something, he doesn't stop until he's obtained it."

A smirk formed itself on Sora's plump lips and he stepped away from the window. "Do they really resemble each other that much?" He asked, turning to face Cloud again.

"Next to the physical appearance, yeah… They really do." The blonde whispered with a soft smile on his face.

Sora watched his friend, as he seemed to reminisce about a pleasant memory and raised a skeptic eyebrow. Of course, Cloud's thoughts were none of his business, but there was something about the smile the elder man wore that reminded him of… himself… when he was around Riku.

There was no need to be jumping over to conclusions though; Sora knew that Sephiroth and Cloud used to be lovers. _Seven years ago, if I'm counting it right…_

"So how long have the two of you been together?" Sora asked, deciding to learn more about his boyfriend's brother, since no one else wanted to enlighten him on the subject.

"Sephiroth and me?"

Sora nodded, "Yeah, Riku told me once that you two used to be together."

Cloud chuckled briefly before clearing his throat and taking seat in one of the chairs next to the window. "We've never been officially together… And it was more of a love-hate relationship; we only got together when we were both in the mood to see one and other." He whispered with that reminiscing stare still on his face. "Sephiroth was, and I bet he still is, a very complex man… and I was a very insecure boy searching for security."

Sora smiled amenably, "Kind of dysfunctional…"

The blonde man chuckled and gave a semi-nod, "I first met him at DI- high, ten years ago, when our family moved to Destiny Island. He was this popular, straight 'A' senior and I was a new upperclassman who wanted to make friends and just get through his last years of high school. Alive."

Sora chuckled briefly, "Did you know then that you were gay?"

"I had never really manifested an interest in girls, but I just thought that at that age I still had plenty of time…" Cloud thoughtfully whispered.

"When did you find out then?" Sora further inquired.

"Sephiroth approached me one day at school, something I had never thought he would do, since I wasn't really the popular type… and he sort of took me under his wing for a couple of months. When I asked him why he did what he did, he said, and I remember every word; _'Is it a crime to long for someone's body so badly that you just want to claim them as your own? Or is it okay with you and can we just cut to the chase and stop this dance of seduction?'_" Cloud chuckled again and shook his head. "It was when he kissed me for the first time that I came to realize my secret attraction towards him and with that that I had a sexual preference for males." The blonde said with a small smile.

"He seems like a straightforward guy…" Sora softly whispered, noticing that Riku differed in that point from his brother at the moment. "Did you love him?" he then asked softly as he saw that affectionate expression on his friend's face again.

Cloud smirked slightly and fell silent for a while. He then looked at Sora and brought back that reminiscing smile, "I did…" He whispered, his eyes now moving away from the brunette's and staring at nothing in particular. "Even though we had more arguments than anything, I was always falling back in love with him when I saw him. I guess that's what made the sex so good."

Sora chuckled at that, his cheeks slightly blushing, "Fights indeed make the sex better…"

Cloud raised an eyebrow at that; the hint of a grin on his lips. "You're the best person to know that, aren't you?" He said and chuckled as he saw Sora grin sheepishly, "But they are also needed to fortify a relationship. They are the signs that shows that a relationship is healthy. That is, if they happen just now and then."

Sora nodded in understanding and smiled softly, his thoughts drifting towards his last heated discussion with his boyfriend. "I know, but lately I've been feeling like I need to hide myself to avoid confrontations with him. And when I do confront him, he distances himself from me." He sighed and closed his eyes, "I just… I don't want to lose him… I don't know what to do."

"Give him time," Cloud whispered.

Sora looked at him and Cloud turned his face to meet his questioning gaze, "But…"

"Just give him time…" He repeated. "When he'll feel ready to tell you about whatever is bothering him, he will. Forcing him to tell you won't help."

Biting his lip nervously, the brunette stood up and took a few steps through the room, "It's just… I don't understand; I thought he trusted me. Why didn't he tell me before?" Sora spoke, looking at a painting of a forest in the fall. "If he had, then we wouldn't be in this mess…"

"Sometimes," Cloud stood up in turn and came to stand next to him, "sometimes it's not up to the couple to solve an individual problem…"

"You mean that he maybe needs to solve this on his own?" Sora asked, turning himself to face his friend with a doubtful stare.

"Could be," Cloud whispered back, putting his hands in his pockets and closing his eyes. "You trust Riku more than anything, right?"

Sora nodded without a second thought.

"Then, you trust him to find his way back to you, like he trusts that you will come to understand how he feels." Cloud whispered, his eyes looking at the painting now.

"But it's just hard to see him hurting like that and not being able to help…" Sora whispered sadly, walking back to the window and resting a hand on the glass.

"I know…" Cloud spoke and closed his eyes. He then sighed and threw his head back so he was looking at the ceiling, "When Rinoa, Leon's ex-girlfriend, died, he distanced himself from me too…"

Sora frowned and turned around to face his friend with an apologizing expression, "I'm sorry…"

"She had killed herself," Cloud continued, bringing his head back on Sora's eyelevel, "And Leon blamed himself for her death."

"Why?" Sora questioned softly.

"Because he left her for me," The blonde whispered softly. "The more I tried to get through to him, the more he slipped away from me. We were this close to actually break up. I finally realized that he just needed some time to move on."

A moment of silence came in between them until Sora raised his head and looked at his friend. "I understand now…" He softly said, "I need to let him go so I don't lose him…"

Cloud nodded and gave him a small smile, "Just don't ever doubt about the fact that he'll be back."

The younger male smiled back at him, "Thank you so much, Cloud." He walked over to him and embraced him, "I just don't know what I would've done without you."

Cloud hugged him back and then let go, "It's okay, Sora. Anytime."

With a smile Sora walked away from him and exited.

A worried expression came over Cloud's face however when he found himself alone in the room. He too dreaded the arrival of Sephiroth, but for different reasons. Just a few moments ago, as he was walking down memory lane, he had discovered that a piece of his heart still belonged to those days when he used to call Sephiroth his…

A part of him was afraid of the feelings he still felt for the man and another part couldn't wait to see his ex again. No need to tell that he felt awfully guilty towards Leon, but no matter how much he tried to fight it, turn it around and look at it from a different angle, the undeniable fact was that he still had sentiments, whatever they were, for Sephiroth.

* * *

"Hey you…"

The snow creaked underneath his footsteps as he approached the blonde sitting on a trunk of a fallen tree in the middle of the forest.

Riku turned his head and looked at Sora standing there a few meters from him, his head covered the furred cap of his white winter coat and his feet wearing matching, cute white furred boots over his sky blue jeans. "How did you find me?"

"I followed you," Sora whispered back, approaching his boyfriend cautiously. "I saw you go this way through the window… A black coat quickly stands out in a white scenery anyway…"

"You could have got lost yourself," Riku whispered, raising his head up to the grey sky and watching how it started to snow again. He then turned his head to him, thinking of how Sora's tropical nature wasn't accustomed to the bitter winters on the vast land. "You better go back; you'll catch a cold. Or worse."

A small smile crept up the younger one's lips at those caring words, but he still sat himself next to him on the trunk. "Then we'll catch a cold together. Or worse."

Riku smiled, knowing that it would be more likely for his boyfriend to get sick than him, seen the fact that he was used to spending his winter holidays in Crystle. Even though the thought behind the words he uttered was comforting, he still couldn't have Sora getting sick. "Sora—"

"I know," The brunette interrupted him, putting gloved right hand fingertips on his lips so to silence him and shaking his head. "I just wanted to be with you; you know how much I can't stand our arguments…"

Riku took the fingers pressing against his lips in his right hand and kissed them softly, closing his eyes. He too hated the way they argued at times and he just couldn't stand the idea of losing Sora… He just… he just needed more time… more time to sort out his thoughts on what he was keeping secret.

"You don't need to tell me about it anymore. I don't need to know." Sora suddenly whispered, scooting closer and taking Riku's right hand in his left one, "All I need is for you to love me, that's all I really want." He laid his forehead on the blonde's left shoulder and closed his eyes.

Riku moved his right arm around Sora and looked up at the skies again, a sad look coming on his face. Ever since they moved away together, Sora would always be the first one to crawl back from a dispute, always giving into whatever Riku wanted… and now, he had just done it again and it made him feel worse.

"I love you. I know that no matter how much we fight, you'll never hurt me intentionally…" Sora whispered against the black fabric of Riku's coat, his breath coming in white clouds. "I trust you with my life."

A small sigh escaped the elder's mouth at those words. So basically what Sora just said was that he'd accept whatever decision Riku would make, as long as it didn't keep him from being happy with Sora. Yet, that wasn't what he wanted… he wanted, needed Sora to be happy with him too, not yield to whatever he'd say to avoid a fight. He wanted to tell Sora about Sephiroth and him, but it was the pain within that withheld him from telling his ignorant boyfriend from his past with his brother.

"Sora, I want you to remember something." He whispered instead, sniffling slightly and standing up.

"Okay," Sora whispered back, taking the hand Riku was offering him to stand up with. He was taken into an intimate embrace as soon as he got up, Riku's soft baritone whispering in his ear.

"No matter how much we fight, I don't want you to suffer because of it… I don't want you to be submissive… not in that area." He smiled, endeared at the brunette's shy giggle, "Compromises will have to be made at times, but don't ever forget that you are a part of this couple too and that your vision on things counts as much as mine."

Sora nodded, understanding what Riku was saying. He didn't want him to give up his free will to please him. Still, this wasn't what he was doing right now. "I understand, but I know that I can't force you into telling me what happened between you and Sephiroth, so I would like to leave it at that."

Riku nodded and tightened his hold on him. "I will tell you soon, Sora. I just need more time…"

Sora nodded comprehensively again and stroked the back of Riku's head with his right hand, "I understand…" He then felt the blonde loosening his grip on him and he took a step back, holding his hand out to him. "Let's head back then, alright?"

Riku took the hand offered and pulled him next to him by his left hip and they walked side by side back down the besnowed path towards the chalet.

* * *

"If you keep this up, we'll never get to dinner!"

Sora bend over the kitchen's worktable as Riku nibbled on his right ear again. "Stop!" He giggled, making sure that he didn't cut his fingers while chopping the onions for the soup he was making.

"I'm just trying to help…" The blonde murmured back against his neck, taking hold of Sora's hands and guiding them away from the half-chopped vegetable.

"How's that?" Sora chuckled as he got turned around and faced his boyfriend with a playful glare.

"I'm building up your appetite for dinner…" Riku answered back, coaxing the hands he still held captive around his neck and sliding his own hands down the smaller male's sides. He then picked him up by his hips and put him on the table, pushing the chipped onion and knife at a safe distance.

"I doubt that you're referring to the same meal as I am…" Sora whispered with a small impish smile, looking upon him, "Can't you wait until after dinner?" A simple headshake was his answer before smooth lips took possession of his in a fiery kiss, his legs parting themselves in invitation.

Riku moved closer, his hands creeping up Sora's thighs until they slid underneath his white sweater. "No, I want desert now."

The next thing Sora knew was that he lay sprawled out on the kitchen island with Riku on top of him, nibbling, licking and sucking on the skin of his throat mercilessly.

"Ri-ku…!"

"I told you we shouldn't have got entrusted them with dinner." Leon remarked from above his magazine as he sat on the right couch in the lounge room. "At this rate we'll end up eating after midnight."

Cloud absently smiled at his lover's words, his mind floating elsewhere for the time being.

Leon briefly glanced up from what he was reading, finding Cloud curled up in a corner of the couch opposite from him, his face directed to the TV, but his eyes staring blankly at a spot next to the device. "What are you thinking about?"

For a moment Cloud didn't respond, not registering that he had been asked a question. "I'm sorry love, what did you say?" He then whispered, turning his head slowly to Leon, his voice sounding dreamy and far-off.

"What's on your mind?" Leon asked again, standing up this time and sitting himself behind Cloud, taking him in his arms.

Cloud didn't directly respond, but just held on to the hands encircling him and laid the back of his head against a firm and welcoming shoulder. "Sephiroth."

Leon delicately brushed a stray blonde lock out of his lover's face, telling him that he was listening and waiting for an elaboration of his statement. The relationship he and Cloud build had evolved itself in an almost wordless one; not much needed to be said anymore, they knew each other through and through after almost 7 years. And so, no doubtful thoughts rose to his mind as he heard Cloud speak out the name of his former lover. "Do you still think he's going to be a problem?"

"I don't know…"Cloud softly said, intertwining his left hand with Leon's right one, "I surely don't hope so…"

"Then tell me what is bothering you." Leon gently spoke, his deep voice holding evidence of genuine concern.

Cloud hesitated for a moment before turning himself around on the couch to face him, "He's my ex, Leon." Cloud reminded him.

"I don't have a problem with it." The elder brunette replied simply.

Cloud averted his eyes then, "I wish you did." He said in a small voice.

"Why?" Leon asked, coaxing him to look at him, "I'm not the baby sitting type, you know that."

Cloud nodded and sighed, "What if—"

"No." Leon stated, taking hold of Cloud's head with both hands, "That's up to you." And with that he kissed his forehead, took the magazine he had been reading earlier and walked out of the living room and up the stairs.

Guilt washed over him again as he found himself alone in the large room. Cloud maybe hadn't told his companion openly about his feelings for Sephiroth, but Leon had understood and given him the freedom of doing as he pleased… Cloud knew that Leon was upset about his unspoken feelings for Riku's elder brother, but it wasn't even the knowledge of it that made him feel bad, it was the way the elder brunette acted; he acted like he didn't care and that was making him feel even worse than if his lover had taken the time to yell at him.

Even though he felt remorse and guilt for the feelings he felt, he still couldn't shake them, making him wonder if he would be able to hide them once Sephiroth would be here…

* * *

"So what did Kairi say?"

All four of them were now sitting in the living room, relaxing to soft music now that dinner was over.

Sora was sitting on the right couch opposite to Leon and Cloud, Riku was resting with his head on his boyfriend's lap, lazily lying on the couch as he listened to the music and enjoyed the small hands running through his hair.

Cloud clapped his cell phone closed and sighed in discontent, "All roads to Crystle are closed for the night, due to the heavy snow. They are stuck in DC for the night and will be here in the morning."

"Oww…" Sora pouted unhappily and bent his head, "I was really looking forward to see her tonight."

"You'll see her in the morning, ange." Riku softly whispered up to him with a comforting smile, "And knowing her, she'll convince Wakka to hit the road as soon as the sun comes up."

Sora giggled at that and traced his right hand finger over the bridge of the other male's nose, "I'm happy to see you so relaxed, baby." He whispered softly.

"Me too, because it makes you happy." Riku replied with a smile and reaching for Sora's neck so he would bend over for a chaste kiss.

"You know, I still owe you an apology for my stupid behaviour from last night." The brunette spoke with an impish smile. "I was really, REALLY being stupid."

Riku returned the smile, getting where his mischievous little boyfriend was going. "But I thought we decided to forget all about it this morning?"

"Yeah," Sora nodded truthfully, his eyes shyly looking at him. "But I really want to get punished for it."

"Oh really?" Riku murmured with his smile still on his face.

"Yes."

"Then tell me, what kind of punishment do you desire I give you?"

Their conversation had turned into an almost inaudible whisper now, their cunning giggles and chuckles telling the other couple enough on the topic.

"It is not a matter that is properly discussed in here; in the midst of onlookers."

Riku laughed heartedly before standing up and walking towards the now closed doors of the lounge, "Then we shall continue our conversation upstairs, in the privacy of our room, my dear."

Cloud chuckled briefly before shaking his head amusedly and picking up the remote for the TV.

Sora immediately jumped up, walked over to Riku and jumped on his back as the doors opened, giggling, 'Goodnight' as his boyfriend carried him up the stairs.

"Please tell me their room is not next to ours?" Leon calmly spoke, not looking up from the book he was reading.

Cloud laughed at that. It actually was.

**

* * *

I promise that there'll be a lemon in the next chap!**

_To be continued…_

**_-BDP-_**


	3. Sparks in the dark

**_Gah! It took me so much time to write this, I really really hope it came out alright…_**

**_Special thanks goes_** **_out to my angel, Gabriel. Sweetie, if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have got know what to do with this chap._**

_**As promised, I've put the lemon in it, so you better be showing me some love after reading this too… Lol**_

**_Fanfiction . net readers:The main lemon has been cut out from this chap, check my bio for the full, uncensored version) _**

* * *

THREE: Sparks in the dark

* * *

After approximately an hour, Leon closed his book and stood up, announcing that he was going to bed.  
"Alright," Cloud whispered, "I'll be right up." looking up at him from his spot on the couch. As Leon bent over to kiss him goodnight on his lips, he could feel his heart break with the weight of what he was putting his lover through… Leon walked away and he could feel his eyes resting on him, but he just couldn't muster the strength to look at him for fear of seeing the expression on his face.  
The door to their room fell shut in the distance and Cloud sighed, pulling his legs up his body and resting his head on his drawn up knees. He wanted to go and join him in bed and yet he didn't… He couldn't command his body to go rest by Leon's side.  
He probably had been sitting like that for five minutes when he suddenly heard the front door slam shut and the glass doors to the hall open themselves. Footsteps followed on the polished wooden floor and he felt his heart race, a cold sweat running down his back as he recognized the voice speaking to him in that grave, husky tone.  
"Good evening, Cloud."  
Swallowing hard and raising his head up slowly to look at the elder man standing a few meters from him, Cloud gasped softly as he came to face him. "Sephiroth."  
There he stood; tall, intimidating and oh-so good looking in his long black coat and black business suit, his long strands of silver hanging freely over his shoulders, a few flakes of snow lying on them. "Has everyone gone to bed?"  
Cloud nodded, as he laid his feet back on the floor and stood up, feeling even more uncomfortable now that he was standing while Sephiroth seemed to examine him with those piercing jade eyes of his.  
Sephiroth nodded in turn, a hint of a smile on his lips, "Good. Has everyone arrived?" He asked. "I heard that many roads to Crystle have been closed tonight."  
Cloud halted in the steps he had wanted to take to move himself towards the stairs and turned to face him again, his heart pounding like crazy in his chest. _Just relax…_ "No, only my sister and her boyfriend aren't here. They will arrive in the morning." He said and watched Sephiroth nodding comprehensively while walking to the couch Sora and Riku had been sitting on earlier and sitting himself on it with a tired sigh.  
"So, Riku has come too?" He asked, his head resting against the couch while he looked at Cloud standing by the stairs.  
Cloud nodded, knowing that Sephiroth was trying to keep him from going up the stairs, "Yes." He softly said, watching how the other man sighed and closed his eyes. There was an uncomfortable silence between them and Cloud could tell that Sephiroth had a lot of things on his mind, his brother being one of them.  
The elder man then smiled and sat back, loosening the knot of his silver tie. "Did he bring someone with him?" he asked.  
Cloud nodded again, sensing something of a strange vibe coming from the other man. It felt like... regret… Sephiroth Makoto having regrets about something? It couldn't be... "He's with Sora." Cloud simply stated.  
A thoughtful expression came upon his face, "Sora… Sora… that kid that lived a few houses away from us?"  
Cloud nodded once again, smiling softly. "Yes. They are together now."  
Sephiroth then had a surprised look on his face. "Together?" he asked, "Like when we were...?"

Cloud reluctantly nodded at Sephiroth's inquiry.  
Sephiroth then resumed his cool attitude, "Never thought that little bro would turn out to be that way."  
Cloud chuckled, "You make it sound as if it's a bad thing." He crossed his arms over his chest questioningly and frowned slightly.  
Sephiroth chuckled back, "I'm just surprised. Besides, you of all people have known me long enough to know where my preferences lie."  
The blonde smiled amenably, rested his hands on his hips and bent his head; he had caught the strange longing gaze the elder man had cast him. "Well, it definitely shows how little you know about your own brother."  
"Still as feisty as ever, aren't we, Cloud?" Sephiroth snickered, acknowledging Cloud's valid point.  
Cloud set aside the remark, refusing to involve himself in his mind-games, "You do realize that these are supposed to be pleasurable holidays for everyone, don't you?"  
Sephiroth's gaze grew ice cold for a brief moment before he smirked, "Well I can't possibly ask you to leave without upsetting my little brother, now can I?"  
Cloud averted his eyes and chewed on the insides of his cheeks to avoid saying something that would certainly fuel up their discussion. This was Sephiroth's house also and he could do whatever he pleased with it, everyone else was a guest. Yet he refused flatly to apologize; he had been right. Sephiroth could be a real asshole when he wanted to.  
"Of course I know that everyone wants to enjoy themselves, Cloud." The silver haired man then whispered almost annoyed. "There is only one purpose for why I am here; I told you so over the phone."  
Cloud sighed, feeling annoyed as well now, "Sephiroth—"  
"It's been seven years, Cloud."  
"I know." He whispered back and looked away again, the uneasiness from before coming back. "And that's exactly what—"  
Sephiroth stood up and walked up to him with a few long strides, towering above him as he came to a halt right in front of him. "What the problem is?"  
"Why are you doing this to me?" Cloud pleadingly whispered, moving his face away from Sephiroth's caressing hand on his cheek. "You're the one who betrayed me, remember?"  
Sephiroth gently put the fingertips of his right hand on Cloud's chin, turning his face back to his and pressed his lips against his. When he pulled back from the unanswered kiss, big tears were rolling down Cloud's face and his eyes were full of held back anger.  
"It took me way too much time to get over you, Sephiroth." He shakily whispered, his lips trembling as he spoke, "Don't make me go through it again." With that he turned around and ran up the stairs, leaving the other man on his own in the hall.

_

* * *

Meanwhile... _

"That tickles!"  
Sora giggled as Riku pressed his lips against his stomach underneath his sweatshirt and blew hard. He pulled the hem of the clothing garment over the blonde's head and giggled some more as Riku grabbed him tighter and mumbled something about letting him go so he could breathe.  
"Why did you have to get down there anyway?" Sora chuckled, still holding a firm grip on his sweatshirt.  
"Mm-o-waa! Let me out!"  
"No! No-ahhh!" Sora suddenly found himself hauled over his boyfriend left shoulder and carried over to the bed. "No fair!"  
"All is fair in love and war, my dear." Riku breathed, his face still a little flushed by his forced captivity underneath Sora's warm sweatshirt. "There is no escape for you."  
"Gah!" Sora exclaimed as he fell on the bed and Riku jumped on top of him. "What are you going to do to me?" He then innocently asked, acting frightened.

"To you, my beautiful prey, I'm going to show the sinful pleasures of the flesh. The passionate heat of the Art, the Art of Making Love, the never-ending, erotic satisfaction that only I can procure you."  
"Ok. "Sora giggled, "Now you over did it."  
"Really?" the blonde asked while a mischievous look appeared on his face, "So then, let's get to it." Riku impatiently chuckled, taking off his turtle neck sweater and carelessly throwing it somewhere behind him.  
"Why are we so hasty?" Sora asked, sitting up and keeping him from taking off the shirt he wore underneath, "Let's go slow…" He pressed a soft kiss to his lips, "Let's make it never-ending…"

"Slow?" Riku snickered, "You mean start slow, because we both know you tend to get a little 'impatient' near the end."

Sora smiled admittedly, "True… but everything has been so hectic lately… we hardly took the time to slow down a bit, get back to basics."

Riku smiled and held his forehead pressed against Sora's, looking into those honest pools of blue. He nodded then, it was true that their lives were one big hectic mess with their work, school and social activities, and that they hardly took the time to take things slow, even in bed. The time they had taken to blow off some steam from the big city life was now and Sora was right to want to make good use of it.

Their lips met in a first sweet kiss, Riku's hands sliding up into Sora's hair and pulling him closer. Small hands crawled in between them and slid underneath the white fabric of Riku's undershirt, carefully paying attention to every muscular curve underneath, caressing their way up while dragging the piece of clothing along until passing it over the silver haired one's head and throwing it aside. Those same hands then went to rest on the two well-shaped pecs of his lover, soft lips following the same path the hands took just moments before.

Sora's eyes slid upwards to Riku's face when he felt a soft hand pressing against the back of his head, urging him to look up. "Am I going too slow…?"

Riku simply watched him with his aqua orbs and didn't answer. He then gave him a dark smile and pulled him up, "Do what you think is good, don't act out on what you think I'll like."

"I want you to enjoy this…"

"What makes you think that I'm not?" Riku murmured, his eyes looking at his kiss-swollen lips. He chuckled briefly when he saw his boyfriend shyly blushing and made him look at him again with a soft caress of his right index finger on his left cheek.

"I don't know…" Sora whispered, moving his head into the direction of the touch and closing his eyes. "I just don't want our lovemaking to become too repetitive… I want to please you so badly…"

"Ange, you'll always please me, no matter what we do in bed."

Sora smiled softly, taking hold of Riku's hand against his face, "Then you won't mind me doing a little strip right now?" he whispered, looking at him tenderly.

"Okay, are you sure you need an answer to that?" Riku chuckled, letting go of him and watching him get off the bed.

Sora giggled and shook his head cutely as he stood there next to the bed, his hands held against his mouth nervously.

Riku moved to lie himself on his side on the bed so he could watch the little show. "I wonder how you'll make me go slow on you after this, but I'm willing to see what'll happen."

Sora stuck out his tongue to him and began swaying his hips seductively while he turned around. He closed his eyes at the feeling of Riku's longing gaze on him; it was making him feel so wanted and naked… a combination he knew proved itself to be so arousing…

"I would've unpacked my portable stereo, but seen the late hour…" Sora whispered with one eye over his shoulder and a small smile as he loosened his jean one button at the time, making small throaty noises with each opened button.

Riku was moving his head to the swinging hips and licking his lips with each sound his boyfriend made. "What song would you have put on?"

Sora impishly smiled and let the jeans fall around his feet and stepped out of them, purposely not looking at Riku and bending over with the bed on his left side so his boyfriend could watch every curve of his body slowly coming up. "Does it matter, as long as we make our own music?"

"You're going to end up making me want to touch myself, ange…" Riku whispered, his eyes fixed on Sora's slender legs, sliding up his thighs and halting on the beautiful rounding of his still clothed buttocks that went slightly hidden behind his white sweatshirt.

"I wouldn't want you to cum without me, baby…" He softly whispered and walked back over to the bed and crawled on it on hands and knees, slowly approaching Riku from his toes. "You know how much I love your sweet juices…"

A silver eyebrow rose in silent approval of those words while Sora crept further, making his way up his body and already reaching his waist.

"I left a mark here from last time…" The brunette throatily whispered, looking at the bite mark near Riku's navel.

Riku chuckled, "It's not the only one…"

Sora smiled and traced a finger over the reddened skin, "One must mark his property clearly in order to not have it stolen…"

"Now I'm property?" Riku chuckled, moving to lean on his elbow so he could see what Sora was doing.

"Yes, you are, do you have problem with that?" Sora said as-a-matter-of-factedly, shaking his head with attitude.

Riku chuckled and shook his head, "Nope, none whatsoever, babe. Carry on."

A soft giggle was Sora's reply and he continued his journey over the tight, flat planes of Riku's abdomen and up the slightly rising plateaus of his chest and the erected buds of his nipples before stopping for a few licks in the hollow at the base of his throat.

Riku threw his head back at this, lowering himself back on the cushions and emitting a soft growl at the small licks in his throat and on his jaw line. "Babe…"

"Hmm…?"

"Take that sweater off… NOW."

Sora chuckled and let go of him, sat up and put his arms crossed over his chest so he could take his sweatshirt and the t-shirt he wore underneath off in one fluid motion, leaving him in nothing else but his dark blue close fitting shorts. "Better…?"

The elder one nodded, his hands taking hold of his hips eagerly.

"Me on top…" Sora whispered, taking Riku's hands in his and lying them flatly on his chest, "You like that, don't you?" He wiggled his hips slightly and grinded himself against Riku's rampant erection.

"Actually," Riku said and rolled him over without warning, making the younger one gasp in surprise at the hands that had already taken possession of his wrists to pin them down beside his head. "No, I prefer you beneath me on the bed, lying there, writhing passionately under my body, moaning uncontrollably and louder each time I hit your core over and over again… Your searing body arching, sobbing and whimpering my name until we both explode in each other's arms, my body giving you the essence of my love, your body tightly wrapped around me…"

Sora smiled as Riku buried his face in his throat, his fingers sliding in between his, intertwining them. "Baby…" He moaned, feeling him slowly moving his hips in between his legs, adding friction on the right spot.

"Every time we make love it is beautiful, ange… Whether we go slow or do it fast; it'll never lose in beauty to me."

Sora's shining eyes found his serious sea-green ones and they kissed, their tongues starting an erotic dance inside their mouths. He felt Riku deepen the kiss, making him whimper and wrapping his legs around his waist, his now opened hands still captured underneath Riku's.

A soundless moan escaped him as he broke the kiss for air, Riku's still clothed groin pressing against his, making him grow more and more impatient with every passing second. "Riku… oh…"

Riku then smiled, hearing the small impatient note in his voice and pressed a last kiss at the base of Sora's throat, got up from the bed and headed away from the brunette's sight.

"Baby!" Sora protested with a pout on his face, hitting his fists on the mattress on either side of his body in frustration.

"Hold on..." Was all that answered Sora's small yet powerful protest.

Sora groaned and sat up in annoyance, "What the fuck is he planning?"

Smooth music suddenly started to flow out of the wall-mounted speakers, making the restless youth go silent.

"I'm planning to make it never-ending..." Riku answered as he appeared out of nowhere. "And, to do that, we can't disturb the other guests, now can we?" Riku coolly said. "Therefore, we need to have something to drown out your powerful moans babe..."

Sora gasped as he saw Riku walking up naked to the bed, his cream-toned body moving majestically as he got down on hands and knees, crawling up to him to the rhythm of the music.

His head felt all fuzzy as he laid back down, his body tingling all over from the small jolts of electricity that seemed to flow through him. "You never told me you had a stereo-installation in here…"

"You never asked," Was his simple reply before his lips took possession of his lover's lips again with a deep, searing kiss.

Sora gasped when he felt Riku's naked erection pressing against the thin fabric of his shorts, "Mhh… baby…"

Riku chuckled softly and nuzzled Sora's throat lovingly, leaving soft kisses as he made his way down his body.

Sora closed his eyes and bit his lip in anticipation as Riku reached his navel and dipped his tongue in it.

Riku watched how the lean muscles underneath his boyfriend's skin contracted at the contact and savored Sora's held back moan. "Your body…" he whispered, his right hand sliding down his side and his fingers curling around the hem of his short, pulling the undergarment down, "Still as responsive and arousing…"

Revealing the hairless, soft skin underneath, Riku moved to press a kiss there while pulling Sora's boxer's completely away.

Sora raised his hips off the bed to facilitate the removal of his underwear, an expectant smile on his face.

"You shaved it."

"I love it better this way, don't you?"

Riku snickered, "I do too."

A hand slid through Riku's platinum mane and Sora tenderly smiled, taking a pink tube from underneath his pillow, "Would you mind skipping the rest of the foreplay, baby?"

**_(For the pervs: go check my bio for the uncensored smut)_**

"That was great, baby…" Sora gleefully whispered, absentmindedly caressing Riku's hair.

Riku pressed another kiss in the crook of his left shoulder, "I feel like we reconnected again…"

Sora rubbed the left side of his head against his and smiled, "I feel so too, we really needed it."

"True…"

Sora then turned his head to look at the right bedside clock and read 10.26 pm, "I'm thirsty."

Riku chuckled softly and nodded, "Alright," He then carefully removed himself from Sora before rolling over on the other side of the bed.

The brunette quickly got off the bed and went to the adjoining bathroom at the other side of the room as quickly as he could with his legs firmly pressed against one and other.

Riku snickered at that, took hold of his pillow and rested his head on it as he watched him return in his black bathrobe that was two sizes too big for him, "Do you need anything?"

"Nope, I'm fine." Riku replied, getting off the bed as well and stretching out lazily in his naked glory. "Don't be too long…"

Sora giggled and walked back to him to apply an amorous kiss on his lips and a loving caress on his butt, "I'll be right back."

And with that he walked away from and opened the door to exit.

* * *

He opened the door to their room and rested his back against it as he closed it, sighing deeply. As his right hand moved to turn the lights on, he felt another one moving to cup his face. 

"Leon…?" He whispered before his lips got captured into a passionate kiss and another hand moved in between them, unbuttoning and unzipping his pants.

"Just leave the lights off…" Leon's husky voice whispered against his skin, his lips now sliding down his throat, nipping at the sensitive skin as they went.

"Leon…" Cloud softly protested, not feeling at ease with what happened just moments before downstairs.

A low mumble was all Cloud received as answer, his shirt soon falling on a puddle next to his pants on the floor and the unease slowly subsiding.

"Ah!" The blonde moaned as he was harshly pushed against the door and lifted up so he could wrap his legs around his lover's waist. He could feel the throbbing member of his lover pressing against him, making his body tremble all over in anticipation.

"Le…on…!" Cloud managed as Leon's manhood made his brusque entrance and all air left his lungs.

The many years spent with Leon had told him that though the brunette did not talk much, he mostly let his actions talk for themselves. He could feel tears in his eyes as he realized that this was Leon's way of asking him not to leave, his way of showing him that he did wanted them to be together.

He held him tighter to his body, letting his tears run freely over his face as the feelings of remorse took over again and his heart felt torn. He loved Leon, God knows how much he did… but he was afraid. If only he didn't feel the way he did for Sephiroth, then all of this wouldn't be necessary… If only Sephiroth would just let their story rest where they left it, then all of this…

"Cloud… I love you…" He heard Leon whisper in his right ear.

This made him break down in sobs, his body shaking, partly from the increasing thrusts and partly from his tears. "I love you too, so much, Leon…"

Not a hair on Leon's head doubted about the sincerity of those words, though he just wished that he could get a hold of what was going through his partner's mind at that time…

_

* * *

To be continued… _

_**-BDP-**_


	4. Broken silence

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* * *

FOUR : Broken silence

* * *

Sora descended the last wooden steps of the stairs leading into the welcoming hall and turned to his left to enter the dining room. From there he turned to his left again to walk over to the kitchen, when he heard the keys of a piano playing nearby. 

Following the sound to the door at the outmost right of the room, he halted with his hand on the knob, wondering who it could be playing such a beautiful tune.

He opened the door slowly and peeked inside.

Bathing in the light of the full moon shining through the large windows sat a long white haired man behind a white piano that Sora recognised immediately. His fingers flew across the keys virtuously, the sound beautiful, yet melancholic at the same time.

Sora watched him for a while, the melody striking him deeply for some reason, the evoked emotions threatening to bring him to tears as the song reached its melodic peak.

Sephiroth sighed as he played the last note, opening his eyes when he felt another presence in the room. He calmly turned his head to look at the person standing by the door and couldn't help the small smile that passed his features. "Good evening, Sora." He whispered, recognising the small brunette, "It's been a while."

"That was beautiful…" Sora whispered with a small smile.

Sephiroth smiled again and looked back at the piano, "It has been a long time since I played though. Thank you."

The brunette smiled back, "Did you arrive long ago?"

"An hour or so." Sephiroth said, closing the key case. "Did I wake you?"

"Oh! No, I wasn't sleeping yet." Sora whispered with a blush on his face, making the other man chuckle in understanding. "I just came down for a drink."

Sephiroth nodded and stood, "Then I won't keep Riku waiting for you."

Sora just watched him pass by and couldn't help but feel sorry for Sephiroth for some reason. It didn't look like he had the same harsh feelings for his brother like Riku had for him, making him wonder what it actually was that had happened once again.

"It's good to see you, Sora. You look good." The elder man said with a brotherly smile, ruffling Sora's hair briefly. He then exited and left the youth in the dark, large room.

Sora exited too and watched with a slight frown how Sephiroth walked up the stairs. Maybe he would tell him what it was that bothered Riku so much… He shook the idea out of his head though; Riku told him he'd tell him, so there was no need to go ask someone else.

Still, as Sora walked up the stairs with a bottle of water 2 minutes later, he wondered whether Riku should be told of his brother's presence in the house tonight. He decided that he preferred keeping the peace between them and that if Riku wanted to get angry, he could do that in the morning.

* * *

"You've got to be kidding me!" 

Sora shook his head as he laid the last touch to the Christmas tree in the lounge. "I saw him last night. He's here."

Kairi blinked a few times at him as she came to him with two mugs of hot chocolate. "What did Riku say? Did they see each other?"

Sora turned around and accepted the mug she held out for him and shook his head, "Sephiroth had to work today and left early. Riku wasn't up yet. Thankfully."

Kairi raised an eyebrow and took a sip from her drink without saying anything.

"You know, I really don't think that Sephiroth is that bad." Sora softly spoke, sitting himself on one of the couches and looking at the decorated tree.

The redhead shook her head, lay her mug on the glass low table and took place next to her friend to face him sternly; "Na-uh, do you forget what he did to my brother? There's no way a guy like that can be good."

Sora sighed and directed his eyes to the brown surface of his warm drink, "But yesterday I felt these feelings of regret coming from him, like he really wanted to try."

"Try what?"

"Try to make things work." Sora said, looking at her, "I mean, he knows that he's not really wanted here, but still he wants to try."

Kairi gave him a suspicious look, "Is there something you're not telling me?"

Sora shrugged, "What?"

The redhead rolled her eyes, "You're feeling sorry for him."

"Well, yeah…" Sora whispered, "A little."

"Sora…" Kairi exasperatedly whispered, "He's a heartbreaker, a total egoist. He always goes out for what he's looking for. Who knows, maybe he tricked you!"

Sora gave her a doubtful stare, "Why would he do that?"

"Maybe because he wants you to see Riku as the bad guy and turn the tables in his favour."

"I would never chose sides against Riku, you know that." Sora reassuringly said, shaking his head.

Kairi shook her head in turn, "Just be careful Sora, he's very manipulative, don't always believe everything he says."

"Believe everything who says?"

Kairi and Sora turned their heads to the income hall and heard the front door close as Wakka suddenly appeared followed by Riku.

Kairi stood up and walked up to her boyfriend, "Believe everything that you say; just admit it: you didn't get him that Kamasutra kit for Christmas did you?"

"A Kamasutra kit?" Riku echoed, walking passed them and sitting next to Sora to kiss him on his lips.

Sora chuckled and he and Kairi shared a knowing gaze, Sora silently thanking her.

"Sora will just have to wait until next week to find that out, now won't he?" Wakka responded with a sly smile to his girlfriend, kissing her nose.

"So, got to see the horses?" Sora asked Wakka.

"Yeah, though I don't think I'll be riding one any time soon… One of them almost bit my hand off when I tried to feed it with a carrot." He answered, moving himself to sit on the other couch with his girlfriend on his lap.

Riku chuckled, "Bryn is a little temperamental, but he'll grow to like you."

"What did the trainer say? Can we go horse riding tomorrow?" Sora softly whispered to his boyfriend.

"Yeah, it should be no problem." Riku whispered back with a loving smile.

"Okay, that's settled then," Kairi spoke, "Sora and I decorated the house and we think we deserve a reward for that."

"It really is beautifully decorated…" Riku said as he looked around, "But you're not going to tell me that you got to that chandelier all by yourself."

"Or got to the top of the windows to stick those stars up there." Wakka added with a grin.

"Hey, we worked hard!" Sora protested.

"Uh-huh, Leon or Cloud helped, didn't they?" Riku said with a doubtful look as he kept admiring the nice decorative work.

"Just a little." Kairi said, holding her right thumb and index slightly apart.

That made both Riku and Wakka chuckle.

"Don't we deserve some sort of reward?" Sora whispered softly to Riku, putting up his best puppy eyes.

"Yeah…" Kairi whispered to her boyfriend.

Riku turned his head to his friend, "Is now the right time?"

"It's time, brotha." Wakka agreed.

"We passed by a club on our way back…" Riku started.

"And we saw this poster of a big star hanging out." Wakka continued.

Riku reached over to Sora's forehead and tucked a strand of his hair behind an ear, "We wanted to surprise you guys with maybe a nice night out…"

"Yet sadly, to our dismay, all tickets were sold out…" the redhead said with a sad look on his face.

"Who was it?" Kairi asked softly, but Wakka silenced her and continued. "So my bro and I got out of the car to see if there wasn't any way possible to still get in."

"Cause you see," Riku took over, "We both knew how much you two would like to see this person and because we love you more than anything in this world…"

Sora was starting to get impatient, "Tell us already!"

Wakka chuckled, "You tell them?"

Riku nodded, while turning his head back to look at Sora, "And so, Wakka and I bought tickets in pre-sale before coming to Crystle…"

Sora moved himself to sit with his knees on the couch, "And…?" He urged, speaking through his teeth and taking Riku by his collar, shaking him slightly.

"And… we got you guys back-stage passes to see Utada tonight." Riku spoke with a small smirk on his face.

For a moment Sora just looked at him and then he looked at Kairi who had the same disbelieving expression on her face. And then…

"Are you frickin' kidding me!" Sora yelled, before embracing his boyfriend, "That's unbelievable! Oh baby, thankyouthankyouthankyou!"

"This doesn't count as a Christmas present now does it?" Kairi suspiciously asked her boyfriend.

Wakka chuckled and nuzzled his nose against hers lovingly, "Do I need a reason to give my baby a special night out?"

Kairi giggled and thought about it for a moment before shaking her head and jumping up with Sora to sing the first verse of 'Devil inside' and then screaming at the top of their lungs in total excitement.

The other two just shared a chuckle before covering their ears and silently leaving the lounge with pleased smiles on their faces.

"We're good, ya?"

Riku chuckled and slapped his hand in Wakka's waiting one, "You bet your ass we are bro."

_

* * *

"Cloud Strife is here to see you, sir." _

Frowning slightly, Sephiroth pressed in the button of the intercom, "Let him in, Lynn."

The door to his office suddenly flew open and a very pissed off Cloud entered before closing the door again. "We need to talk."

Sephiroth sat back with a questioning eyebrow, letting go of the pen he had been holding and putting it in front of him on his desk. "Hello to you too, Cloud." He said softly, "How may I help you?"

"Quit the fucking attitude, Sephiroth."

"What's wrong?" The elder man softly asked with concern.

"Oh please, like you care!" Cloud scoffed, "Like you fucking care!"

Sephiroth didn't reply but simply looked at him with a non-understanding expression.

"I need you to stay away from me!" Cloud said, irritated by the other's dumbfounded expression, "I need you to stop ruining my life!"

This made the elder man stand up and keep his eyes on the other man, who was returning the gaze defiantly. Sephiroth approached him and stopped right in front of him. "Don't fight it, just give into it."

Cloud shook his head as he took a step back, "You're so self-conceited…" He wanted to walk away, but was held back.

"Am I?" Sephiroth whispered, "Am I really, Cloud?"

_I can't do this…_Cloud thought to himself, trying desperately to free himself from Sephiroth's grip on his left arm. "Let go of me!"

"Tell me the true reason for your coming here, Cloud." Sephiroth whispered softly, feeling the blonde's resolve to be angry slowly crumble.

"I hate you!" Cloud tearfully whispered, his body refusing to struggle any longer against what was so obvious, but his heart not willing to forget what pain he endured because of the man. "I hate you so much for what you did to me…!"

"Cloud…" Sephiroth compassionately whispered, closing his eyes in remorse.

"I never told you… but I loved you, Sephiroth." The blonde now whimpered, his eyes tightly closed, "I loved you so much and you just ripped my heart out like it was nothing. How can I forgive you? How do you expect me to act after 7 years?"

Sephiroth made the blonde turn around and pulled him closer to him, "I've never stopped thinking about you. I've never stopped regretting either…"

Cloud didn't look at him, stubbornly refusing to. "It's too late."

"Is it?" Sephiroth whispered, making Cloud look up at him finally.

"You ruined it for us and I'm in love with another man now." Cloud turned his head to the side and closed his eyes, "We can't go back to what we were."

"Then at least give me this…" Sephiroth whispered as he lowered his lips on Cloud's, taking advantage of the blonde's weak moment.

Despite himself, Cloud found himself kissing him back fiercely, pouring in all the hate, all the pain and love he had been holding back for seven long years. His body seemed to have a will of its own; his heart feeling like it was on the verge of breaking, yet endlessly happy at the same time. He took his face in his hands and deepened the kiss, not wanting it to end, not wanting to return to reality… A reality where he couldn't and shouldn't be kissing Sephiroth like this, where he already had a loving and caring partner in his life and where his desires for his ex shouldn't be re-surfacing like they did now.

Sephiroth broke the kiss, looking into the other man's eyes intently, "We can have it all, Cloud. All I'm asking for is you."

Cloud closed his eyes at this and caressed his right cheek against Sephiroth's hand holding his face, a silent tear rolling out of his right eye. "You don't know what you're asking of me…"

Sephiroth gave him an indulgent look, "I'll be satisfied with what you can give, Cloud…"

The blonde sniffled and took a step back from him, disengaging their embrace. He needed some time to think it all through; he didn't know what he would do, where things stood between him and Leon and where what he just did would lead him to. He was old enough to know that he couldn't love two persons at the same time without tearing himself emotionally apart… and, inevitably, hurting someone along the way…

He turned around and exited Sephiroth's office, leaving a part of his heart behind with the one he once used to call his own.

* * *

The clock on the wall in front of him indicated 1.40 am as he looked up from his sitting position at the end of the bed he shared with Leon. He could hear the soft whispers of Sora and Riku who had just returned from their night out with Kairi and Wakka. He waited patiently in the darkness of his room for the silence to return in the house after he had heard all bedroom doors close themselves. He then slowly stood up, leaving Leon asleep in their bed and made his way to the door where he exited on the tip of his toes. 

Once in the corridor of the second floor, he then took the stairs right in front of their door leading to the third level of the house and to the attic room.

Not wasting any time with hesitating any longer, Cloud opened the sole door at the top of the stairs as soundlessly as he could, peeking inside the large, dark room.

He found himself in Sephiroth's home office now, and there was a door at the opposite site of the space. He crossed the room quickly, still on the tip of his bare toes until he reached the next door and laid a hand on the doorknob. The door opened without a noise, granting him access to a moonlit bedroom.

On his right he found a king-size bed and in it, the sleeping form of Sephiroth, sleeping on his back. Cloud approached the bed and laid himself on it with stealth before creeping underneath the covers and up the man's body until he practically straddled him.

Sephiroth only grunted silently in his sleep.

He studied this handsome man's features leisurely; tracing with a finger over his lips lovingly and watching how they slightly parted as in invitation.

Closing his eyes, he then lowered his lips into his neck, gently pressing a soft kiss on the smooth skin there, his hands roaming over Sephiroth's broad chest with delicate fingers.

As he laid there with his eyes closed and nose buried in Sephiroth's silver mane, he felt a pair of hands sliding their way up his back and embracing him tenderly. Cloud slightly moved his head and azure met with jade, their faces inches apart.

Cloud then sat up, making sure that their eyes were still locked and loosened the knot that held his night robe together, letting the opened parts slide down his now bare skin.

Sephiroth reached out to him and caressed his right cheek, pulling him down on him, accepting the offer the other had made.

Their kiss was passionate and sweet this time, setting the tone for their joining.

Knowing that there wasn't much time for extended foreplay, Sephiroth slowly sat up as he felt Cloud wiggle his hips, silently asking for him to take him. He took hold of the smaller male's hips and positioned him on top of him, looking him in the eyes.

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They collapsed on the bed, Sephiroth listening to Cloud's ragged breathing with an endeared smile. For a few moments they didn't move from their position, Sephiroth caressing circles on Cloud's left shoulder with his thumb, occasionally pressing soft kisses in the other's neck.

This felt so right, it seemed so good… Cloud had a smile on his face as he closed his eyes at the tender ministrations. Yet he knew that he couldn't stay any longer, no matter how good it felt. He first turned his head to look at Sephiroth from the corner of his left eye before completely shifting his body so he was on his back.

A soft kiss was shared between them, both dreading the time for separation that was drawing nearer. With a lingering nip on Cloud's lower lip Sephiroth let go, moving himself away so Cloud could stand.

Tying a knot on his dressing robe now, Cloud watched how Sephiroth approached him and stopped right in front of him, caressing a few of his locks behind his right ear.

"Thank you," The tall white haired one whispered with a soft smile.

Cloud closed his eyes and pressed a kiss in the palm of Sephiroth's hand stroking his right cheek. "It's alright…" He opened his eyes and removed the hand caressing his face gently, "Goodnight, Seph."

Sephiroth watched him make his way to the door and leave through it; his heart feeling empty once more as he found himself alone is his large room, bathing in the pale moonlight.

* * *

Sora walked up the last step of the stairs towards the second floor, holding a bottle of water he had just gotten himself from the kitchen, when he heard someone descending the set of stairs coming from the top floor. He waited patiently, wanting to greet Sephiroth as he came down the stairs, since he hadn't seen him all day and not wanting to give him the impression that he had wanted to hide from him by entering his room rapidly. 

To his great surprise though, he saw Cloud descending the stairs in his dressing robe that he held closely to his body. Sora quickly took a few steps back down the stairs, making it look like he was just coming from downstairs, reaching the top of the stairs again just in time as Cloud prepared to descend them.

"Sora." He looked and sounded a little surprised as he saw the little brunette, "I thought you were already asleep, how was the concert?"

"It was great!" Sora whispered back, silently noticing that Cloud was holding his dressing robe a little closer to him, and constantly tucking his hair back behind his right ear. "I just went down to get something to drink. Well, goodnight then."

"Goodnight," Cloud nodded and continued his way down as Sora passed him by.

Sora entered his room and closed the door. Riku was already asleep in their bed. He entered the covers and placed the bottle of water next to him on his night table. He felt Riku's right arm pull him down beside him and he quickly turned off his light before nestling himself in his partner's arms for the night.

As he watched Riku's face in the little silver light that entered their room, he wondered what he would've got done if it had been Riku descending those stairs, smelling like the sex he had had with someone else than him.

He wondered if Cloud had known how much he would hurt Leon with what he just did and if he even regretted it all…

"I love you, Riku," Sora whispered, suddenly feeling the urge to tell him that.

"I love you too, ange," Was Riku's murmured response before falling asleep again.

With a worried heart Sora snuggled closer to him and closed his eyes, desperate to find the depths of a worriless sleep.

_

* * *

To be continued… _

_**-BDP-**_


	5. Retrospection

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**_-Blackdiamond Princess!_**

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_**

* * *

**_FIVE : Retrospection

* * *

The next day was cold, yet sunny, driving everyone outside to enjoy the nice weather. 

The youngest couples of the group left early for their horseback riding session across town, leaving the three elder men the house for the morning.

Sitting himself on the wooden steps in front of the house with a warm cup of coffee in his hands, Leon quietly looked over the frozen scenery before him, enjoying the moment of calm and silence.

Cloud was still upstairs, taking his shower after their morning sex. Leon hadn't complained about this sudden impulsive movement of his partner and smiled gently at the memory.

He loved Cloud more than anything in this world; he was his light when things became a little too hard for him to endure on his own. He was the only one who knew how to appease his heart, the only one who knew how to keep its broken pieces together.

Leon sighed and looked up at the clear blue sky, thinking about how Cloud changed his life completely ever since they met.

He was young when his life became one ordeal after another; his father became an abusive bastard when he was thirteen and they were on the verge of losing their house, his mother hung herself after his father had beaten the crap out of her again, he dropped out of school and fled from home after his mother died and landed on the streets, living from day to day resulting in him becoming addicted to heroin and other narcotics to escape from the harsh reality his life had become. When he was 17, he met Rinoa, a girl that also lived on the streets, and they soon fell in love with each other. It was then that he realized for the first time that he wanted to do more with his life, that he wished he could take Rinoa to a better place, give her a better life.

For about three years they lived together in an abandoned apartment in the slums of the city, getting through their lives by committing minor criminal misschief.

When he was twenty, his first meeting with Cloud was actually a robbery gone wrong. He was threatening a liquor store holder with a knife, urging him to give him the content of his register while Cloud had been the sole costumer of the store doing some last minute groceries. When Leon spotted the unaware blonde in the back of the store, he had wanted to take the money the old man had already collected in his bag when he suddenly heard the sirens of the nearing police in the distance.

Cloud, wondering what the fuss was all about at the front of the store, soon came to an abrupt halt when he saw the masked brunette threatening the owner.

"What are you doing!" Cloud had asked him, making Leon wonder if the other had been plain stupid or if he had wanted to play the hero.

"What does it look like I'm doing, bitch!"

"Listen, you don't want to do this." Cloud had approached him with his hands held up defensively, "Just take my money, but leave this poor man alone. It's not worth it."

Cloud had held out five 100 dollar bills and had laid them on the counter. "Please, just go, leave him alone."

Something about this blonde's gesture had stirred something in him that night as he left the store with the 500 dollars. There had been something about him that had motivated him more to clean up his life.

They met again a couple of months later, but this time it was at the Eastern Hill Mall of DC and he was there, searching for a job when he recognised Cloud sitting behind his laptop in a coffee shop. He didn't know why he entered the fancy shop, with his filthy, trashed jeans and old leather jacket and shirt, but once he sat himself opposite from him, he couldn't help but feel at ease.

At first he just wanted to thank him for having helped him so long ago in the liquor store and that he was trying to find a job so he could pay him back the $500. To his great surprise he found Cloud particularly pleased to hear this and very supportive, yet refusing to accept the money, saying that he needed it more. He wondered why it was that this young man even cared about someone like him. When he got to hear that it was just how he was, he was even more puzzled, but he guessed that not everyone had grown up in the streets and led a hard life like he had.

By the end of their conversation they had exchanged quite a lot of facts about each other and he had gotten an invitation to come to Cloud's apartment in DC centre.

The next time he saw Cloud was a few days later in his apartment and he had good news to tell him; he had landed himself a job as a model for one of the most renowned houses of haute couture.

Once he started his work as a model, he moved with Rinoa to a more residential area of DC and settled there, but as the months and the seasons passed, he felt his attraction for her fade, her attitude and style of life not adequate for the social status they had now. She accused him many times of wanting them to be something they simply were not and on days like those, he found his refuge with Cloud who always was willing to listen to him and give him advice, even though he had just broken up with Sephiroth back then.

It didn't take him long to realize that the reason for his decreasing attraction towards Rinoa was his growing longing for Cloud. His visits to the blonde increased in number, so much that he barely used to spend 3 nights a week in his own house.

He knew that Rinoa was also struggling with her detoxification process and that she had accepted to go to a detox centre to help her off the drugs. He had really believed that she would've got made it, but three weeks after her admission to the centre, she slit her wrists with a plastic knife…

Up until today he still regretted the way he had handled the situation that had led to her suicide, bringing back the death of his own mother who had also taken her own life, making him feel guilty for not having helped both of them enough.

Cloud was there for him in those dark days, trying to help as much as he could, piercing through his stormy clouds with his comforting words and gestures. When Cloud decided to move back to Destiny Island he joined him, hoping to mend the pieces of his heart —torn apart by city life— that kept coming loose.

He felt truly lucky to have found someone like him, he had a truly loving partner and he wouldn't ever love and care for someone as much as he did for his Cloud, yet he knew that the arrival of his ex had slipped doubts in his mind.

It was useless to pretend that he didn't know about the feelings Cloud still had for his ex, he knew those were normal. He himself still found himself thinking about Rinoa at times. What he did not accept was to just sit around and let things go their way. He would fight for Cloud if it came down to that. Losing him was definitely not an option.

Not after everything they went through.

* * *

"I saw Sephiroth just before we left, you know." 

Sora saddled his horse as he heard Riku speak those words, "And?" He airily asked, "Did you kill him?"

Riku chuckled humourlessly and held Sora by his hips so he could mount his horse, "You knew he was already here, didn't you?"

The brunette sighed and turned his head to his boyfriend, "You were going to find out one way or another anyway."

"How long has he been here?"

Sora bit his lower lip, scratching the back of his head, "Since Friday night…?"

Riku snorted and scowled, "Friday night? You knew then and you didn't tell me?"

"See?" Sora said exasperatedly, throwing his hands in the air, "That's exactly what I didn't want to deal with!"

Riku shook his head sternly, "But you should've got told me, Sora."

"So what, you could go and get mad at me some more?" Sora replied, taking the leather reins in his hands and trotting out of the stable.

Riku grunted at Sora's touchiness and mounted his black horse and quickly followed him outside. "Baby, I didn't mean it like that. I just wished you had told me about it, that's all."

"You still would have gotten mad," Sora said over his shoulder, taking a left turn in the direction of the outer fence of the ranch.

"Yes, but not at you." Riku replied, picking up speed so he could catch up to Sora, "I wouldn't have gotten mad at you."

Sora just shook his head, "You still don't get it, do you?" He rolled his eyes at him and went into a gallop.

Not having much of a choice, Riku followed him into the woods. "Sora, hold on!"

Sora slowed down and finally came to a halt near a clearing in the woods, dismounted his horse and led it to it by foot. He waited for Riku to come and find him, tying the mammal to a nearby tree in the meantime.

"What was that all about?" Riku asked, getting off his horse and walking towards him.

"You is what it was all about, you is what it's been all about ever since we arrived here!" Sora said crossing his arms over his chest.

"What?" Riku said, still not comprehending why Sora was acting like this all of a sudden.

"Before we came here, you made a promise to me; you wouldn't let your brother ruin our vacation." The brunette softly spoke, "And yet here we are, and I have to hide his presence from you so I can enjoy you not being mad for once and cause the same stress we wanted to escape from in the first place."

Riku sighed out softly and directed his eyes to besnowed ground. He had totally forgotten about that.

"I don't need to know what happened between you two, but I've had it with constantly having to walk on eggshells!" Sora could suddenly feel tears stinging behind his eyelids and he knew he was starting to get all emotional again. In truth, he was afraid of Riku's reaction to what he thought his brother did with Cloud last night. He didn't want to have to deal with that, Riku would get pissed and he hated it when Riku was angry; it got really hard to reason with him. He wished he hadn't seen anything at all and that he didn't feel the way he felt right now; desperate to have his old Riku back, not the grumpy, humourless one.

"Sora please… no…" Riku softly whispered, seeing the threatening tears in his lover's eyes. He hated it when Sora got sad and especially now; these were supposed to be happy times… It was almost Christmas, he shouldn't be crying at all. "I'm sorry, I know I promised…"

Sora threw himself in his arms and held him tightly, "Baby I love you so much, too much! But I can't stand it when you're angry and I can't help… I can't stand it because it pushes me away from you and I don't want that!"

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…" Riku repeatedly whispered, stroking Sora's hair again and again, "Please don't cry?"

Sora sniffled and looked up at him, "Don't push me away, Riku…" One tear escaped from his right eye and rolled down his cheek, "No matter what, please."

Riku wiped away the tear and held him close again, sensing that something else was bothering Sora. "I promise, Sora." he said, hearing his own voice break.

Sora was looking up at the sky, his unspoken fear that had risen up last night still shaking his heart, "Don't promise me, Riku, just don't do it."

Riku fell silent at that and simply nodded, knowing that he had failed Sora one time too many...

They mounted their horses again after that, riding back towards the ranch to pick up Kairi and Wakka so they could go back home for lunch.

* * *

"Yup, he fell off the horse." 

Riku snickered, serving Kairi some more soup in her bowl. Leon, Cloud, Kairi and Sora laughed except for Wakka, who was the object of laughter.

"Ha ha… yeah, you try and climb on that damn animal when it doesn't stand still," He sulked crossing his arms over his chest.

"But you have to admit that it was kind of funny," Kairi giggled taking her bowl of hot soup out of Riku's hands.

"Even the horse seemed to be laughing when it trotted away from you," Sora added, barely able to maintain his chuckle while everyone burst out in laughter again.

"Just go ahead, ya? Laugh your heart out, I'm never mounting a horse again." The redhead murmured, sulking even more.

"You just had a temperamental horse, that's all," Riku soothingly said, "Next time it'll be better you'll see. We're going again next week."

"Na-uh! Na-uh! You ain't going to be seeing me on another damned four legged, hay eating animal again."

"Why? You tried mounting a sheep too?" Sora chuckled.

Kairi and Riku kept themselves from laughing this time, although with great difficulty and Riku giving his boyfriend a gentle warning to stop teasing his friend.

Wakka didn't say anything and resumed his sulking, not giving the others a gaze.

"Ok, sorry for that one," Sora apologised taking his bowl of soup out of Riku's hands. "Hey, maybe we can go swimming or something?"

"That's a great idea," Kairi said, turning to look at her still brooding boyfriend, "Then I can show you my new two piece."

"The tong one?" Wakka's head suddenly jumped up.

"Don't even think about it," Cloud simply said, serving himself some soup. Kairi was about to reply to him but he cut her short, "And don't even think about it either. I'm not going to have my sister swinging her naked butt cheeks at some pool where every sex deprived freak can come and drool all over her."

"I don't even have a tong swimsuit," Kairi retorted to her brother before slapping Wakka's arm, "You perv."

Sora giggled as he watched the interaction between the two siblings, wishing that a certain platinum haired cutie would do the same with his.

"What are you thinking about?" Riku pressed a kiss on Sora's hair.

Sora softly smiled at him, "Nothing," he whispered, "Don't worry about it."

Riku watched him for a moment as he ate his soup and then leant in to him to whisper in his ear again, "I'll tell you everything after lunch."

Blue eyes widened in surprise, "You don't have to, if you don't feel ready…"

"I wouldn't be saying this if I wasn't, babe."

"Oh…" Sora smiled softly, "Okay then."

"Alright," Riku contently said, sipping from his soup.

Sora watched him too for a moment before continuing his meal. Maybe Sephiroth and Riku would make up so that Sephiroth didn't have to feel forced into eating up in his room on his own and so Sora wouldn't have to feel so immensely sorry for him anymore.

* * *

Sora sat himself cross-legged at the end of their bed with a pillow in his lap, watching how Riku took one of the chairs standing next to the window and put it in front of Sora with its backing directed to him. 

He waited patiently for his boyfriend to gather his thoughts and get ready. He wouldn't deny that he was extremely curious now, but because this was a very sensitive issue for Riku, he couldn't push him into doing anything too fast.

Riku gave him a hesitant smile when he looked up at him and Sora returned it with an encouraging one so he could begin.

"Remember when we first met?" He spoke softly with a smile, directing his eyes to the floor in reminiscence, "I think you were five or something then, right?"

Sora nodded, "Yeah, you just moved a couple of houses down the street from us with your mother and brother. We immediately became friends."

"You were my only friend then; I didn't like the other kids like I liked you." Riku softly spoke with a smile, still not looking at him.

"You were always there for me when I got into trouble…" Sora scratched the back of his head sheepishly.

"You were a magnet for trouble then…" Riku chuckled, "You still are by the way."

"Oh!" Sora gasped, offended, "I was not! And besides, you must like trouble if you fell in love with me!" He giggled.

Riku snickered softly, looking at the floor again, "Maybe I do… but the facts still are that a day wasn't a day if I didn't help you out of trouble at least twice."

"It's not like I did it on purpose…" The brunette whispered with a grin.

The elder grinned back tenderly, "But that's how I got so protective of you. I couldn't stand to see you hurt."

Sora smiled again and Riku looked up, sharing a gaze of tender affection.

"As long as you were happy, I could be too," He then said, "I envied you so much at times, you know?" He whispered, his eyes trailing away from Sora again to rest on the scenery outside their window. "Your life seemed so perfect."

Sora frowned and cocked his head to the side, "That's odd; I always thought that of you."

Riku scoffed and shook his head, "You had both your parents and they loved you so much… deep down, that's what I always longed for too…"

"But," Sora was a little confused now, "you had your mother who loved you very much too, didn't she?"

"She was the best, but after a while it wasn't enough anymore…" Riku whispered, closing his eyes now. "I once had what you have, but I was simply too young to remember how it feels like."

"Your parent's divorce?"

"Not only that…" Riku said, looking out the window again, "Also because my real father died just before we moved to Destiny Island."

Sora was utterly confounded now, "What do you mean, your real father died before you moved to DI? I thought your parents got divorced when you were two—?"

"My real dad died in a car accident when I was 6, in the same year I met you." Riku whispered, "My mother indeed got divorced, but the man she once married wasn't my father, he was only Seph's."

Then it suddenly dawned upon him and Sora brought a hand to his mouth in astonishment. "You're an…?"

"Illegitimate child, yes…" Riku's voice was barely audible as he spoke those words, their conversation now taking on a sad tone. "Seph's my half brother, we share the same mother."

"I… I never knew…" Sora whispered, not knowing what else to say for the moment.

"Only the family knew…" Riku replied, "My step dad was very shaken by my mother's betrayal and couldn't stand the sight of me so he divorced my mother two years after I was born.

Mum received shared custody over Seph after the divorce, but Seph only visited his father in the weekends and during the holidays and stayed with mum and me during the schooldays. Because of our resemblance everyone just thought that we were real brothers. My mother never treated us otherwise and Seph and me didn't either. He was really my big brother to me."

"Did you often see your step dad?" Sora softly asked.

"He had his business in DC and sent my mother and brother letters and money, but never cared about me. I didn't really care about him either, but I wasn't blind to the pain it caused to my mother. He used to send her money every month and she would put a part of it in my bank account, always saying that my step dad had given me some, but I knew better. He hates my guts; every Christmas we spent here with the rest of the family he never failed to show his ice cold affection towards me. But I never cared, as long as he didn't insult my mum, it was fine and I'd take it."

"He insulted her?" Sora incredulously asked.

"Well, it was more like disdainful behaviour at times…" Riku said, then falling silent before continuing. "And yet she always strived for him to accept me. She would do anything…"

Sora heard the held back tears in his voice now and stood up to comfort him. "Riku…"

"Even after she died, you know?" Riku sniffled and accepted Sora's arms embracing him as he sat himself behind him and rested his forehead against his back. "It was all she asked for him to do."

Sora sighed in sympathy and tightened his hold on him.

"But you know what the worst part in all of this was?" Riku then said and Sora could hear the held back anger in his voice. "When I was old enough to understand all that was going on, I soon realised that my big brother never stuck one finger out to help mum when the arguments between her and her ex started to increase because of me. I felt like he had betrayed both mum and me, I understood that it was his dad, but why choose sides against his mother? I know I'm not his real brother, but we got along just fine during the 14 years I felt like I had a brother… I grew to hate him just because he abandoned mum and me, just like his dad did."

Sora gulped silently as he listened, this ran a lot deeper than he originally thought… He knew what was coming next now that he felt Riku sob. He had already heard it from Cloud.

"And when she died and I felt like I needed him the most…" Riku whimpered, closing his eyes and letting twin tears rolling down his cheeks, "He didn't even care to show up at her funeral!"

"Oh baby," Sora whispered compassionately, close to tears himself now and standing back up. Riku stood in turn and threw himself in his arms, crying uncontrollably, shedding the tears he had held back at the funeral and those he hadn't showed in the past years.

Sora held him close, caressing his hair comfortingly, fighting back his own tears while looking at the ceiling, wondering what he could say next to soothe Riku's state of mind.

"Why did you carry around such a heavy burden on your own for so long, baby?" He whispered softly, Riku's tears still flowing. "I'm here for you now, use me when you have problems. I told you so before, baby; please entrust me your pain, and share it with me. I want to be your pillar of strength."

"You really are an angel, Sora…" Riku whimpered, tightening his grip on him.

Sora smiled softly and kissed him on his left cheek, "Not yet, I'm still working to get my wings."

This made Riku laugh heartedly and he disengaged their embrace so he could look at him, "You're so wonderful, Sora… I feel blessed with you here with me."

A blush covered the younger one's cheeks at this and he shyly averted his eyes, "You are the one who brings it up in me… I'm not doing this on my own."

Riku made him look at him with a finger underneath his chin, "That still means that those wonderful abilities already are inside of you and that you indeed are a wonderful person."

Sora smiled, blushing some more, "I try my best."

"I love you, Sora. With my entire heart." Riku slowly lowered his face on Sora, "So much."

Sora let those smooth lips press against his before parting his lips and deepening the kiss briefly. Riku then moved in to embrace him again.

"I know my stupid behaviour ruined the mood for our vacation, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make you feel more at ease now." He whispered.

Sora smiled, "If it'll make you feel better; I know from good source that Sephiroth wants to make up with you."

"Really?"

"Uh-huh…" Sora nodded, "And I know you're dying to do so too, and not just for me."

Riku grinned down at him before sweeping him off his feet and laying him on the bed, "You know what I'm dying to do right now?" He whispered in a low sexy tone, nuzzling the brunette's throat.

"Wait," Sora held him at a safe distance now, "Does this have anything to do with what I feel poking against my thigh right now?"

Riku snickered, "In part, yeah."

Sora giggled, "You know that this is not a good time, right?

Riku chuckled back, "You're joking, right?"

The brunette gave him an apologising smile, "I wouldn't want someone coming in and disturbing us…"

"Then we'll lock the door," Riku shrugged and lowered his lips in Sora's throat.

Sora moaned loudly, knowing that Riku was trying to weaken his resolve, "Ahh… I don't… t-think…"

"Yes. Don't think." Riku now nibbled on his left earlobe. "Just stop thinking at all."

**_(Hehe...)_**

They suddenly heard the door slightly creak as the sound of descending footsteps was heard in the corridor.

"Riku."

"Hn?"

"Why is the door open?"

"Oh shit…"

Sora grabbed a pillow from the bed and whacked Riku over the head with it forcefully, sending him on the floor next to the bed with a loud 'thump'.

* * *

_To be continued..._

**_-BDP-_**


	6. House of broken glass

* * *

SIX : The house of broken glass

* * *

"That was uncalled for!"

"Oh shut up." Sora retorted to Riku's complaint. He stood up from the bed and picked up his discarded clothes that were lying around the bed. "Then we'll lock the door, he says. Don't think, he says. You complete me, he says. Ha! That was the last time I fell for those."

Riku was getting up cautiously, fearing his lover's wrath. "I'm sorry..." He apologized, but only received his jeans on his face. "I'm sorry!" He said again, but received no answer whatsoever. "Sora? Ange? Babe?" He tried, but Sora had already slammed the bathroom's door shut and locked the door from the inside.

With a sigh he sat himself on the bed and took his pants from his head. "Great... Just great..."

* * *

Cloud was watching with a suspicious eye how Kairi was applying a dark red colour on her toe nails andpurposely not paying attention to him. "Do you sleep with him?"

Kairi glared at him briefly, "He's my boyfriend and we've been together for almost three years."

"That's just the problem; it's been that long already." Cloud spoke, now crossing his arms.

Kairi gave her brother a non-understanding look, "What is the matter with you?"

"Nothing, I'm just looking out for you." He replied as if what he said was the most obvious thing in the world.

"I can look out for myself, thank you." She spoke, frowning at her elder brother's strange attitude. "I love Wakka and he loves me, Cloud. We don't need any babysitter."

The blonde simply sighed, "I just... Be careful, okay? You're a girl—"

"What?" Kairi said in an offended tone, "I can't believe you just said that!"

"Will you let me finish!" Cloud interjected, "You're a girl, Kai. And what I mean to say is, that I don't want to become an uncle anytime soon. Even if that would be great, but I guess that you know what I mean."

Kairi laughed and gave her brother a tender look. "We always use protection, Clo..." She stood up and wiggled her way to her brother so her toes wouldn't get ruined and sat next to him on the couch opposite from her. "I'm not ready to become a mother anyway..."

Cloud took his sister in his arms and held her to him tightly, "I guess it's just that I missed you very much, it's been almost 6 months since I've seen you. And now we're back together and you've changed so much it's almost scary. You're a woman now. A very attractive and beautiful woman on top of that."

"Aww..." Kairi soothingly murmured, holding him close as well, "Thank you... I've missed you too, big bro..."

"I've missed this too... You calling me 'Big bro'." Cloud whispered, kissing her on her cheek.

They suddenly saw the sliding doors of the lounge open themselves and Wakka entering. He sat himself on the couch opposite from the siblings, took the remote from the low table and turned on the TV. He didn't say a word.

Both Kairi and Cloud shared a questioning look before Kairi stood and walked over to her boyfriend to ask what was wrong.

"Wakka? Are you okay?" She whispered, placing a comforting hand on his left shoulder. "Honey?"

Wakka suddenly turned off the tv and turned to face her. "You know? I think we should put up some rules for as long as we are to stay here." He spoke and Kairi blinked a few times at the way his voice sounded. It was high pitched and shaky. "I mean, there are two gay couples and us two. I-It's natural that the need to express feelings in a more physical way will occur, but god... doors, normal people close doors!"

Kairi looked at her brother, not making much out of her boyfriend's rambling. "Huh...?"

Cloud smirked and shook his head, "Again, huh?"

"What do you mean, again?" Wakka suddenly asked, "You mean they go at it like that all the time?"

The blonde closed his eyes and nodded, the smirk now turning into a grin. "And they're quite loud too."

"That I knew, but what I saw in there..." Wakka shuddered in horror.

"Oh my god, you saw them? Riku and Sora?" Kairi giggled, "Oh crap, and I missed it!"

Both men were now giving her very confused looks.

The girl held her hands in front of her in defence, "Hey, don't look at me like that! Since I found out that my best friends turned out to be gay and doing each other, I can't help but find that hot."

Cloud was laughing now and Wakka groaned, "Riku's my buddy too, but looking at him having sex with Sora is not exactly my idea of a turn on." He stood up and walked out of the living room, "I need to go wash my eyes out."

Kairi watched him leave and giggled again, bending over to look at her toe-nails.

Cloud watched her for a moment and then leant back against the couch. "So what did you think when I turned out to be gay?" He softly whispered, curious.

"Let me see... how old was I when I caught you and Sephiroth up in your room 'playing doctor'..." She put her right foot on the edge of the low table in front of her and blew softly. "Eleven? Twelve?"

"Sephiroth and me was almost a decade ago." Cloud grinned.

"Well, alright, I think I was ten back then. I didn't really care." Kairi shrugged, "I guessed that if you were in love, it didn't matter with whom it was."

Cloud smiled, his eyes trailing away from his sister, thoughts of last night crawling into his mind.

"But just for the record, I've never really liked Sephiroth anyway and I still don't." She said, now wiggling her toes and nodding approvingly. "I really hated him from what he did to you. He is such a jerk."

"He is." He agreed, though he couldn't help the small smirk tugging at the corners of his lips.

Kairi closed the small bottle of nail polish while still looking at her toes and missing the small smile her brother wore just seconds before. "Why don't you and Leon come to the club with us tonight? I'm sure it'll be fun."

"I'd really love to, but we already have other plans for the night." The blonde spoke, glancing at his watch.

"What are you guys going to do?"

"I honestly don't even know. Leon said it was a surprise." He stood up, "He said he'd come and pick me up at 6 and it's almost 5.30 so I need to go change."

"Woo... sounds romantic, never thought that Leon was that type of guy." She giggled, standing up too.

"Well he did say that it was all a surprise, didn't he?" Cloud chuckled.

They heard someone descending the stairs now and they turned their heads to the entrance of the room. Riku entered the living room, wearing a long black shirt and jeans. He was dragging with his feet, looking a little depressed.

"Hey you guys." He said without looking at them and plopping down on the couch next to Kairi and taking his face in his hands.

"Hey, what's wrong with you?" Kairi asked, looking at her friend with an amused smile.

"Sora's mad at me." Was all Riku said from beneath his hands covering his face.

Cloud chuckled, "Someone forgot to close the door..."

"God, I could just so slap myself right now." Riku whined, shaking his head remorsefully.

"Being in the doghouse bites." Kairi understandingly said before clapping in her hands happily, "Are we still on for tonight?"

Riku looked up at her with a disbelieving face and then covered his face with his hands again, "I don't think Sora'll want to go anymore."

"Then you come with us!" Kairi cheerfully said, "Come on!"

"If Sora doesn't want to go, then maybe you should, Riku." Cloud agreed, "Give him some space, I'm sure he'll come around."

"Cloud, he's locked himself up in our bathroom." Riku spoke as a matter-of-factly, "He won't even let me get in to wash myself up."

"He's locked himself up?" Kairi asked, "Boy, you are in trouble."

"I know." The silver haired one groaned.

"You can use ours, it's no problem." Cloud offered. "Besides you won't make it better if Sora doesn't want to see you with hanging around the house on your own. Give him some space."

"You're right..." Riku reluctantly whispered, standing back up. "God, how I hate this..."

Cloud put his right hand on the young man's left shoulder sympathetically, "He'll come around, don't worry."

"I hope so, because I have this feeling that I messed up big time with this one..." He moved himself back up the stairs, with his head hanging.

"You know, just between you and me?" Cloud said underneath his breath to his sister as Riku had disappeared from their sight. "Watching Sora and Riku fight is almost as good as watching some sort of soap opera drama."

Kairi laughed, "I know, you know that they'll kiss and make up, but the fights are just too juicy to zap away from."

* * *

The door to the bathroom finally opened again after 3 hours now that the house was empty and Sora stepped out, cautiously looking around for a sign of his boyfriend. Finding none, he then made his way to the door and descended the stairs. Once in the welcoming hall, he found all lights out, except for a small trail of light coming through the slightly opened doors of the lounge. He frowned a little, for he had expected the house to be empty tonight. He slid the doors apart and found Sephiroth sprawled out on the left couch in front of the fire, watching TV.

"Sora, good evening, I thought you had gone out." He softly spoke, moving himself to sit in a more presentable position.

"I didn't really feel like going out." Sora softly said with a soft smile, his eyes falling on the half eaten up pepperoni and cheese pizza on the low table.

Sephiroth followed his gaze and immediately moved to offer the young boy some. "I didn't see you leave with the others and I didn't see you at dinner."

"No," He softly whispered, not wanting to step into the details. "Thanks." He thankfully accepted the slice held out to him. "What are you watching?"

"CNN," Sephiroth whispered with a smile and took the remote. "But we can watch something else if you want."

"Oh, but I don't want to bother you or anything..." Sora quickly spoke.

"I've been here for almost three days and I can really use a change from my work or from the boredom." The older one spoke with a small smile.

Sora fell silent and sat himself next to Sephiroth. "Ok." He nodded, feeling another wave of sympathy for the man.

"Besides it looks like you're the one who can really use some company..."

A minim smile tugged at the brunette's lips and he averted his eyes. There was so much he wanted to air off his heart, so much he wanted to say. The feelings of irritation he felt towards Riku, the angst he felt when he thought about their future together and his questions about what he saw last night.

He sighed and closed his eyes, "Normally I would've gone to Cloud for advice, but since I think he has his own problems, I don't really know what to do."

"Cloud's your marriage counsellor?" Sephiroth smirked, making Sora chuckle briefly.

"Kinda."

"Well, I'm ready to listen, if you want to talk to me." Sephiroth said with a comforting smile.

Sora chuckled, a little embarrassed at the situation. "No offence, but I don't really know you. I only know what other people told me about you."

"Then that makes me wonder even more about why you're here talking to me." Sephiroth said, now leaning with his left elbow on the couch's end and observing Sora with a fascinated gaze.

One perfectly shaped brown eyebrow rose questioningly, "Because I'm old enough to form my own judgements on people? I can't just let myself get influenced by what other people have said, I need confirmation for myself."

Sephiroth gave him a satisfied smirk and he bent over to pick up his glass of red wine. "You're a wise young man, Sora." He took a sip, "So what do you think of me? Am I the big bad wolf?"

Sora smiled softly, "That's pretty much what all the others said. Yet it seems that only Cloud and Riku once knew a more… sheepish side of you."

This made the older male laugh heartedly, "Do you believe I'm sheeplike, Sora?"

"Well I'm not saying you're an angel," Sora whispered with a hesitant smile, "but there must have been a reason for all those things you did in the past? I mean, you didn't just do all those things for no reason?"

Sephiroth narrowed his eyelids and leant in closer to the smaller brunette, who leant back a little at this strange move. "Are you always like this, Sora?"

Sora shrugged and blinked, "Like what?"

The other man chuckled and closed his eyes, "Trying to see the good in other people? Are you always so full of pity for those you don't understand?"

"I..." Sora frowned at him, not understanding from which angle he came all of a sudden. "N-no... I'm just trying to help."

"You can't help anyone by pitying them." He replied with a humourless smirk. His face was still close to Sora's and his half lidded eyes were now resting on his lips. "Don't get me wrong," He chuckled at Sora's now nervous state, "I do appreciate the effort, but spare me your pity."

Sora let go of the breath he had been holding in slowly as Sephiroth retreated from him. "I'm sorry."

"That won't help either." Sephiroth sternly said, still smirking.

Sora bit his lower lip and exhaled deeply, controlling his feelings of irritation. He felt deeply embarrassed by the way he had indeed been thinking of Sephiroth, but he wouldn't just leave because of that. He would prove to him that he really had wanted to help and not just pity him.

"But I understand because in the end, aren't we all selfish?" Sephiroth suddenly said, turning his head his way again. "Even when we don't mean to?"

Sora looked at him non-understandingly.

"Let me explain myself," he smiled. He scooted himself closer to Sora and pulled his right leg up his body so he could lean with his right elbow against it. "Do you know the true reason why people give money to charity or other good causes?" He asked with a smile that dripped with held back excitement.

Sora frowned and gave him a confused look; wasn't the answer obvious? "To help people who need it, what else?"

"My dear Sora," Sephiroth chuckled, "now I can see why Riku fell in love with you." He gave him a soft endeared smile, "You are deliciously naïve."

Sora averted his eyes turned his face away in growing shame.

Sephiroth chuckled again and placed his right hand fingertips underneath the smaller brunette's chin, so he'd look at him again. "That was in no way meant as an insult, Sora."

Sora gave him a defiant look, "Then why do they do it?"

"For their personal peace of mind." Sephiroth said, looking intently in his eyes. For a long moment it was silent between them, before the older man smiled at him again, "Isn't that what you hope to achieve by trying to mend the relationship between my brother and me?"

Sora was already shaking his head with a smirk before he suddenly realized that that had been indeed what he had hoped for... If Riku and his brother made up, then Riku wouldn't be mad all the time anymore and their relationship would be back on track. And he could have a peace of mind...

"But of course, that won't be possible any time soon, even if Riku and I were to make up tomorrow." Sephiroth poured himself some more wine, "Because between the two of you there are slightly nagging issues."

Sora was silently amazed and slightly annoyed by Sephiroth's insightful explanation. "How do you know all of this?"

"Well, for one, I've had some experience with human relations in my field of work and as for the little household problems between you and Riku, I simply heard you yell at him after you two had sex." He answered, emptying his glass.

"Oh..." Sora was now beet-red. "Ok... this is so embarrassing."

"I imagine it is." Sephiroth smiled, standing up and walking towards the bar behind Sora and taking out another glass for wine. "Wine?"

Sora turned and looked at him, shaking his head, "No, thank you. A soda would be nice."

"There's none here, I'll go get some in the kitchen." Sephiroth said and left the lounge.

Sora nodded and watched him leave. He caught himself looking at the man's lean, yet strong build, his beautiful long hair that fell all the way to his—

Something in the pocket of his sweater suddenly buzzed.

He took out his portable and looked at the caller ID. "Riku..." He sighed, a little irritated and relieved at the same time.

"Hey."

_"Hey, thought you'd be sleeping."_

Sora smiled and rolled his eyes, "It's only a quarter to nine."

_"What are you doing?"_

"Watching TV." He answered back, and turned his head just in time as Sephiroth handed him his glass of soda. "Thanks."

_"Who's that?"_

Sora chuckled, "It's Sephiroth. He just gave me a soda."

_"So you preferred staying at home with him?"_

Sora made an endeared sound at the smallness of his boyfriend's voice, indicating that he felt a little hurt. "No, we just talked that's all," He assured him, "And it's just that I needed to sort a few things out on my own."

_"Did you sort them out already? I miss you."_

Sora sighed and closed his eyes, "Not yet. It's a little..." He sighed again, searching for the best word to describe how he felt now. "It's a little complicated."

_"Complicated?"_

Sora sighed, "Yeah…"

_"Because of me?"_

Sora bit his lower lips and leant with his left elbow on his left thigh and held his forehead. "Riku…"

_"No, you can say it, it's okay. I probably deserve that one anyways."_

The brunette did not answer but just closed his eyes.

_"Sora? Hello?"_

"Why do you have to do that?" He whispered sadly.

Sephiroth turned his head away from the TV to look at Sora sitting next to him with a questioning eyebrow.

_"Do what?"_

"Make me feel guilty!" Sora said, his voice trembling as he was fighting the threatening tears. "I always end up feeling bad for something you cause…"

_"Sora what are you talking about? I said I was sorry—"_

"How can you be so selfish?" Sora whispered angrily, "You think a simple 'sorry' will make it all okay?"

Sephiroth now put down his glass of wine, watching with genuine concern at the escalation of the lovers' quarrel.

_"Selfish! What the hell has that—"_

"Yeah, selfish!" Sora loudly replied, "And I've had it!"

_"What's wrong with you!"_

Sora laughed jeeringly, "Oh? Because now that I'm angry there just has to be something wrong with me, huh?"

_"But I don't understand why—"_

"Well let me put it in words you'll be sure to understand, Riku. You're an insensitive, selfish prick!"

And with that he hung up and threw his portable on the carpeted floor.

Sephiroth frowned as he observed the younger male, not saying a word.

Sora ran his hands through his hair and looked at the chandelier for a few seconds before he sniffled, stood up, turned around and ran towards the stairs, seeking for the refuge of his room to let his tears flow free.

Sephiroth sighed and waited until he heard the door to Sora's room fall shut in the distance before he stood in turn and made his way up the stairs.

* * *

Muffled sobs and whimpers resounded in the dimly lit room as he cried his bitter tears into his pillow. A soft knock was heard coming from the door and he sobbed harder, not wanting to see anyone.

Sephiroth entered anyways and closed the door behind him softly.

"Go away." Sora whimpered, his head turned away from him on the pillow.

"I can't." Sephiroth simply whispered, approaching the bed and sitting himself at the end of it, next to Sora.

"Have you come to pity me?" The brunette whimpered, still not looking at him. "Come to laugh at me?"

Sephiroth frowned and shook his head, "Not at all. I want to try and give you comfort, if you let me."

Sora started to sob again, "How?"

"First tell me what's bugging you. And why you called Riku insensitive."

"Don't forget selfish." Sora added bitterly, sitting up now wiping away his tears. "He's selfish."

Sephiroth smiled briefly and laid a comforting hand on Sora's right shoulder. "And selfish…"

Sora now turned around, facing him, and crossed his legs on the bed. "Okay…" He sniffled and looked down into his lap, his hands playing nervously with a tissue.

"Okay…" Sephiroth softly whispered, patiently waiting for him to collect his thoughts.

With a sigh, Sora looked up again, having difficulties to keep his eyes locked with the other man's. "I've… I've been feeling… feeling stuck lately."

"Stuck?"

Sora nodded and another tear rolled down his right cheek, "Yeah… In my relationship with Riku..."

"What do you mean?"

"I feel like I can't… Riku he…" Sora sighed in desperation and growing frustration. He just couldn't seem to bring the words out.

Sephiroth took him by his hands and held them gently in his while he looked into his eyes. "Now breathe and calm down. Relax a little."

Sora took a deep breath and let it go slowly, closing his eyes, trying to calm his heart down.

"Now try again and tell me what the problem between you and my brother is." He whispered, still holding the brunette's hands.

Sora sighed and nodded. "I feel like I can't refuse Riku anything and that, because of that, he has grown to assume that whatever it is he wants I'll give it to him…"

"Do you feel satisfied with him?"

"Yes…" Sora smiled and opened his eyes, "He satisfies me in so many ways." The smile then slowly started to fade and the sad look from before came back on his face, "But not where it truly matters." He bent his head and closed his eyes again, not wanting to give into the new wave of sorrow that was commencing to take over again. "I love him, heaven knows how much I do, and I know he loves me too, but he has a problem with keeping his promises to me… it makes me feel of smaller importance in our relationship. Even when he says that I'm his equal, I just don't get that feeling from him in some things he does. And lately…" He blushed and turned his head to the side, "I feel almost abused when we make love—I know abused is a big word, but it's how I feel afterwards, because I always seem to regret it."

"Because you can't refuse him." Sephiroth added comprehensively.

"The sex is great and I always enjoy it, but it's over 80 percentof the time his insatiable lust that induces our lovemaking and I always end up having sex with him when at first I didn't feel like it." Sora pulled up his legs to his body and held them to him, "It's like he completely ignores what I really want assuming I'll want what he wants."

Sephiroth nodded in comprehension again. "Ah… selfish…"

Sora nodded, "And the worst part of it all is that he doesn't even seem to realise he's doing it."

"Insensible."

Sora nodded sadly, "I know what you might think; that I should try and refuse him from time to time and explain it to him, but it's not that easy." He wiped away another tear rolling from his left eye, "Because I'm terrified he'll go seek his satisfaction elsewhere." He now rested his head on his kneecaps and turned his face away from the elder man again, "Like Cloud did.

Seph rose one eyebrow in mild surprise at that statement.

"Yeah. I know." Sora whispered, now looking back at him. "And I don't understand."

Sephiroth chuckled, "Are you basing that on what you heard about Cloud and me, or is it something else?"

Sora shook his head, "I know that Cloud and Leon are happy together, I don't understand how you can love one person and still sleep with another, whether it is with love or not."

"You have never loved anyone beside my brother, so you cannot say otherwise..." Sephiroth gently spoke, smiling. "Though I think you will agree with me when I tell you that you cannot explain love rationally, you just know it when you feel it."

"Still... Leon is a friend and what you guys are doing to him..." Sora fell silent and just shook his head.

"The choice of telling him is entirely yours, but not your burden to carry." Sephiroth wisely spoke, raising a hand to stroke the younger one's right cheek soothingly.

"So I'm just supposed to sit back and watch you two sneak around?" Sora disbelievingly asked.

"You truly are a very compassionate person, aren't you Sora?" Sephiroth chuckled.

Sora sighed in defeat, "This is so wrong."

"Then stop thinking about it." He whispered back with a soft smile, "It is not a problem for you to handle."

Sora looked up at him again and smiled at him softly, "Thank you."

"Did I help?" The older one asked with a knowing smile.

The brunette giggled, nodded and took hold of Sephiroth's hand against his right cheek, "Yes, more than you even know."

"Alright," Sephiroth bent over and pressed a soft kiss on Sora's left cheek. He then halted just in front of his face, "You make my brother happy, Sora." He whispered, "Don't ever believe anything else."

Sora smiled at him and nodded, closing his eyes.

"So this is the reason why you stayed at home tonight?"

Both Sora and Sephiroth turned their head to the door of the room, finding Riku standing in its opening, looking furious.

Sora gasped as he realised in what position he and Sephiroth were in and shook his head rapidly while getting off the bed, "Riku! N-no, it's not what you think. We—"

"Save it." Riku whispered, shaking his head slowly.

Sephiroth sighed and stood up, "Still as narrow minded as ever, aren't we, little bro?"

Riku humourlessly chuckled, "You. Don't even talk to me, okay?"

"Riku please, we didn't—" Sora pleaded, but stopped abruptly as Riku took a step away from him in disgust.

"How could you?" He loathingly whispered, "How could you, Sora?"

"You're making a big mistake!" Sephiroth sternly spoke approaching his brother.

"Correction, I was." Riku calmly said with his eyes still on Sora, "I thought we could rebuild our relationship, big brother." He turned to look at Sephiroth now, "But apparently, you're the one who hasn't changed. You're still a traitor and you've manipulated the only person I've ever loved."

"Look at him!" Sephiroth whispered, "He only loves you."

"Then what are you doing here?" Riku narrowed his eyes, "In my room? With him?"

Sephiroth didn't answer, not wanting to aggravate the situation by saying that he was here comforting Sora because of his brother's behaviour.

"He was here because I asked him to." Sora whispered, "I needed some help."

"And you couldn't have got turned to me?" Riku whispered back to him, "You had to stab me in the back with him?"

"No, you don't understand…" Sora whimpered, shaking his head.

"I think I do, Sora…" Riku softly said, shaking his head. "Apparently, I'm not needed here."

With that he turned around and left.

* * *

_To be continued..._

**_-BDP-_**


	7. Exit wound

**_Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday to me! _**

**_Hi everyone! How is everyone holding up? Well, I hope :-)_**

**_Here's the next chapter and I'm kind of afraid as to your reactions to it... Ah well, I'll worry about that later. As for now, on with the chapter, which I made extra long because it's my birthday!_**

* * *

SEVEN: Exit wound

* * *

"Riku no!"

Sephiroth had wanted to hold the little brunette back, but Sora wriggled himself out of the elder man's grip. He ran out of the room and saw Riku descend the stairs.

"Riku, stop!"

Riku didn't give ear to what the other was saying and stubbornly continued his way down.

Feelings of exasperation and hurt grew stronger in Sora, transforming into searing rage. Long enough he had shown patience to Riku's behaviour and everyone had a breaking point and Sora had just reached his.

"Riku goddamnit! I told you to stop!" He yelled out angrily, making the silver haired young man stop dead in his tracks and look up at him with a surprised gaze. Sora didn't care if he seemed extremely angry now, that stupid bastard deserved it. There was no way he was going to feel guilty about this one, how dared he even walk out on him like this!

The brunette descended the few steps Riku had and halted just in front of him, his face contorted with rage. The next thing Riku knew was that he was looking at the wall left from him after Sora had made his right cheek connect with his left fist. No need to say that he was surprised, to say the least.

"How dare you!" Sora yelled at him, "How dare you come in at the end of a conversation and think you know everything that has been told!"

Riku was holding his sore cheek now, his mouth slightly open. It actually hurt. A lot.

"And I can't believe you would even think of me cheating on you!" Sora raged on, not caring if Riku had gotten silent and was now looking at him with a guilty expression. "Haven't I proven to you how much I love your sorry ass!"

Sora fell silent after that, holding back the tears stinging behind his eyelids again. He wouldn't show them this time, he refused to cry over this. He sighed sadly instead and faced away from Riku. "You have no idea how much you've hurt me, Riku. No idea."

A long moment of silence followed that while Sora waited for Riku to say something in his defence. Not receiving any reply whatsoever, Sora bit on his lower lip, trying desperately to keep himself from crying and walked back up the stairs without casting a last look on Riku still standing where he had left him.

As Sora entered their room,Riku could hear the soft sobs he was trying to muffle beneath his right hand.

Closing his eyes in deep regret at how stupid he had been and the amount of hurt he had caused the only person that had always stuck by his side, Riku slumped down against the wall of the staircase and sat down on one of the steps close to him.

Nothing,_ nothing_ had ever felt like this before. He felt helpless and didn't know how things were going to go next between them, if there was even going to be a 'them' after this...

Could he have done something to prevent this? Most likely. Sora wouldn't have got punched him if he had been just upset with him, no. Sora was furious and disappointed in him, he had been patient with him and Riku still let him down.

He wanted to tell him that he was sorry, that he promised that it wouldn't happen again, but he figured that part of the problem lied there.

_"Don't promise me, Riku. Just don't do it."_

The time when he could've got promised Sora anything was long gone, he realised that more than ever now. They were older, the world around them had changed and so had their romantic lives. As much as he hated to admit it, that was the scariest thing to him. He didn't know how to handle that. If Sora's needs were to change suddenly, would he still be able to please him? Would Sora keep exercising his patience and give him his love if he didn't get fulfilment to his needs?

Losing Sora was his worst nightmare, but he knew that the brunette had already started to slip away from his grip. And he didn't know what to do to hold on to him. He was afraid that if he went to talk to him now, he'd only end up making things worse. He couldn't stand the idea that he was actually making Sora unhappy, and yet that was the reason why he was sitting there...

"If you don't want to make an effort to save what's still left of your relationship, you'll end up regretting it for the rest of your life."

Riku looked up and found Sephiroth standing next to the now closed door of their room.

The taller man did not receive any response from the other, not that he had even expected any. He knew his brother better than people often gave him credit for. To him, Riku was easy to read, yet difficult to knock sense into. Still, he knew that everyone had someone who could really get through to them and for Riku that person was Sora. The little brunette had done good to give Riku that wake-up call, seen the fact that he hadn't seem to realise that his relationship with him had been on the point of shipwrecking completely. At least now, they still had a chance to make it up. Yet, as said before, Sephiroth knew his brother well enough and he knew that Riku would need an extra push in the right direction.

Their mutual issues set aside; he descended a few steps before stopping. "Sora needs you in there."

Riku kept staring straight ahead of him, not giving his brother a glance, not saying a word.

Sephiroth pursed his lips and breathed in deeply. "You can't give up. Not on him."

Riku scowled at that. "What's it to you?"

"Nothing." He simply replied, putting his hands in the pockets of his loose pants. "I'm just preventing this to turn into a pattern."

"Right." Riku nonchalantly spoke, not giving a damn.

"Do it once, it's a coincidence. Do it twice, it's a motive. Three times is a pattern." Sephiroth said, moving to lean with his right shoulder against the wall next to him.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"About you, little brother." Sephiroth said with a small smile. "You are a perfectionist. When things don't go the way you want them to go, you give up on them. You're about to make your relationship with Sora strike three when there's isn't even that big of a problem between you two."

Riku's scowl grew deeper and he turned his face away from him. "You don't know anything about us." Who the hell did Sephiroth think he was? What right did he think to have, butting in like this? "You don't even know me." He spat, looking at him now. Riku stood up and added venomously with a slight mocking tone, "Big brother." With that he turned to descend the stairs.

"Then why are you running, Riku?" Sephiroth said after him. "Giving up?"

This made Riku stop and turn back to face him. "You don't know shit about me!"

Sephiroth only smirked, "Then by al means, please prove me wrong." He gestured to the door were Sora had disappeared through, his smirk now gone and his face expressing a seriousness Riku had never witnessed on his brother before.

His mouth opened and closed several times, but not a word came out. He just stood there, fighting an internal conflict with himself. If he went downstairs, he would prove his brother right, if he went into his room, he would prove him right too, indirectly. But, he quickly realised, this wasn't about proving Sephiroth wrong or right, this was about saving what was left over of his relationship with Sora. Or not.

He then remembered how well Sephiroth had always done in his psychology class...

His decision was written on his face as he looked at his brother and said last one gave one brief nod in acknowledgment and turned himself around, walked up the stairs to the second floor again and retreated himself into his room on the third.

Riku took a breath and closed his eyes, gathering the courage he needed to face Sora. This maybe was going to be his last chance.

* * *

Sora was sitting on the edge of his side of the bed, holding his face in his hands in utter despair. He didn't know what to do anymore, all was lost for sure. He removed his hands from his face and wiped away the tears that had found their way down his cheeks. For a few moments he simply sat there, feeling tired and useless. What would happen now? What would he do? Return home? Back to the Destiny Islands? 

He sighed sorrowfully as he thought about the many years he had known Riku and the love they had shared with each other ever since they had gotten together. They had known back then that it had been a gamble, that exchanging their friendship for a romantic relationship would include many risks. And still he had chosen for it. He had chosen to be with Riku.

So many things had changed since that summer two years ago... He had left his home, entered college and moved away with his boyfriend. Sora knew for sure that those past two years and a half had been the happiest years of his life, even with the bumps they had met on the road. They had always found a way around them, always found a solution to their problems.

His eyes fell upon the picture he kept beside his bed of him and Riku. He picked it up and studied it, running his left hand over the silver frame.

It was one of the pictures they had gotten done in a studio. Riku had given him a photo shoot session for his birthday last year and he had particularly liked this shot. It was a close up of the both of them facing each other. Riku had been talking to him softly, the back of his right hand was caressing Sora's left cheek, but only his fingertips were visible from behind Sora's face. Sora was looking up at him with a soft amorous smile. It was the aspect of spontaneity that he liked most about the picture; the photographer hadn't told them to take poses. It remembered Sora of how spontaneous and easy it was for him to love Riku, or rather, how easy it had been... The soft old pink colour that was worked into the picture only reminded him of that period when he felt like he was walking on roses all the time.

A tear fell on top of the glass and he held it close to his chest.

"Oh Riku..."

He didn't hear the door open softly as he wept further, holding on to the picture, holding on to that past he so wanted back.

"Sora."

With a startled sob Sora looked up. "Riku..."

Riku took a few steps inside the room after he had closed the door and approached him slowly. "Babe, I..." He started, but fell silent... not knowing how to continue.

Sora was looking up at him as he stood there, feeling his unease. There was only one thing he needed from Riku right now. He placed the picture next to him on the bed, stood up and threw his arms around him.

Riku immediately returned the embrace and held him tightly to him. "I'm so sorry! Please forgive me, Sora. I—"

"Riku," Sora whispered over his left shoulder with his eyes closed, a tear rolling out of his right eye. It wasn't that he didn't want to accept Riku's most sincere apologies, but it wasn't fair that he only knew part of the story for which he was apologising for. "Can... Can we talk?"

Riku loosened his grip on him and nodded. He sat himself opposite from Sora on the bed and watched him pick up the picture he had been holding earlier and place it back on his nightstand. Riku only seemed patient and calm on the outside, but was internally as nervous as Sora felt. Sora didn't blame him, this conversation could go either well or bad and their relationship was at stake.

"I really want this to come out right..." Sora whispered softly, looking at his hands in his lap. "Riku... You need to know first that I don't want to lose you. But I need to say this before I go and say more things or do more things I'll regret later." He reached out to Riku's right cheekbone gently and bit his lower lip at the bruise forming there.

Riku took his hand touching his face and kissed his palm lovingly. "Just go on."

Sora took a steadying breath and nodded slightly. "You're the guy that has captured my heart and swept me off my feet…" He chuckled softly at the smile Riku gave him. "You've made me feel things I never possibly could've imagined feeling." He paused and gave him a weak, nervous smile as he intertwined their fingers. Riku returned the smile, wanting him to know that he was there, listening to him.

Sora bit his lower lip and continued. "I love you. So much." He paused again, closing his eyes. "So much, that I'm ready to do anything to please you." He opened his eyes and found comfort and encouragement in the soft azure ones looking at him with so much love. He knew he could tell Riku everything, he wanted him to know everything, but it was just so damn _hard_.

Especially now…

"But at times," Sora whispered, trailing his eyes away from Riku's. "I forget about myself… and I end up feeling unhappy, because… because I love you to such extend that I cannot refuse you anything out of fear of losing your love…"

Riku thought about these words for a few moments. What Sora had disclosed to him showed once more how insecure and emotionally fragile he was. And then, suddenly, pieces of the scrambled puzzle started to fall in place.

How could he have been that blind?

All the times Sora gave in when _he_ wanted sex, all the times Sora would crawl back from a dispute… He would just take the advantage and assume it was okay with Sora, thinking he wanted whatever he wanted as well. Sora would never contradict him just so _he'd_ get things he wanted them…

He was starting to wonder why Sora hadn't left him by now.

If he had felt guilty before, then the feeling sure came back a 1000 times stronger right that moment. How could he be worthy of Sora, asshole that he was?

To what extend was Sora supposed to suffer just because he loved him?

He let go of the hand he had intertwined with Sora's.

"You're right; I have no idea how much pain I've caused you, Sora… God, I'm so sorry…" He whispered, drawing back his hand and shaking his head as Sora had attempted to take hold of it again. "No… Love shouldn't be like this. It's not what I wanted for us. It's not what I wanted for you." He shook his head again to stress his words and stood up from the bed.

Sora stood in turn and reached out to him again, taking his right hand in his. Despite the situation, he could feel his heart swell with love. Riku would never hurt him intentionally; he had proven this again by showing so much remorse for what he didn't realise he had been doing. He could see the pain he felt in his teary eyes, those soft pools of aqua reflecting deep guilt and shame.

He placed the hand he had taken in his on his chest, right above his heart and looked up at him with a smile. "Do you feel it beating?"

Riku closed his eyes and a lonely tear fell from his right eye as he nodded softly. The fast-paced, steady heartbeat of Sora's heart drummed underneath the palm of his hand and in his ears. He felt like he was being washed over by a wave of emotions coming from Sora, his Sora.

"It's beating just for you, beating hard and proudly because it belongs to you." Sora said, trying with all his might to keep his voice steady while watching with tears in his own eyes as Riku bent his head and shook it slightly. "And I swear that it'll stop forever on the day that you no longer will want to receive my love."

Riku was still shaking his head, his tears rolling in transparent pearls the long his face now. "I don't deserve you, Sora." He whispered sadly. "You deserve so much more than me…"

"Who says that!" Sora spoke with a trembling voice, not wanting to see his Riku like this. He placed his hands on either side of Riku's face, trying to make him look at him. "Who says that!" He whimpered, partly mad at himself for not showing more strength and partly at Riku because he was giving up on them. "Riku!" He shook his head violently, his own tears flowing now. He tried to make Riku look at him. "Please, don't give up! Don't give up on me!"

Riku looked at him now, staring at that tear streaked face of his boyfriend with a pained expression. "Sora…"

"Don't!" Sora sternly spoke through his tears, finding his anger back now and stubbornly shaking his head. "Don't you _dare_!" He hit with his fists on Riku's chest now, his pain and sorrow taking the upper hand of his feelings again. "Don't you dare! I need you!"

Riku closed his eyes at the heart-wrenching sobs of Sora and the weakening hits against his chest. He couldn't come up with the strength of saying anything. He simply didn't want them to go on like this. He needed Sora as much as Sora needed him, but he couldn't stand seeing him hurt. Especially not now that he was the cause of his pain.

Sora was simply crying now, searching for Riku to hold him, tell him that he wouldn't leave, but his hands gripping against the fabric of Riku's black shirt never received an answer whatsoever. "I need you…" He sobbed desperately, falling on his knees now and letting out a cry of frustration and pain.

Riku got on his knees too and took Sora in his arms, holding him tightly to him as he continued to cry, the reality finally settling in for the both of them.

They weren't going to get out of this one.

Riku held him for a long time, just holding him even though he knew that no amount of comfort he offered would ease Sora's pain.

Finally, Sora let go of him, his arms falling limply at his sides. He wasn't looking at Riku anymore, his eyes -swollen and red from the many tears- directed to the side as he sat there on his knees, his face calm now as he spoke. "So what do we do now?"

Riku looked up at him, but did not answer. He extended his right hand to touch Sora's left cheek, but Sora only closed his eyes and turned his face away from his touch.

"Will you at least stay for Christmas?" Sora softly whispered. He was trying hard to not cry right now, trying so damn hard.

"If you want me to stay, I'll stay." Riku gently spoke back.

Sora bit his lower lip and looked up at the ceiling, wanting to keep his tears from falling down his cheeks again. "But it's not about what I want, is it?" He said, his voice trembling. He laid his teary gaze back on him, not caring anymore if the tears he had tried to hold back rolled down his face now. "If you want to stay, stay. But don't stay because of me."

Before Riku could reply, Sora stood up and crawled into the bed, facing away from him.

Riku bent his head and closed his eyes, trying to fight the urge to run up to him and hold him in his arms.

It was over and nothing was ever going to be the same again.

Ever.

He forced himself to stand and turn away from Sora's lying form. With his heart feeling like lead inside of his chest he slowly walked out, half and half hoping that Sora would hold him back, but by the time he was out of the door and ready to close it he was still hoping.

The door finally closed itself and that's when Sora sat up in his bed to find the emptiness of the room looking back at him. He let himself fall back on his pillow, crawling himself into a foetus position, wanting the pain to go away, wanting his tears to stop falling from his eyes, wanting Riku to tell him everything was going to be okay. Wanting him to tell him how much he loved him and how they'd be together for ever.

The sun would be kissing his face before he finally realised that the nightmare he had landed himself into was very real and still ongoing.

* * *

The hot bowl of onion soup was slowly turning cold. 

"You need to eat something, Sora." Kairi whispered, looking at her friend with a worried gaze. She threw her right arm over his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him, but Sora didn't even move.

He was simply staring ahead of him, sitting with his legs pulled up against his body on the right couch in the lounge. From time to time there would be a tear that left one of his eyes or he would blink, but next to that the brunette didn't move and hadn't spoken a word.

Kairi stroked a few of his locks behind an ear, not knowing what she could do to help anymore. She looked up when she heard the front door open itself and Wakka, Leon and Cloud walked into the welcoming hall.

"Anything?"

Cloud shook his head, taking his black bonnet off. "It's not likely that he's left town. All his stuff is still here."

"And it was snowing pretty hard last night, he couldn't have gotten far." Leon added.

Wakka nodded and Kairi stood up to walk over to him with a worried face. "He still hasn't eaten?"

Kairi shook her head sadly. "He hasn't said a word either."

"Poor dude… Where is Riku, goddamnit…?" Wakka whispered, taking Kairi in his arms.

"I really hate to see him like this. I never thought this would happen." Kairi softy said.

Leon placed his arm around Cloud's shoulders and pulled him to him. Cloud placed his arms around Leon's waist while he looked at Sora sitting there in the lounge by himself, unmoving. "This is so sad…"

Leon pressed a kiss on his head and held him close. "We'll go search again later." He said, turning around to go walk up the stairs.

Cloud nodded and followed him close behind.

"Why would they have got broken up?" Kairi wondered, laying her head on Wakka's right shoulder. "I thought everything was okay between them…"

"I don't know, babe. I don't know…" Wakka whispered back.

Kairi sniffled a little and wiped away the starters of her tears out of her eyes. "I need to go make dinner."

Wakka nodded and followed her into the kitchen.

Another tear found its way down Sora's right cheek.

* * *

It was the loud howling of the wind that woke him up. 

"Riku?"

"Shhh, it's just the wind, go back to sleep."

A comforting arm slid around his waist and he snuggled closer to him, enveloping himself in the fresh scent of his silken soft hair and soon finding sleep again.

The loud howling of the raging snowstorm outside woke him up again.

"Riku?"

Silence.

He slid his hand over the spot next to him and touched but the covers. There was no one lying beside him in the large bed. It had been but a dream.

The red digits of Riku's bedside clock indicated 11.37 pm.

Tired of feeling sad and lonely, Sora threw the covers off of him and got out of the bed; put his boots underneath the jeans he was still wearing and pulled a warm sweater over his shirt. He got out of his room and descended the stairs all the way to the main floor. The lounge and the dinner room were abandoned, everyone had gone to bed. He walked over to the small vestibule and took his winter coat from one of the many hooks on the wall and put it on. He then searched for Cloud's jacket and took out his car keys. With those in his hands, he re-entered the welcoming hall and took the door right from the stairs leading into the underground garage.

A few minutes later he was riding into the cold, dark night.

* * *

The silver tags in his hands shimmered as they caught the lights coming from the spots above him. He had been staring at them for a good half an hour now, as if the words inscribed on them would make his sorrow go away if he just kept staring at them long enough. 

Sora had given him the necklace with the dog tags two years and a half ago, when they had just gotten together. A promise had been written on them, words of a young boy madly in love with him and who just didn't know better at the time.

"Heart troubles?"

Riku looked up, shaken out of his thoughts, his eyes falling on the bar tender, who refilled his glass of whiskey-peg. He tucked the tags back underneath his jacket and took the glass of whiskey. "It's all in the past now." He said and took a large sip of his drink to only wince at the strong alcoholic taste.

"Nasty break up?" The other guy asked, now drying a glass for beer with a towel.

Riku sighed, suddenly feeling extremely tired. He placed the tip of his fingers on his temples and rubbed softly, trying to stop the upcoming wave of migraine. "I almost wish it had been, so it would've been easier, but..." He sighed again and looked at the other guy.

"No break up is ever easy." He replied with a sympathetic smile, shrugging slightly.

For a minute there Riku thought he was hallucinating.

It was a striking resemblance.

"Hey, have you seen a ghost or something?" He chuckled, looking behind him curiously.

Riku simply watched him, taking in all the small details of this stranger who looked so much like Sora.

The same blue eyes, almost the same form of face and almost the same figure, only Sora was a tad shorter than him and was a brunette, whereas this guy was blond. Even the clothing style came near to Sora's. Baggy pants and close fitting tops.

"What is it?" He asked again, giving Riku a slightly amused smile.

Riku blinked and tore his face away from his. "What did you say your name was?"

He chuckled. "I didn't. But seen as how you're dying to know, it's Roxas."

Riku closed his eyes, cursing himself for letting his mind wander towards his ex again. He shuddered mentally at that. 'Ex' was such a final word.

Roxas pursed his lips as he looked at this beautiful stranger, feeling a wave of sympathy for him. Many people came to this bar late at night, many with problems of all sorts. This was just another one of those burned souls, he figured.

"So do you mind returning the favour?"

What? Oh. Riku forced a smile and turned to look at him again. "Riku. My name is Riku."

"Nice to meet you, Riku." Roxas politely greeted, placing the glass he was holding next to the other ones of its kind on the shelves behind him. "So when did you guys break up?"

"Last night." He answered, feeling like he needed someone to talk to. Slightly nodding at the fatality of it all, he continued, "We've know each other our whole lives, but we got together almost three years ago."

Roxas nodded in understanding. "What went wrong then?"

"It's just wasn't working anymore." Riku softly said, staring into his glass. "I was doing him more harm than good."

"Did he break up with you?"

"No, I think that was my doing." Riku said, raising his hand, pleading guilty.

"You didn't want to hurt him more."

Riku nodded and took another sip of his whiskey.

"What did he say?"

"At first he was angry." He whispered, biting his lower lip, a sad look coming on his face. "Then he just broke down, crying."

"He didn't want to let you go." Roxas whispered, leaning with his elbows on the bar while looking at him.

"But it was for his own good. I couldn't remain in a relationship where all I did was hurting the one I love?" Riku quietly spoke.

Roxas pursed his lips again; contemplating what Riku had said and gave him a demi-nod. "Yeah... true. But you must've done something good in your relationship if your boyfriend still wanted you to stay?"

"But it doesn't add up against the pain I've cause him." Riku stubbornly spoke.

"By the way you sound, it's almost like you're searching for a reason to justify what you did." Roxas said, with a questioning eyebrow.

Riku frowned at him. "What? I love Sora, but I won't keep hurting him."

"Okay." Roxas spoke, surrendering. "Yet you still love him, Riku. And Sora wants to be with you. I honestly don't even see where the problem between you two is."

Riku gave him a sceptical look. "So now what? You think you're a shrink now?" He turned his back to him and emptied his glass. "You sound like my brother."

"Well maybe your brother is right. The only problem I see right now, is you." Roxas said, shrugging. "You're so afraid of failing Sora that you won't even try and change the things you did wrong in the past. But instead, you went and just broke up with him, because of your own fears, not because you didn't want to hurt him. That was just a lame excuse."

Riku turned himself around again, not believing this guy. He wanted to reply to him, but Roxas had gone to the back of the bar to pick up some supplies. He grunted and got off his stool, leaving some money for the drink before getting out of the bar.

Afraid, yeah, right. He had just done what he thought had been right for both Sora and him; there was no point in continuing a relationship where Sora would only end up hurting.

Yet a small voice in the back of his head wondered if he hadn't caused Sora more pain by breaking up with him last night.

He shook his head, refusing the idea. Sora would be better off without him once he would realise that it was for the best.

But would he be alright? Would Sora be alright?

Riku sighed and closed his eyes as he now stood right in front of his car. They had known each other for over 19 years now. How could one just break off all contact with someone after such a large lapse of time together? Wouldn't such a relationship leave its imprint on their lives? On Sora's life? On his?

Would _he_ be alright?

No.

He wouldn't.

He had barely slept all night, his thoughts still lingering on Sora as they had had all day. He couldn't think of anything else, of anyone else. He had been too proud to admit it to himself, too stubborn to see that he indeed could've got fixed things between them without having to end them. All he had had to do was...

_Make an effort._

Do the changes he had promised Sora so many times before and work out their problems like they had in the past.

Maybe love wasn't all about fun and laughter, but it needed work, and Sora hadn't been supposed to make theirs subsist on his own in the first place.

He _had_ given up.

He had made Sora strike two and their relationship strike three.

Sephiroth had been strike one.

"Shit...!" Riku cursed against himself, bringing his hands on his head. How could he have got done this? How could he ever have thought that he would be able to survive without Sora? How had he even gotten to that? Sora was his life, he couldn't live without him.

He jumped into his car immediately, driving back to the chalet in a hurry, hoping he wasn't too late.

* * *

Sora closed the door of the car and locked it. 

This was the last bar he had to go check into tonight. The last bar before exiting Crystle via the interstate. His last chance to find Riku.

The wind was beating around his ears and he pulled his coat closer around him, looking at the big red neon lights on top of the building.

_**"Deep Dive"**_

Sora sighed and quickly entered, praying for Riku to be there.

The bar was almost rid of costumers; only a small group of older men were sitting in a corner, drinking their beverages and laughing loudly with each other. No sign of Riku again.

Feeling discouraged, Sora sat himself on one of the stools at the bar feeling another wave of sorrow threatening to wash over him.

"Riku please... where are you?" He softly whispered to himself, feeling himself getting tired now.

"What can I get you?" A friendly masculine voice asked him.

Sora raised his head from where it had been lying on his folded arms and looked at the proprietor of the voice.

A young guy with friendly blue eyes and short, spiky blond hair was standing there, waiting to receive his order.

Sora shook his head and friendly smiled at him. "I don't need anything, thank you."

"You look tired. Are you sure that I can't help?"

Sora's smile widened itself a little and he shook his head again. "I'm just going to go. The person I was looking for isn't here."

Sora got off the stool and prepared himself to exit, when the bar tender called him back again.

"What does he look like? Maybe he's been here today?"

Sora turned around, deciding to give it a shot. Even if he hadn't real high hopes for it. "He's tall and has hair the colour of silver that reaches just past his shoulders and blue-greenish eyes. His name is—"

"Riku." The other interrupted him with a smile.

Sora felt his heart light up and ran back to the bar. "Yes! Has he been here?"

"He has, not so long ago either. You must be Sora?"

The brunette nodded, feeling tears forming in his eyes. "Do you know where he is now?"

The other sadly shook his head. "No, I'm sorry."

Sora sighed in disappointment. "Okay, thank you anyways."

"I hope you find him." The bar tender called after him as he watched him exit. The door closed and he sighed sadly to himself. "What a shame."

"Yo Roxas! We're going to 'Oblivion' care to join us? You don't have any costumers anymore, so let's go." Said one of the guys that had been sitting in one of the corners of the bar with his friends. "So you can show me those dancing skills of yours." He added with a sly smile.

Roxas only gave him an uninterested look before returning to washing the remaining dirty glasses. "Not tonight, Axel. I got to close up."

The redhead stood up from his seat and his friends followed suit. "Well then I guess I'll have that cute ass of yours next time."

Roxas only rolled his eyes at the kiss Axel sent his way and was glad to see the small group leave.

* * *

Sora was bent over the driver's door of the car, trying to reorganise his thoughts. Where could Riku be? Where could he go look for him now? 

He didn't notice the small group of 4 guys approaching him from behind. "Well, well. What do we have here?" One of them called out to him.

Sora turned, figuring that since there wasn't anyone left in the small parking lot than him that the question was to his address.

A guy with fiery red hair walked up to him, flanked by his three friends. He approached Sora and laid a hand on the car roof of the 4x4, obstructing Sora's way inside the car.

Sora took a step back and bumped into one of the other guys. He was encircled.

"Aren't you a pretty little thing?" The man standing behind him whispered in his ear, making cold sweat run down Sora's back.

"What do you want?" Sora asked, not liking the gazes he received from these men.

The one with the red hair laughed. "Just something to warm us up with…"

Sora could hear his heart drumming in his ears as they closed in on him. He didn't even get the chance to scream for help as a hand suddenly came to cover his mouth and another took hold of his wrists. He screamed as loudly as he could, but nothing but a mere murmur escaped from underneath the hand covering his lips. He trashed wildly around him, trying desperately to free himself from those hands holding him captive until he felt something cold, sharp and flat pressing against the skin of his throat.

"Make another move and you'll be breathing through the new hole I'll make in your throat."

He froze, eyes opened wide in terror, breath coming rapidly as ice cold fear grabbed hold of him now. Tears were stinging behind his eyes and his breath caught in his throat when, with a rough movement, he got bent over the cap of his car, his head hitting the black surface hard.

He couldn't move. Hands were running up and down his buttocks, feeling him up through the fabric of his denims, making him shudder in horror.

This wasn't happening, this wasn't happening… This was NOT happening!

Ragged breathing sounded in his ear as he felt a hand unbuckling and unzipping his pants. Sora shook his head frantically, sobbing and screaming at the top of his lungs now, but to no avail.

"I wonder if he's tight…" One of them hungrily spoke, making all others laugh darkly.

Sheer panic gripped Sora's heart as the tears blurred his vision and he gave a loud frightened cry.

Then, as by a miracle, the hand on his lips got removed and just as he was about to cry for help again, a piece of rolled up cloth got shoved into his mouth, nearly making him choke.

"Can't wait to fuck him, hurry up Axel!"

The one named Axel bent over Sora with a maniacal grin, sliding his right hand inside Sora's pants now and pulling him closer to his aroused member that was still concealed in his pants. "But our friend here needs to inspect our goods first now, doesn't he?"

The brunette's tears were running continuously over his cheeks, his breath coming in quick gasps now, his muffled whimpers barely audible in the cold, cold night. Axel's hand were skimming over his most intimate parts now, teasingly touching and squeezing while Sora felt the large bulge in his pants pressed firmly against his buttocks.

Sora lost all hope when he felt his pants and boxers slide down his legs, his butt now in open air, and a tongue lick his left jawbone lustfully. Then the pressure on his back got relieved and his heart stopped beating altogether as he heard the distinct sound of many zippers sliding open. He shut his eyes tightly, bracing himself for what was to come.

That's when two loud gunshots were heard in the middle of night.

* * *

_**If you review, I'll update faster. -Grins evilly- I'll only update when I'll be satisfied with a certain amount of reviews.**_

_To be continued..._

**_-BDP-_**


	8. Breathe again

Haha! I'm back! And yes, I was pleased with the amount of reviews, thank you for the support. Now let's continue where we left off, shall we?

_**-Blackdiamond Princess**_

* * *

EIGHT: Breathe again

* * *

"Let's have a taste of your nice little ass here, shall we?"

Sora only closed his eyes, feeling all hope lost now. He was going to get gang-raped and no one would hear nor come and save him from this cruel fate.

Four zippers slid open, one by one and his heart stopped its frantic beating, seized with a nauseating fear, his eyes flying open in shock.

Axel then bent over again and pressed his lips against Sora's left ear, his voice low and barely holding back his growing excitement. "I'll make you forget about that guy you were looking for, rest assure. And if you co-operate, you might even like it…" He chuckled in his ear, his hand crawling back around Sora's waist and pressing against his lower belly, lifting his hips to allow him better access.

Sora whimpered weakly and closed his eyes, his body feeling completely limp, his only option bracing himself for what was to come.

Two gunshots suddenly went off in the silence of the frigid night.

"Shit!" The redhead cursed underneath his breath, letting go of his prey and looking in bewilderment in the direction of the heard shots.

Sora gasped in fright, his eyes tightly shut once more. What was next? Some crazy guy with a gun, shooting bullets all around them?

"Oh fuck, it's the old man!" One of the other three whispered in an agitated voice, fumbling with his pants while trying to run at the same time.

Sora's heart was racing at 200 km an hour; his eyes wide open again at the sounds of nearing footsteps and the recreant retreat of the four rapists.

"Next time I'll make sure to blow your head off, you sick bastard!"

Sora was trembling now. Not because of the cold, but because his body didn't seem to be able to take the next overdose of fear. He felt his knees give out on his body as he tried to push himself up against the car with his hands that were now free.

Another pair of cold hands caught him before his body hit the snowy ground and instinctively, he tried to wriggle away from them, whimpering cowardly not able to bear the feeling of foreign hands on his body anymore.

"Hey! Hey kid! I won't hurt you!" A gruff voice softly spoke to him, holding his hands captive in one of his while taking off the gag keeping him from talking.

Sora only whimpered now, tired of this, tired of people keeping him captive, not wanting to let him go. "Please no... Let me go… Please…" He sobbed softly, shaking his head desperately.

He was barely aware of a warm coat that came to cover his still naked body parts and of those same pair of cold hands lifting him up, carrying him back into the bar.

* * *

"We're closed, please come back tomor— Dad!" Roxas came from behind the bar with a worried gaze as he saw his father walk inside the bar with a young man in his arms that he recognised as the brunette that left just 5 minutes ago. "What happened?" He questioned as Sora was put on a chair, his face wet from tears. He was also trembling uncontrollably as he sat there with his eyes closed.

"Roxas, go get a warm blanket." The older man said, attending to Sora's state of shock.

Roxas nodded and hurriedly disappeared behind the door at the back of the bar.

"Now kid," Roxas' father softly spoke towards Sora, avoiding any physical contact with the brunette seen as it only seemed to upset him further. "What's your name?"

Sora didn't answer and shook his head, his tears continuously flowing down his cheeks. In his mind, he couldn't shake the horrible feeling of those creeping hands all over his body.

Roxas came back with a green woollen blanket and handed it over to his father, his eyes resting on Sora with growing worry. "Dad, what happened? He left the bar only 5 minutes ago."

"What happened was that you once again didn't listen to me, Roxas! You let that scum of ex-boyfriend of yours into the bar, when I specifically asked you not to." The older man calmly yet angrily spoke, putting the blanket over Sora's shoulders.

"Dad, I—"

"We'll discuss the matter later."

Roxas sighed in remorse and nodded, looking at Sora with pained eyes. "Did he…?"

"No, he didn't. I got there just in time." His father answered, smiling a little as he saw Sora calm down a little. "Makes me wonder why a young boy like him was doing wandering so far away from town."

Sora sighed, feeling like he could trust these people, his fear subsiding little by little. He gave the blonde man talking to him a small thankful smile, but didn't trust his voice enough to speak. His eyes then met with the young man he had spoken to before and could see the guilt he felt for what had nearly happened outside.

"His name is Sora, dad." Roxas whispered, getting his father's attention. "He and his boyfriend have been looking for each other all night and he came in just then minutes after his boyfriend left."

His father glanced at him questioningly.

"Don't ask; it's a long story." Roxas said, giving Sora a small comforting smile.

"I need to find him." Sora almost inaudibly whispered, already taking off the blanket from his shoulders so he could stand.

Roxas' father shook his head sternly and held him down by holding back his left hand. "What you need is a good night of sleep after what almost happened to you out there. Where do you live?"

Sora sat back down on his chair, his fatigue coming through now that his fear had gone. He sighed in realisation that he would have to spend another night without Riku by his side and tried to fight back the upcoming tears again. "Snow Lake Hill." He whispered, closing his eyes.

"Hn. I know the man who owns that place." The blonde man said, sitting back in his chair, eying Sora questioningly and lighting up a cigarette. "Sephiroth Makoto."

Sora frowned slightly, wondering how this man knew that the chalet on Snow Lake Hill was property of the Makoto brothers.

"Who is he?" Roxas wondered.

The other man huffed. "He's only the most loaded son of a bitch in town right now. I'm surprised he didn't tell me he was back." He then laughed and stood up, taking out his portable out of the leather jacket he wore. "The bastard." He pressed in a speed-dial and held the device against his right ear. "I'll ask if he can come and pick you up, he's an old friend of mine, he knows the place."

As he walked over to the back of the bar to make the phone call, Roxas sat himself on the seat his father had previously sat on. "Feel a little better?" He asked the brunette with a soft smile.

Sora averted his eyes before closing them. "I've felt better…"

Roxas nodded in understanding and sighed. "I'm sorry for what happened to you out there."

Sora looked at him for a few moments, not knowing what to say to him exactly. Roxas wasn't really to blame for what his ex-boyfriend did, right? He shouldn't be beating himself up over something he didn't cause. "I'm just grateful your dad was there before those guys had their way with me…" He took a breath and closed his eyes again.

"Mm." Roxas nodded again, slightly feeling more at ease now, though he still couldn't shake the feeling that it somehow was his fault.

"There, it's done kiddo. He's coming to pick you up." Roxas' father said, walking back into the room. "It looks like you caused quite a commotion with your little disappearing act."

"Thank you, sir. For everything. "Sora softly said, bending his head in gratitude.

"Just call me Cid, kid. Besides, it was the least I could do to keep that low-life from attacking you." Cid replied, crossing his arms over his chest. "That Axel has taken it too far this time…"

Sora nodded, his eyes turning to Roxas still sitting on the chair next to him. There was a silent sadness and hidden pain in the eyes he had directed to the floor. It was obvious that Roxas still had feelings for Axel. Yet that wasn't a reason to forgive what the guy did. "Ok, thank you Cid."

"It's alright, my boy." He gruffly spoke, taking another drag from his cigarette. "But just out of curiosity, what's your relation to Makoto anyways?"

"Riku, his brother is— was my boyfriend. We were spending our winter holidays here." Sora whispered, trying to ignore the sting he felt in heart because of the use of the past tense in his words.

"Oh…" Cid nodded. "I see." He didn't need a sketched out picture of what happened between him and his boyfriend and now he understood better what had driven him outside at this late hour. "Sometimes, the best way to find back what has been lost is to just wait for it to come back again."

He gave Sora a comforting smile and the brunette could feel a surge of hope inside of him, making him return the smile. Someone had told him something similar a couple of days ago and it had proven itself to be true…

Maybe everything wasn't lost just yet.

* * *

All lights in the chalet were out by the time Sephiroth's silver Mercedes drove up the driveway and came to a stop in front of the house.

Sora got out of the car, but couldn't seem to be able to take another step.

Cloud and Sephiroth had come to get him, Cloud had driven his own car back to the chalet and Sora had taken the passenger seat in Sephiroth's.

While Cloud had gone straight back to the chalet, Sephiroth had taken Sora to the nearest police office to file a complaint against those who had assaulted him. It had been emotionally hard on him to bring up all of these events again, especially after it only happened a few hours back, but Sora had wanted it to be done and over with. He had only wanted to get back into his bed and forget it ever happened. Forget that the last two days ever happened.

Yet there he stood, looking at his feet, unable to take another step. He had told himself that he wouldn't let his mind take him to what he was thinking now. And yet, there he was, thinking it.

It was all Riku's fault.

No matter how much he didn't want to think of him that way, he just couldn't. It was his fault that he had been such a wreck because he broke up with him; it was his fault that he had left the house in the middle of the night to go look for him. It was his fault he went into that bar, his fault he almost—

"Let's get inside, Sora." Sephiroth's gentle voice spoke to him before he heard the door of the driver's seat fall shut and the car beeping twice as the alarm got enabled.

He hadn't told Sephiroth or Cloud anything, he hadn't even said a word to them the whole time. His desire to see Riku had now melted like snow before the sun, the feelings of hope he had had for their reconciliation now almost gone. The mere thought of Riku right now just made his stomach turn over.

As soon as Sephiroth closed the door of the house behind them as they walked in, a lamp in the lounge room got lit up and they both saw Riku walk up to them in the welcoming hall.

"Baby you're alright?" He asked, embracing Sora tightly. "I was so worried about you!" He whispered against his right cheek, his voice thick from the tears of relief he was holding back.

Sora didn't say anything, nor did he return the embrace, his eyes emotionlessly fixed on the lamp in the living room behind Riku. Even though he could feel his body warm against his, all he could think about was the frigid cold of his own body and about keeping himself from gagging at the nauseating stench of alcohol emanating from Riku. So all he had needed was a drink to figure out that he actually hadn't wanted to break up with him? He had probably thought that Sora would be crying in bed all day long, hadn't he? Of course, poor, over-emotional Sora would just wait for him, like some kind of loyal dog, like he always did.

Sora slowly dragged his eyes away from the lamp to look at Riku as he let go of him and without saying anything, he simply turned and walked up the stairs.

Sora was now heaving over the toilet, his tears of deception and pain flowing down the long his cheeks, his hands trembling as he wiped his mouth off with the back of his right one. Breathing heavily as he simply sat there for a few moments, feeling shaky all over and weak, he then flushed the toiled and pulled himself up by the sink, his legs refusing to support his weight.

The reflection of his face in the mirror looked pale and exhausted, but he couldn't think of sleep right now, he wanted to scrub off those hands that had crawled all over his body, groped and touched places only the one he loved had ever seen, taking away the aspect of intimacy and replacing it by a shame so ardent it was barely manageable. Each time he closed his eyes he could still hear their voices and feel the angst creeping up his spine.

He forced himself to stop thinking about it and took a deep breath, looking at himself in the mirror while wiping away the tears that had almost dried up on his cheeks. He was safe, back at the chalet and soon he would take the train back to DC and pack his stuff so he could stay at his mother's place on Destiny Island for a couple of days. He didn't want to face Riku anymore, he couldn't handle it right now and didn't think he ever would again

Closing footsteps sounded in the room next to his and he turned his head to the door he had left open.

"Are you alright?" Riku whispered, walking inside the bathroom, his face set on worry.

"Peachy." Sora whispered back faking a brief smile before taking his sweater off. He was just fine, he just broke up with the only person he had ever loved, spent half of the night searching for him in the cold and barely escaped from being gang-raped. Of course he was alright.

Just peachy.

Sora took off his boots and socks without glancing at Riku still standing there. "Would you mind getting out? You don't get to see anymore."

"Oh." Riku said softly, slightly taken aback, turning around. "Sure." The pain from before was still there in Sora's voice and he couldn't blame him, he understood. He had a lot of wrongs to set right.

With his forehead he rested against the closed door of the bathroom, the sound of water splashing against the tiles playing behind it, keeping him from what he held dearest in the entire world. Barely 2 meters separated them, and yet it seemed like half the world was standing in between.

He knew that deep inside, Sora needed him in there, but that he had lost all privileges when he ended their relationship. Being graced by his presence was one of those he lost as well and it made him want him back all the more. He wanted another chance, he needed another chance.

He just couldn't let Sora go like this.

* * *

Sora opened the door of the bathroom and stepped out fully dressed in a clean outfit, ignoring Riku sitting at the end of the king-size bed.

"Sora, we need to talk." Riku spoke gently, watching as Sora took out his travelling bag from the bottom of their closet and laid it on his side of the bed.

"I thought we were all talked out?" Sora indifferently said, now walking to the dresser at the other side of the room and opening the top drawer to take out his underwear.

"No we aren't." Riku whispered, standing now. "I made a big mistake. I can't let you go."

Sora only smirked and walked back to the bed with a pile of underwear in his arms. "Jeez Riku, you almost sound like you mean it." He mockingly said, dropping the clothes in the bag and turning to the closet again.

"I do mean it! I'm being dead-serious!" Riku spoke pleadingly, moving to stand in between the bed and Sora. "I love you, please don't go."

The brunette sighed and closed his eyes, letting go of the pair of pants he had wanted to grab off a shelf. "Riku, the entire day I've hoped for you to return to me, tell me that you love me like you just did. But you know what?" He whispered and turned to face him with an angry stare. "Maybe it's time I woke up from this dream I was forcing myself to dream, maybe it all just doesn't matter anymore to me!"

He walked back into the bathroom to take the stuff he still had in there.

Riku shook his head in disbelieve, not understanding Sora anymore. "How can you say that?" He whispered, following him into the bathroom. "What about everything we've been through? It all matters to me, you know? It does matter!"

Sora didn't answer but just walked passed him again, dropping the stuff he had retrieved from the bathroom in his bag and taking out the rest of his clothes and his beige leather trench coat from the closet.

"Sora please," Riku whispered, standing behind him when he had dropped his clothes in the bag as well and zipped it closed. "_You_ matter too much to me. I had lost sight of that because I was afraid of losing you in the first place." He placed his hands on Sora's shoulders as he saw him sigh and bend his head. "I thought that I wouldn't be able to give you what you needed anymore. I just… chickened out… I… I'm sorry."

Sora closed his eyes and let go of the bag now, turning around to face Riku, shaking his head. "Don't give me that shit about how much I matter to you. If I did, you wouldn't have broken up with me in the first place!"

Riku closed his eyes and sighed. "I know… But that's why I want to try again and don't fuck this up this time." He looked at Sora, wanting him to feel the sincerity of his words. "I want to be that Riku again, the one you fell in love with... the one that used to make you happy."

Sora turned his head away and crossed his arms over his chest, scoffing. "Do you think this is some kind of a game? Some kind of twisted play?" He asked, looking at him again and chuckling coldly.

Riku frowned and started to shake his head at the vicious words coming from him, seeing the seething anger in those ocean blue orbs that once only shone brightly with happiness and love. "Sora—" He started, trying to find a little spark of those emotions in his eyes.

Sora pointed at him accusingly, a sneer of utter disgust on his face. "_You_ break up with _me_ and expect _me_ to take_ you_ back? Just like that? Because you're sorry!" The tone of his voice was slightly rising with each word as he spoke, his anger because of what Riku did to him and because of what nearly happened coming to the surface. There was no way he would go through the pain of a shattered heart and an emotional abuse again. "You've played me for a fool before, but this time I'm not taking the bait." He whispered, staring him dead in the eye and shaking his head. "I'm taking the next train home. I'm going back to DI." He looked at him one last time before turning, putting his trench coat over the his white turtle neck sweater and grabbing his bag from the bed.

"What!" Riku softly said, the shock of the news taking his voice away. He could barely believe what he had just heard. "But Sora—"

"We're through." Was all Sora calmly said, shaking his head in a definite manner. "You've made yourself clear the first time, there's nothing else we need to discuss."

He walked out of the door and exited, leaving Riku on his own in the room.

* * *

After Sora's footsteps reached the last step at the bottom of the stairs, silence engulfed the house. Riku was shocked.

What the hell just happened? What the HELL just happened!

He simply stood there, still unable to grasp what was going on, this was absolutely not what he had planned to happen. He had wanted them to be happy again, for them to be able to be together again. Wasn't this the right way to do it? Riku then proceeded to sit on his bed, feeling his heart being taken over by a feeling of pain and emptiness.

This wasn't right… What could he possibly have done wrong…?

He began to stare at the ceiling, recollecting his thoughts, contemplating what he could do… Sora was leaving him… That was when that fact truly sunk in. He had really fucked up this time, he had broken up with Sora with intentions to not harm him and separate himself from him… And yet that was exactly what he had done.

No! He couldn't let this happen!

But what could he do?

Nothing.

Riku sighed, temporarily breaking the silence that had filled the room.

The door then suddenly creaked open and without a thought, he sat up and looked at the door. "Babe?" he asked with eagerness and enthusiasm in his voice, but soon his expression turned into one of disgust. "Oh, it's just you…"

"Yes. Me." Sephiroth's cool voice replied, almost sounding bored.

"What do you want?" Riku asked him abruptly, not feeling in the mood to deal with his brother as well as what had just happened between Sora and him.

"I've come to offer my services. Seen as you obviously need it." The older man stated, taking a few steps closer to Riku.

Riku then scoffed and crossed him arms around his chest, "Your 'services' are not required. Now get out."

Sephiroth didn't move as he stood there in front of him with an unreadable expression on his face. "Wasn't that Sora I saw walking out of here with his baggage?" He then crossed his arms over his chest and gave Riku a stern look. "Did he tell you what almost happened tonight?" Sephiroth said. "Do you know what he had to go through?"

Riku frowned and looked up at his brother. "What do you mean?" He had this sinking feeling in his stomach all of a sudden.

"Trust me, Riku." Sephiroth softly spoke, taking Riku's coat that was lying beside him on the bed. "You don't want to let Sora walk out of your door again. He needs you right now, more than you know." He held out Riku's coat while looking at his watch. "He may not be too far yet, but we need to go right now."

Riku grabbed his coat out of his brother's hand and stood, taking a step away from him. "I'm not going anywhere with you. Tell me first what happened to Sora!"

Taking out a piece of folded paper out of the right hand pocket of his coat, Sephiroth then handed it to him reluctantly. "It's the copy of the complaint Sora filed tonight against those who assaulted him."

"Sora got assaulted?" Riku exclaimed, taking the paper out of Sephiroth's hand. He let his eyes scan over the words Sora had written down and he could feel his eyes water up. By the time he had finished it, he was holding his right hand over his mouth in utter shock. "Oh my god…! Sora…"

"Let's go." Sephiroth said, walking to the door.

Riku nodded, following his brother out of the room.

* * *

Christmas songs were echoing through the speakers in the large station hall, the atmosphere far from merry from Sora's perspective on a bench right in front of the timetable. The clock on top of it read 5.47 am, the first train scheduled for DC leaving at 6.08 am. He still had a good twenty minutes to kill and so he patiently sat on the bench yawning tiredly, his eyes closed. He bent over and passed with his hands over his face, trying to get himself to stay awake when something flashed brightly in the corner of his left eye. He turned his head and saw the silver bracelet he wore on his left wrist. It had been a gift from Riku from when they had just gotten together.

He had been wearing it for so long now, never had he taken it off since Riku first put it on. He studied it silently; wondering what would've got happened if he and Riku hadn't gotten together. Where would they be at now?

Riku would've probably gotten himself a girlfriend by now.

Despite the situation and now that his initial anger was gone, Sora could feel a small smile coming up his face at that thought, because he knew, deep inside, that things wouldn't have got gone that way. Riku had always been there, right from the start, right from when they met, their friendship had grown from then on and simply turned into something more. They hadn't pushed it, it just happened. And right after they had shared the heat of their hidden lusts, they immediately knew.

It had been love. All along.

Even now, despite the fact that he was ready to leave, he still felt it. He didn't want to go, but some things, he knew, weren't meant to be. If it didn't work, there simply wasn't any use forcing it.

Love between 2 people wasn't supposed to become a one way track with time…

He sighed and looked up to check the clock. There was still 15 minutes left before his train was to leave.

Sora stood and decided to go to the restrooms at the other side of the station's main hall, rolling his travel bag behind him as he went.

His footsteps echoed through the abandoned hall, the station nearly deserted at such an early hour.

Washing his hands in one of the sinks in front of the large mirror now, his mind went wandering towards Riku again and the things he had said earlier. Even if they were all true, he just did not feel ready to give his heart to him again. He needed time and then, maybe he would— they could try again, but not now.

He splashed some water on his face and his heart froze as he looked at his reflection in the mirror.

That malicious face, red hair and the strange diamond-shaped tattoos on his cheekbones…

Axel was standing right behind him.

In an instinct he made a move for the door, but a strong hand held him back by his throat, pulling him against a strong chest.

Sora opened his mouth to scream, but he had barely made a sound when he felt a knife being held against his throat again.

"Shh… just be quiet, pretty." Axel whispered, looking at the both of them in the mirror. "I've finally found you. Aren't you happy to see me?"

Sora fought back against him, kicking with his legs, desperately trying to get free. He didn't need to relive the nightmare again.

With a grunt and a gasp from Sora, Axel pushed him with his back against a wall, smirking as he saw him hitting the back his head hard against the white tiles of the wall.

Sora opened his eyes again, his vision a little blurry from the hit he had gotten to his head. Tears ran the long his cheeks as he realised that he couldn't escape from what was coming to him this time.

And it didn't look like Axel was going to let him go after he was done with him.

"Why are you crying, pretty? We didn't even begin anything." The redhead spoke with a malicious grin, sliding the blade down the coat Sora was wearing and skilfully cutting off the buttons and through the knot in its belt.

Sora didn't dear to move, but he couldn't control the trembling of his body. He closed his eyes as he felt a cold hand tugging at the button of his pants. Why was this happening again? Why him?

"Sorry for the interruption earlier, I can guarantee you that it won't happen again." Axel's lips were brushing against Sora's left cheek, making him whimper at the shivers that run down his spine. He tried to blink away his tears, wanting his heart to calm down a little so he could maybe think of a way out of this, and not trying to think of all the thoughts of panic that were screaming in his head.

"Please…" He mumbled, underneath the hand covering his mouth. "Please don't…"

The redhead gave him a smirk before his hand disappeared into Sora's boxers, making Sora sob in desperation. He then laughed at that reaction, pressing a wet kiss on Sora's left cheek. "Please what? 'Don't fuck me?'" He whispered, mimicking Sora's frightened voice. He laughed again before groaning when he pressed himself closer to the brunette's groin. "I would think that a whore like you who's about to get a special treatment from 4 guys would be more enthusiastic…"

W-what?

Sora's breath chocked in his throat as he saw the door open itself, as if on cue, and the three other gang member strolling into the restroom.

"We made sure no one will come in here and disturb us…" A blonde haired guy spoke as he approached and started to unbutton his jean with a hungry eye on the now downright panicking Sora.

"Then let's get this party started." Axel chuckled towards Sora before grabbing him by his collar and throwing him on the floor in front of his friends.

Sora landed on his back and in the second he tried to crawl away from them, they closed in on him, blocking any escape route. "You guys are sick…"

They all laughed, the sound like rumbling thunder, nearly paralyzing him with another dose of fear.

Then, without any warning, one of them took his feet and held them up, making him slide over the floor kicking and screaming in fright. "No!"

"Hey, someone shut him up!" The one holding his feet said, now tossing one of Sora's ankle boots somewhere behind him.

A pair of hands grabbed his wrists and with some struggle, managed to pin them far above his head. Then it was Axel's face that appeared in front of Sora's before a large strip of duct tape came to cover his mouth.

He couldn't move and no one would hear him call for help.

* * *

With his heart beating anxiously in his chest, Riku got out of Sephiroth's car and ran towards the eastern entrance of Crystle's Central Station.

He was all the more determined to have his Sora back now that he understood why he had acted the way he did earlier. This time he wanted to have a fair chance at explaining his feelings.

The main hall was abandoned as both of them entered it, the large timetable indicating that the next train for DC was to leave within 10 minutes on platform 7.

"I'll go check on platform 7." Sephiroth said, running off in the said direction.

Riku looked around again; his mind wondering where could've gone because he had seen their dark blue, mini SUV parked right in front of the station.

It was in that precise moment that he heard something shattering in the distance. He turned his head to the sound and found himself looking at the men's lavatory. He frowned and started to walk in that direction before breaking into a run when he heard a distinctive voice calling out for help from behind the door.

It was a voice he knew very well and it sounded frightened.

It was Sora.

And he was in danger.

* * *

The mirror had shattered into a million pieces after one of the men had tried to hit him with one of his own shoes. Sora now struggled to get away from the pair of hands that had flown to his throat again, pressing up against the wall; his feet desperately kicking as the tips of his shoeless feet were trying to touch the ground.

"Let me go…!" Sora whimpered, holding on to the hands closing around his throat, taking away his air.

"Stupid bitch! That hurt!" Axel hollered in Sora's left ear, a slight bruise starting to form on his right cheek. He then turned to look at one of his friends who was holding on to his crotch. It was the same guy that had held Sora's legs earlier. "You alright, Seifer?"

The blonde only whimpered and sat himself down on the floor, still holding on to his crotch with a beet red face.

"Worthless piece of shit!" Axel whispered, looking at Sora again who was slowly suffocating in his grip. He then let go of him and slapped him in his face, making the brunette fall against the wash table, tasting blood in his mouth.

Sora then got pulled by his hair and the sharp side of a blade was pressed against his exposed throat, drawing blood.

"I should just finish you off right now, what do you think?" Axel angrily whispered in one of his ears, pressing the blade closer to Sora, red drops of blood rolling down his throat.

"Please, no…" Sora pleadingly whimpered, closing his eyes, knowing this would be it.

The door behind them then suddenly flew open.

"Get your fucking paws off of him!"

Axel turned around, still holding Sora close to him, wanting to face the one disturbing him so impolitely. "And who the fuck are you?"

Riku took a step forwards but stopped when one of the other guys came to stand right in front of him with a sneer on his face.

"Riku!" Sora sobbed, shaking his head. The odds on this one weren't good. Riku had no chance to win, no matter how agile and strong he was. It was going to be an unfair fight.

Another guy stepped behind Riku and Riku ducked, escaping the blade that had been ready to strike him and gave him a blow to his stomach with his right elbow before turning and delivering another blow with his left elbow to the guy standing in front of him and an uppercut to the guy who had tried to knife him.

Axel fastened his grip on Sora's throat as Riku now turned to him, making the brunette give a pained and terrified sob. "Take another step and I'll slice him open."

Riku halted; his eyes on Sora's crying ones, unsure of what to do. "You're a fucking coward, you know that?" He disdainfully said.

Axel only smirked, his green eyes rolling towards a point behind Riku.

Sora gasped, but it was too late. "Riku, behind you!"

Before Riku could begin to turn around, he got held captive by his arms so he couldn't offer much resistance when the one Axel called by the name of Seifer stood and punched him hard in his stomach.

"No!" Sora cried out, wanting to run to him, but feeling the knife cutting in his skin reminding him of his captive state. "Please stop!" He whimpered, closing his eyes at the hits Riku received on his abdomen and face.

Riku fell to the floor when they let go of him, breathing heavily, his lower lip bleeding and right jaw bruised.

"Riku…!" Sora fought against Axel's grip, seeing the one that had held Riku captive now bending over and taking a knife out of one of his pockets. "You bastards! Stop it!"

"Shhh…" Axel mockingly whispered in Sora's left ear, brushing a few of his brown locks out of his wet face. "It'll be quick and maybe he won't even feel the pain…"

"Riku get up please!" Sora sobbed, shaking his head as he couldn't do anything else than watch how Riku got pulled by his hair and how the knife went around his neck—

The door opened again, this time letting Sephiroth in.

He only needed one glance to understand what was going on and a minute later, Axel was the only one of his gang still standing. All others were either moaning in pain or trying to crawl towards the door.

"Let him go, Axel." Sephiroth coolly spoke. "Don't make me waste my energy on you."

Axel gritted his teeth now, realising that there was not going to be an easy escape. "I'll kill him. You just take another step and I'll slice his throat." He approached the knife to Sora's Adam's apple. Sora whimpered again.

"No you won't." Sephiroth calmly said, taking a step closer. "Let him go." He sternly repeated. "Let him go and you can walk out of here without getting your ass kicked like your cowering friends over there."

The redhead scoffed. "You think I'm afraid of you?"

"Just let him go and walk out of here." Sephiroth once again said.

Riku groaned as he woke from his unconscious state, opening his eyes and seeing his brother standing in front of him, talking to the redhead who still held Sora captive. He pushed himself up by his hands and moved his right leg so he could start to stand, wincing at the sore muscles in his abdomen and in his left arm. Riku finally managed to stand and locked eyes with Sora who, even though was being held captive, still found it in his heart to smile in relief at him. He could feel the pain and the angst in those large depths of blue, yet he knew the brunette long enough to know that even when taken over by fear, he wouldn't let that stop him to get free.

And right now, that was the exact type of determination Riku read in Sora's eyes.

Taking advantage of Axel's inattention to him, Sora hit him in his stomach with his right elbow, pushing the right arm away from his face and running into Riku's awaiting arms.

"You little bitch!" The redhead managed to whimper out in pain, doubling over and holding on to his stomach.

"Walk out, Axel. It's over." Sephiroth calmly spoke.

Axel only gave him a glare before limping away from the trio, making sure to cast a dirty smile Sora's way while passing.

Sora only buried his face in the crook of Riku's left shoulder and closed his eyes.

"You're just going to let him go?" Riku unbelievingly asked, still holding Sora protectively against him.

"Don't worry." Sephiroth spoke, turning around and facing the young couple with a small smile. "They should be getting a warm welcome from a very special committee right about now." He chuckled slightly and Riku smiled back.

Sephiroth then turned to Sora. "Are you alright?

Sora nodded and smiled. "Yes, thank you."

"Great stunt you pulled." Sephiroth winked at him before walking past them and exiting to go talk to the police outside.

Riku now let go of Sora and they simply stared at each other for a few seconds. Riku then bit his lower lip, insecure of what to say next. "I think you missed your train…"

Sora smiled at him and bit his lower lip. "There'll be other ones…" He whispered softly, cupping Riku's face in his right hand, wiping the little blood that had smeared itself out on one corner of his mouth. Sora then looked up into Riku's disappointed face. "But I can't go back home anymore because you had to go and get yourself beaten up. Now I have to stay and take care of you."

Riku chuckled and brushed a few strands out of Sora's face, his expression softening when Sora closed his eyes at his touch and one tear rolled out of his right eye. "Sora, I love you—"

"I know." Sora whispered, taking hold of Riku's hand, pressing a kiss in its centre. "I know and I love you too." He opened his eyes and looked up at him.

A few tears escaped from Riku's eyes as well and he bit his lower lip to prevent himself from sobbing at the immense feeling of relief that washed over him.

Sora chuckled, sniffling as Riku approached him, letting their lips meeting each other in a deep, loving kiss.

**_

* * *

I have a poll for you guys out there; I need to make out which couple should have a kitchen-sex scene in the next chapter._**

**_-Riku & Sora: if they have this scene, it'll be the second one for that chapter, meaning that they'll have two sex scenes._**

_**-Leon & Cloud: if they have this scene, it'll be sweet and tender lovemaking, reinforcing the feelings of Cloud's guilt and making him confess what he did behind Leon's back.**_

_**-Sephiroth & Cloud: if they have this scene, it'll only be to reinforce the feelings of Cloud's guilt and pushing him to make a choice between Sephiroth and Leon.**_

…_**Kairi has an announcement to make, wonder how everyone will react?**_

…_**Do you think we have seen the last of Axel?**_

_**Vote & Review to find all of these things out.**_

_To be continued…_

_**-BDP-**_


	9. One night magic

_This chapter is dedicated to two friends I met through fanfiction and who have proven themselves to be quite a source of inspiration. I thank the both of them for having been such great listeners and (especially you, Naked Goth) generous conversation partners._

_To Sexy and Naked Goth, you know who you are… :D _

_**-Blackdiamond Princess!**_

* * *

NINE: One night magic

* * *

"Does this hurt?" 

Sora gently pressed a wet piece of cloth against Riku's swollen lower lip, attending to the broken skin there.

Riku shook his head slightly and silently watched Sora take care of him with so much devotion. His small fingers delicately brushed a few of his strands of silver away from his face, the simple sensation of those soft hands on his skin making him tingle all over.

When Sora moved away to wet the cloth in a bowl of water he had placed on the nightstand next to him, he felt one of Riku's hands holding his left arm back. Sora looked at him, seeing him open frightened eyes, fearing he was leaving him again. A tender smile grew on the younger male's face and he laid the cloth on the nightstand so he could place his right hand comfortingly on Riku's face. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm not leaving you anymore."

Riku nodded, his eyes filling up with tears again.

Sora endearingly smiled and moved up Riku's body to press a gentle kiss on his forehead. "Don't worry."

Riku closed his eyes and carefully took a deep breath, trying to avoid his ribs from hurting too much while doing so, but unable to resist the sweet scent of Sora's vanilla perfume. "You smell so good…"

Sora gave him another smile before turning back to the nightstand and taking a cold-hot compress out of another bowl, to lessen the swelling of the large bruise Riku had on his left side, right underneath his ribs. "Just tell me when I'm hurting you too much." He placed the compress on the rapidly purple turning skin and quickly removed it when Riku gave a slight groan of pain. "Sorry." He apologised with an empathic wince, blushing a little.

"It's alright…" Riku said, placing his right hand on Sora's, guiding it back on the bruise gently.

The brunette nodded and reddened some more, feeling like a clumsy teenager all over again and Riku's hand on his only seemed to make it worse. "I… I haven't thanked you yet for what you did for me…" He softly whispered, keeping his eyes on their joined hands, not finding the strength to look at him.

Riku simply looked at him and tilted his head to side slightly, observing him silently. "You don't owe me anything…" He then whispered softly, shaking his head.

Sora closed his eyes and sighed, unable to bear what he was feeling inside any longer. Now he felt responsible for the bruises Riku had on his body. He had known that putting the blame on Riku wouldn't solve anything and in the end, he had almost lost him for good. "I'm sorry, Riku. I'm so _so_ sorry for everything that has happened. I shouldn't have treated you the way I did, I shouldn't have got said those things—" He whimpered but got cut off.

"Don't do this to yourself. I understand." Riku softly spoke. "You've been through a horrible experience and I can only be grateful that you're still here. With me."

Sora looked up at him now, tears threatening to fall from his eyes. "I was so scared." He whispered in a tiny voice, laying his head on Riku's chest, closing his eyes tightly. "And all I could think about was you… I kept hoping that I'd be able to see you again and wishing that I hadn't said all those bad things…"

Riku smiled tenderly, removing a chocolate lock out of Sora's right eye. "When I first heard your voice in the station sounding so frightened and panicked my heart almost stopped beating because I was terrified that I might be too late. I've always wanted to be the one to protect you Sora, because that is simply what I want to do when I'm around you."

Sora closed his eyes, letting his tears escape freely now. "I do attract trouble, huh?" He sniffled, producing a watery smile.

Riku shook his head and chuckled a little. "No matter. I'll always protect you." He took Sora's right hand and kissed its palm's centre. "I'll always love you."

Sora sighed and sniffled, his lips quivering as they tried to hold his sobs back. "But Riku—"

"I'm the one who messed up in the first place." Riku said with his eyes closed. "I almost lost you and I felt like dying. I don't want to experience this ever again."

More tears rolled down Sora's face as he gently laid a hand on Riku's swollen lower lip. "Me neither." He whimpered, shaking his head and moving in to embrace him.

Riku rested his chin on Sora's head and held him close. "I don't know where the future will take us, but I want you to be by my side. I'm still learning this thing we have you and I and even if it is by trial and error I will do the best I can to make it work and not leave you to maintain our relationship on your own."

Sora smiled against his chest. "Do you promise?"

Riku paused for a moment and looked down at Sora's face lying against him and fastened his grip. "I promise you, Sora. For real this time."

The brunette smiled contently and nodded. "I know." He then looked up and detached himself from the embrace. "For real."

"Sora…" Riku raised a hand and cupped Sora's face, his thumb caressing away another tear rolling down his cheek. The older male could feel and see Sora blush, causing a burning desire to start growing inside of him while their eyes gazed with tender affection at each other. He longed for Sora, wanted to make love to him slowly and passionately just like he deserved to be made love to. The hands touching him with so much care hadn't helped to fight these feelings. What he absolutely did not want right now was to force Sora into having sex with him and make the same mistakes like before. Things would have to go slow this time, not only because of his injuries, but also because they needed to rebuild a little of the trust they had lost between each other.

Sora slowly moved closer, feeling his body respond to the beginnings of a sexual tension, his large blue eyes silently asking for permission to approach. He slid his hands up Riku's broad and firm chest, carefully creeping up his body; ready to put his lips on his.

Riku took a breath and gently stopped his approach with a hand on his right shoulder. "Are you sure?"

Sora blinked and gave him a confused look. Riku wiped away the tears that had never left the corners of the brunette's eyes and traced the contours of his full lips with a finger. After the rollercoaster of emotions they both had had to endure during these past two days he definitely did not want to abuse of misinterpreted feelings. "I mean, are you sure you're… ready? After tonight?"

Sora sighed in silent relief, having feared a rejection, and paused for a moment, looking Riku in the eyes, contemplating his words. "I'm sure." He then whispered before he got off the bed and stood next to it, his eyes still locked with Riku's.

In one fluid movement he took off his white turtleneck sweater and threw it at the end of the bed. He then unzipped his pants and lowered them, stepped out of them and stood there in nothing but his dark blue shorts and a t-shirt. "Make love to me, Riku. Please." He whispered, the t-shirt now going over his head, revealing more of the soft caramel toned skin he had and his slender figure.

Riku let his eyes glide over Sora's body, gazing longingly at his small chest and the hardening rosy nipples. He held out his hand and the brunette took it, approaching him to sit next to him on the bed. He then brought their joined hands up to his lips and kissed Sora's knuckles, his eyes still fixed on his. "I just want to be really sure that you want this…"

Sora smiled at him, his right hand caressing the older male's left cheek tenderly and planted a tentative kiss on his lips. He saw Riku open his eyes again, his question still silently present in their depths. This made Sora giggle softly and he moved in again, enmeshing their lips in a tasting kiss. A pink tongue swept over the silver haired one's lips this time, searching for remains of the sweet kiss. Sora bit his lower lip at this and stood back up again, now taking his shorts off. "I want you."

Riku only stared with growing lust as he received proof of his desire and took him in his arms as Sora moved himself to straddle him. "You're so beautiful…" He whispered against his lips, caressing his brown spikes.

Sora cooed approvingly and moved in to press his lips against Riku's. "Then let's make love… Please…" He whispered, taking Riku's hands in his and putting them on his hips, wanting to feel his hands on him as he rolled his hips against him. "You don't have to do all the work, but let's do this…"

Riku kissed him back, closing his fingers on Sora's hips, feeling himself getting aroused because of the electric friction between their bodies. He understood what Sora meant, and knew that not only he needed it, but that both of them did. Their brief separation had been enough to have them longing for each other like a desert longed for a single drop of refreshing rain…

Sora tilted his head back, letting Riku slide his lips down on his throat, shivering at the sensation of tongue and teeth playing alternately against his skin. The need for more skin-to-skin contact took the upper hand of his thoughts and he rubbed himself against Riku's still clothed crotch enticingly, wordlessly trying to convince what he so desperately wanted.

"Help me out of this, then…" Riku murmured sexily, his hands now resting on the small of Sora's back, coaxing him to stand on his knees, his lips never leaving Sora's skin.

"We don't need to take it all off, do we?" Sora whispered, his eyes closed at the tender kisses raining down his throat while he skilfully managed to unbutton and unzip the jeans just enough.

"No we don't…" Riku breathed out, sitting up carefully and pulling Sora to him, the tip of his fingers tripping down his curved back.

Sora arched, submerged in the intensity of the moment, his lover's name tumbling off his lips more times than he could count. Goosebumps appeared on every place that Riku touched, his body left shivering with growing anticipation. "Take it… It's all yours…"

**_(More?)_**

* * *

"Open wide…" 

With a chuckle Sora let Riku put the small amount of chocolate ice cream in his mouth, and applied little suction when his index slowly withdrew. "Yum…" He whispered, his eyes locked with Riku's.

A perfectly shaped silver eyebrow rose in silent satisfaction as he got pulled closer to his lover sitting with his legs spread wide on the edge of the kitchen table in nothing but his dark blue shorts and the black silken night robe he had given him to cover himself with. "Mind if I have a taste too?" He whispered against Sora's lips with an impish smile.

Sora giggled softly before letting Riku's tongue slide past his lips and flickered briefly against his to induce the kiss that followed. He moaned softly as Riku's clothed groin pushed against his, his hands sliding down his bare sides and over the slight curves of his hips just above his black silken pyjama pants.

"I love the way your skin tastes afterwards…" Riku whispered, his lips now skimming over the smooth skin of Sora's left shoulder, pushing the black fabric of the night robe aside, making it fall over the shoulder.

Sora smiled softly and closed his eyes at the tender press of moist kisses on his skin. "How does it taste?"

"Like sugar…" Riku whispered, kissing his way back towards the curve of Sora's neck. "Better than chocolate … sweeter than honey…"

Sora let out a small shaky breath when Riku caressed his lips against the crook of his shoulder, sending shivers down his back. He moaned again at the stronger press of their awakening members, his right leg hooking itself around Riku's left leg, pulling him even closer as his hands now slipped inside the black pyjamas.

"No matter how hot that is right now, there are some people who would like to have breakfast on that table later."

Both lovers turned their heads to the entrance of the kitchen and found a slightly blushing and annoyed Kairi standing there in her pyjamas.

"Good morning, Kai." Sora greeted her with a drowsy smile, leaning into Riku.

"Don't you guys ever sleep?" She asked them as she now stood in front of the fridge, yawning. "I was barely able to close an eye last night."

Sora winced a little and shared a brief gaze with Riku. "We're sorry; I guess we kind of got… carried away…" He whispered with a small giggle, closing his eyes at the lips and tongue playing against his throat.

"I understand, really…" The redhead spoke, rolling her eyes at her friends' shamelessness. "I'm happy you two worked things out. Finally." She took out a pack of sausages, butter, milk, eggs and some bacon and put it on the table next to Sora. "But next time you guys make up, please warn in advance." Her eyes then fell on the opened box of chocolate ice-cream. "Chocolate ice-cream at 9 o'clock in the morning? You sure you two need to arouse each other further?" She asked, but could as well have asked one of the surrounding walls that question, because all she received as answer was a moan from Sora as Riku nibbled on his right earlobe. "Hello?"

With a simultaneous moan they both turned and looked at her, their lust filled gaze giving her body a shot of arousal. She closed her eyes and turned to hide her blushing cheeks. Ever since Riku and Sora had gotten together she just had to admit that they looked unbelievably hot as a couple. They were one of the sexiest people she knew, but now they were simply oozing 'sex'. "You guys… really…" She said, embarrassingly.

"Are we bothering you?" Riku asked with a small smile, already pulled by his neck by Sora for more physical contact.

Kairi turned to them again, wanting to answer, but found them all over each other again. "There are places for this, you know? They're called bedrooms." She whispered, turning her head away again. "Or bordellos…" She added with one eye on them.

Sora giggled. "We kind of… messed up our room…" He said with a grin, causing a sigh of defeat to escape the redhead.

"Boys…" She whispered, shaking her head.

"Have some ice cream, Kai. You should taste it, it's really good…" Sora scooped up a little bit of ice cream on the top of his right index and fed it to Riku, who immediately caught his lips in a fiery kiss after.

"It's 9 o'clock in the—" Kairi started, but gave up with another sigh. She then tilted her head to the side as she watched her two best friends acting so affectionate towards each other. "I don't think so… Not after what Wakka made me do last night, I don't need the extra horniness…"

"Oh." Sora and Riku shared another gaze before they both broke down in chuckles. "So we weren't the only ones having wild monkey sex last night, huh?" Sora asked with a giggle.

Kairi slapped her right hand on her forehead.

"Actually, no you really weren't." Another voice interjected from the kitchen door.

All of them turned around and saw Cloud standing in the entrance, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "I had to sneak out of bed to get some rest."

Sora laughed and got off the table, closing the night robe around his body and walking towards the drawer containing the cutlery to take out a small spoon to eat some more of the ice-cream.

"Ugh… I need some coffee…" The blonde sighed, strolling towards the coffee machine at the extreme left side of the kitchen, turning it on.

Kairi chuckled and walked over to her brother. "At what time did you get back last night?"

"Around a quarter to 4." Cloud whispered and then gave her an apologising look. "I know I promised to take you to the clinic…"

"It's okay," Kairi whispered with a soft smile, pressing a kiss on her brother's forehead, "you just rest up. I'll ask Riku or Sora to take me."

Cloud smiled at her and then pulled her into an embrace. "No, I want to go with you. We'll just go in the afternoon."

Kairi's smile grew wider and she breathed out in relief. "Thank you."

"Everything is going to be fine… I promise." He whispered in her right ear. "Don't worry."

"I'll try not to, but I'm scared." She whispered back, her voice trembling but a little. "I'm really scared."

"Let's go take a shower and give them some space." Riku whispered in one of Sora's ears.

Sora absently nodded, yet a concerned frown formed on his face. He hadn't been eavesdropping on Cloud and Kairi's conversation, but now that he looked at them, he could tell something was wrong.

When he followed Riku towards the door, he caught a glimpse of Kairi's face and read a strange kind of fear on her face. Almost immediately she hid it underneath a happy smile and a wink while waving them out.

"Did Kairi seem alright to you just now?" Sora asked Riku as the older male took hold of his right hip so they could walk up the stairs side by side.

"Sure." Riku whispered back, turning his head to him now. "Why?"

Sora thought about it for a moment and then shrugged. "It's probably nothing…"

"You can always ask her later." Riku whispered, pressing another kiss on Sora's head. "But now I really want that shower…"

The brunette giggled and freed himself from Riku's grip. "Then what are you waiting for?" He asked, now standing at the top of the stairs. "Race you!"

"Yeah, right." Riku chuckled, starting to jog up to him.

"You slowpoke!" Sora taunted before breaking into a run and laughing when Riku suddenly took two stairs at a time.

"Just wait 'till I get my hands on you!"

"Is that a threat? Should I be scared, Ri-ku?" Sora jeered, looking over the reeling of the third staircase at Riku who was now climbing the second staircase.

"You'll be singing another song when I'm through with you, you just wait!" Riku chuckled back, speeding up.

Sora giggled loudly and ran the last set of stairs to the second floor and flew into his room just when Leon opened the door to his.

He only gave Riku a knowing smile as he passed him by and silently continued his way downstairs, shaking his head in mild amusement.

* * *

Gentle lips pressed into the skin of his neck and he closed his eyes at the hands passing around his waist. "Why did you leave bed?" 

Cloud shivered internally at the deep and smooth tone of his lover's voice, putting down his mug of coffee next to the paper he had been reading. "Good morning…" He whispered back with a soft smile.

"It would have been a better one if you just had stayed in bed with me…" Another kiss on his skin and Cloud almost moaned, silently thankful that he had told Kairi he'd take care of breakfast.

"Are you saying that you would have outdone your performance from earlier?"

He could feel him smile against his neck. "Would you like proof?"

Cloud chuckled and turned around to face him. "You've already deprived me of my sleep." He said, reprimanding.

"I'll make it up to you…" Leon whispered, now burying his face in the junction of Cloud's right shoulder and neck, nibbling tenderly. "No one's around and Kairi just went up the stairs…"

"Ah…" Cloud breathed out, sliding his right hand through Leon's shoulder-length mane and arching his neck in pleasure. "We shouldn't…" He honestly did not want them to do this right now, yet his plea came out as a mere horny moan. The real reason for having left bed earlier hadn't been the lack of sleep, for he could've got gone to the lounge and slept on one of the comfy couches, but once more and yet again, it had been Sephiroth. He had enough of hiding what he did from Leon, the secret was eating away on his conscience and he found himself more and more unable to look Leon in the eyes with each passing day. He felt like some kind of a whore and the mere thought of Leon showing him the extend of his love and patience like he had in the past few days filled him with abhorrence towards himself.

Last night, he had fought the urge to break down in sobs during their entire love-making session, holding back the desire to push Leon off of him and run away. He kept wondering how he could have got done such a disgusting thing, why he had done this to Leon and what the hell he had been thinking…

Sephiroth and he was a thing of the past; he had dug a hole and cast their story in it before burying it. What good has it done, digging it up again?

_Nothing._

It had only brought pain, remorse and self-loathing.

Exactly the same feelings he had felt when he had found out that Sephiroth had betrayed him by stealing his drawings and using his ideas for the interior design of one of his hotels in Destiny City.

And now, as he looked into the clear grey of Leon's eyes, he wished that he could turn back time and choose for him and not make the terrible mistake he had now made…

He couldn't do this.

"Leon… stop…" Cloud whispered, his eyes closed with starters of tears glistening on their edge. "I really need you to stop…"

He preferred coming clean now and confess everything to Leon, than to keep playing him for a fool. If it meant losing the one he loved, then he would take it as his punishment for what he did to him, but he couldn't go on like this any longer.

Leon frowned at the teary tone of his love's voice and moved out of their intimate embrace, looking worried as he saw a tear now rolling down Cloud's beautiful face. "Baby…?" He whispered, wiping the tear away with a finger while another drop escaped the other eye.

Cloud bent his head and bit his lower lip to prevent it from trembling. He sniffled and looked up at him again, now sobbing softly, his tears cascading down the long his face one after the other. "I can't do this…" He whimpered softly, shaking his head.

"What's—?" The tall brunette started, but stopped dead in his words when Cloud moved himself away from him when he had wanted to touch his face.

"Don't." He whispered, still shaking his head. "I can't do this anymore. I have to tell you something." He whispered, looking at him with an apologising expression, his tears still flowing. "I… It's something I did… and I have to tell you."

Leon now gave him an attentive expression, his eyes narrowing themselves slightly in suspicion. As he looked at Cloud crying like that, he could feel an angst starting to take over his heart, a sinking feeling starting to grow inside of him, creating a black hole that sucked in all other feelings. All words seemed to escape his mind as he stood like that, facing Cloud, though his face never revealed his inner torment. He was not ignorant of course to what it possibly was that his lover was about to tell him. He knew it concerned Sephiroth and to him there were only two ways out of this, regardless of what Cloud would say. Their story would either end here, or their love would continue on and be stronger than before.

He had told himself that the return of Sephiroth was another trial their relationship would either overcome, or lose. And although an unwelcome fear and doubt had settled itself in his mind, he wouldn't just give up on them, no matter what the outcome of what Cloud would say.

"I slept with Sephiroth."

Leon didn't even move from his position at these words, although he could feel a pang in his heart. He let out the breath he hadn't realise he had been holding and realised that his eyes had watered up a little as he blinked, his mouth gone dry as he swallowed with difficulty. His eyes rolled away from Cloud's pained expression and he closed them, suddenly feeling tired.

"And I regret it, I really do. It was a big mistake."

Leon's eyes opened again at that and he looked at Cloud, who had more tears escaping from his eyes. He hadn't expected him to add that, not in the least. He had thought that Cloud had wanted to leave him and had chosen to be with Sephiroth. But did this truly mean that he had chosen for him?

Cloud cringed at the piercing gaze he received from Leon and turned his head away while closing his eyes when he saw a tear rolling down from his right eye. He had hurt Leon in a most horrible way and he did not expect to be forgiven now or ever. He had blown it, blown seven years in just one night.

Still, he still felt like letting Leon know that even if it was now over between them, he still had chosen for him. "Because I love you, and you're the only one I ever wanted to be with from the start." Even if these words didn't reach their destination, they were at least off from his chest.

"Cloud…" Leon gently spoke, approaching him again. He had heard what he had wanted to hear and that was enough. With his right index he lifted the blonde's face up to his and looked into his endless pools of remorse and wiped away the tears that took away their beauty. He did not doubt a second about the sincerity of his words because one night did not weight out against seven years of mutual trust and love. It was stupid to even think about making it all end because of it. They loved each other, that much was true and no matter how many exes would come by it wouldn't change what they felt for each other and what has been going strong for over seven years.

Cloud blinked in surprise when Leon suddenly pressed his lips against his, kissing him with a passion he hadn't expected after his confession. He got released and found himself staring into Leon's eyes again, still not understanding what had just happened.

The confusion in the azure eyes of his lover made a soft smile appear on Leon's lips. "I adore you." He whispered against his lips, taking his head in his hands. "I truly do."

Then it all made sense to Cloud and he couldn't help but break down in tears again. He understood now that Leon's greatest fear had been losing him and now that he had told him clearly that he was the one he wanted to be with, all the rest didn't matter anymore. "I'm so sorry…" He got taken into an embrace, silently whispering a 'Thank you'. "Leon…"

"Cloud…" The brunette whispered, rubbing the tip of their noses together. "What we have, is strong..."

"I'm sorry my doubts made you doubt too…" Cloud whispered back, closing his eyes at the soft kiss he received on his right cheek. "I love you, Leon."

Leon slid down to Cloud's throat with his lips, while his hands slid down the blonde's sides and grabbed hold of his hips to make him sit up on the kitchen table with his legs spread wide. Both hands then slid up the smooth skin of Cloud's back, dragging the t-shirt he had been wearing with it and taking it off. "I want you."

"Leon…" Cloud threw his head back at the lips planted in his throat and Leon's body pressed against his. "Then have me." He whispered throatily, laying down himself on the table.

Leon gave him a small smirk and then proceeded with removing the baggy sleeping pants Cloud still wore, all the while observing with a hungry eye how he writhed sexily out of the clothing garment, revealing his beautiful body. As the pants fell to the floor, he got pulled towards the blond again by the collar of his shirt and into a soft kiss as Cloud sat up.

Sliding off the table and standing on his feet in front of Leon, Cloud then loosened his black drawstring pants and lowered them, his eyes never leaving his.

Leon smiled and placed his hands on the blonde's lips, coaxing him to turn around while he spoke smooth words of approval onto his skin. With a hand he then slid down in between Cloud's legs, applying a gentle massage there to awaken his desire more.

Eyes falling shut, Cloud arched his back, his right arm crawling around Leon's neck while his rear grinded searchingly against his crotch. Soft licks and kisses made him shiver all over, Leon's hand creeping up underneath his t-shirt causing him to moan softly in pleasure.

Leon then forced him to bend over on the table, eliciting an amused chuckle from the blonde, who was already used to his lover's little patience during foreplay. A hand then went to cup one of his buttocks and squeezed it lustfully, while lips and tongue on his right earlobe made the diversion complete.

Cloud gritted his teeth in pain at the tip slipping past his tight ring of muscles, breathing in soft gasps. "Ah… You want to make me bedridden for the rest of our stay here, huh?"

**_(More?)_**

Panting heavily with his right cheek pressed against the wooden surface of the table, Cloud winced slightly as Leon's length slid out of him. "Carry me." He then whispered with a smile after he heard him open the faucet for water and then felt him wipe him clean with a soft tissue.

Leon gave a small snicker before bending down next to him and cleaning up the drops of semen on the floor. After having washed out the cloth and put it in a plastic bag so he could throw it in the laundry bin once upstairs, he picked Cloud up in his arms and walked out of the kitchen.

"Let's skip breakfast." Cloud whispered with a smile.

"Wasn't it your turn to cook?" Leon teased back with a smirk.

"They can also cook…" Was the murmured answer, his smile now turning into an impish grin. "Besides, I'm not hungry for food…"

* * *

The weather had warmed up a bit in comparison to the last two days and Riku decided to take Sora out for his ice-skating lesson. 

"You sure the ice is thick enough?" Sora inquired, eying the vast surface of ice with a distrusting expression on his face from behind one of the windows in the lounge.

"It's been freezing here for almost 2 months now, I'm sure baby, come on." Riku said with a child-like glee on his face, pressing his lips on Sora's crown and walking passed him and into the welcoming hall.

"Can't I go with you guys?" Sora asked Kairi and Cloud who were preparing to leave as well.

"Even Wakka is not coming with me." Kairi shook her head and put on her red bonnet over her hair. "Wouldn't want you to miss your first ice-skating lesson!"

"Sorry Sora, it's nothing personal." Cloud said with a smile, standing up now from his position on one of the couches. "Ready?" He then asked his sister, who was checking the content of her coach purse.

"Where are you guys going anyways?" Sora wondered as he watched them move towards the hall.

"Shopping." Kairi said with a smile. "I'm short of a few gifts." She winked at him and turned to Cloud again. "Let's go."

Cloud kissed Leon, who was sitting at the diner table reading, goodbye and then followed his sister down into the garage.

"Baby, can't we do this tomorrow or something? I really don't want to." Sora pouted, walking up to Riku now with a begging face. "The ice kind of scares me, what if we break through?"

Riku chuckled and approached him, placing his hands on each side of his face. "I've been coming here ever since I was a kid and the ice never broke." He reassuringly whispered against his forehead, caressing a kiss there. "I just want to share my childhood memories of my time here with you…"

Sora smiled and closed his eyes. "I can't ice-skate." He whispered, feeling annoyed that now Riku had to teach him how. "I won't be able to stand on my feet."

"You'll be standing on blades more exactly." Riku grinned down at him as he saw another pout growing on his face. "I'll be there for you to lean on. Come on, it's not going to be that hard."

"Well… okay… but don't laugh when I fall on my ass!" He whispered, following Riku, who laughed heartedly, into the vestibule to take his winter jacket and other winter accessories.

Several hours had now passed and outside the chalet, laughter and the sound ice-skates on ice could be heard as Riku and Sora looked at the sun setting between the naked branches of the trees of the surrounding woods in the distance.

"Look, look!" Sora excitedly said, placing a hand on Riku's right shoulder and slightly pushing himself away to make a full circle around him. "Ta-da!"

The older young man chuckled at his boyfriend's cuteness and tapped the tip of his gloved right index against his little red nose. "Told you it'd be fun."

"Yeah!" Sora giggled, clapping his hands and making little dampened sounds because of his thick gloves. He then sniffled and got some hair that came from underneath his hat out of his eyes and smiled happily at him.

"I feel like having a nice cup of hot chocolate, and you?" Riku said as he smiled back and reached out a hand to him. "Care to join me?"

"Uh-huh…" He nodded, following Riku back to the house.

Walking back inside the house and thankful for the warm air that met their cold faces, Sora immediately moved himself to the open fire in the lounge and laid himself on the rug in front of it.

"I heard you guys having fun out there."

Sora turned around and smiled as he saw Wakka walking up to him and sitting himself on one of the couches. "What have you've been up to today?"

"I've walked around the house a bit, exploring it. I didn't know there was a piano room behind the diner room." Wakka said, grabbing the remote for the TV. "Did you know that they also have a sauna and a Jacuzzi?"

"Really? Where?" Sora asked with an interested look.

"It's through that door in the middle of the stairs when you arrive on the first floor." He responded, zapping through a couple of channels. "It leads to a terrace with a view over the woods and a part of the lake."

"Oh good to know…" Sora said with a smile and turning his head to look at the giant flat screen above the chimney. "Has Kairi called?"

Wakka nodded. "10 minutes ago, said she and Cloud are on their way back here."

"What's for dinner? I'm hungry…" Sora whispered, running with a hand over his stomach. "Who cooked?"

"No one." Wakka said with a smile.

"Huh?"

"We're going out for dinner, forgot to tell you earlier." Riku said as he walked into the lounge with two mugs of hot chocolate. "Seph's treat."

"Wohoo!" Sora exclaimed. "Nice!"

"We're just waiting for Cloud and Kairi to return." Riku gave Sora his mug of chocolate and sat himself next to him on the white rug.

"Is Leon coming too?" Sora asked him before taking a sip from his drink.

"Wouldn't know why not." Riku answered, shrugging.

Sora smiled at him softly and didn't add anything to that. "At what time are we leaving?"

"Sephiroth left a message on the fridge, saying he'd meet us at the restaurant at 7." Wakka answered, his eyes fixed on the blitz ball game playing on TV. "Leon proposed to leave at a quarter past 6."

"Ah ok." Sora whispered, bringing his mug close to his lips again. A chill suddenly ran down his spine and he shuddered slightly.

"Are you okay?" Riku whispered. "Are you cold?" He scooted closer to him and reached towards the TV-blanket on the couch next to him and spread it out to cover them both. "Better?"

Sora nodded. "I just felt a chill run down my spine…" He whispered, snuggling closer to him and resting his head against his.

"I'll keep you warm…" Riku whispered back, kissing his head.

Sora smiled at him and they shared a soft kiss.

The house phone suddenly rang on a small decorative table next to the Christmas tree and Sora stood, being the closest one to it. "Hello, this is Sora speaking."

"So, did you guys talk things out?" Wakka asked Riku.

"Yeah, everything is alright now, but I heard you and Kairi had some bonding time too, eh?" Riku chuckled. "Everything alright in Carrot top Paradise?"

"Our Paradise is just fine." Wakka said with a content smile."Our time here has really brought us closer. Couldn't live without her."

"Oh my _god_…!" Sora suddenly exclaimed in horror, the phone still in his right hand and his left one covering his mouth. "Oh my god!"

Riku immediately jumped to his feet and came to stand next to him with a worried expression. "Sora, what is it?"

Wakka had moved himself closer to them too.

Tears sprang out of Sora's eyes as he grabbed Riku's arm. "Cloud, is she going to be alright? W-where are you now?" He asked with a shaking voice, looking at Riku's face that was becoming more and more concerned.

"Kairi?" Wakka asked with growing worry in his voice.

"Oh… god…" Sora now sobbed, hanging up. "They had a frontal accident with another car, their car slipped and—Kairi is being operated!"

"Sora, where are they now?" Wakka asked, already running towards the vestibule.

"Braska Memorial Hospital…" Sora said, still in shock of the news. "Oh my god, Riku…" He turned to his boyfriend who took him in his arms.

"She's going to be okay, Sora…" Riku soothingly whispered, closing his eyes and holding him tightly. "She's going to be alright..."

"Oh Kairi…" Sora sobbed. "Let's go too, Riku…"

"Leon is upstairs." Riku then whispered, letting go of him as Wakka's car drovedown the driveway and exited the gate. "I'll go tell him, you get to the car already."

Sora nodded and went to get their coats and the car-keys while Riku ran up the stairs to go tell Leon the troubling news.

Five minutes later, all of them were on their way toBraska Memorial…

_**

* * *

Now a special thanks to you guys out there, I haven't forgotten about you! Thank you all for your votes and I'm sorry for the reviewers on Mediaminer, but I don't plan on returning there again! **_

_**You guys inspired me in your reviews and comments and I hope you'll keep doing so and that you enjoyed this chapter as well.**_

_**Thank you!**_

_**-Caution-**_

_**High levels of emotions coming up in the next chapter!**_

_To be continued…_

_**-BDP-**_


	10. Dreaming wide awake

_Hi everyone! Yes, I know, sorry for the extremely long wait… exams are a pain, don't remind me…_

_So here's the next chapter, as promised with high doses of emotions AND a big revelation… so stay scotched to your seats peeps!_

_Enjoy!_

_**Blackdiamond Princess! **_

* * *

TEN: Dreaming wide awake – The never-ending nightmare pt. 1

* * *

The sounds of hasty footsteps that were heard coming down the hall echoed against the naked walls of the establishment and they all looked up, in hope to see a doctor or anyone who could inform them on Kairi's state.

A young woman with long, curly brown hair was walking hand in hand with her companion, a loving smile adorning her face as she looked at the little baby she carried in her left arm.

Cloud watched them pass by with eyes brimming from the tears, the accumulated frustration and feeling of guilt threatening to make him collapse. It was Leon's comforting presence that kept him from giving in. "What is fucking taking them so long?" He whispered, taking a deep breath, fighting back the tears once more.

Sora was trying to oppress his own fears as he suddenly stood from his sitting position next to Riku on one of the chairs in the wait-room and walked over to the window in the back. He actually didn't know what to do to keep himself from worrying to death.

"Ange…"

"I'm scared." He whispered, resting the back of his head against a welcoming shoulder.

Riku pressed his lips against the crown of his head and closed his eyes. "I know, I am too…"

Sora took a shaky breath as the arms surrounding him tightened their hold on him, giving slight comfort to his state of distress.

Wakka sat silently on his chair, bent over and resting his head on his hands, staring into the distance. He had simply sat himself down when they had told them that Kairi was still being operated. His silence was his way of coping with all that was happening. Giving into panic wasn't his style and he knew that he'd be more useful to Kairi if he kept his head clear.

A blonde haired nurse then approached them, making the entire group turn their heads in his direction. "Are you here for Kairi Miyaki?"

Cloud hopefully lifted his head away from Leon's chest and took a step in the direction of the young man. "Yes, are the doctors done with surgery?" He shakily whispered.

The nurse nodded and then turned to the entire group. "She's recovering now, but we can allow but two persons in the room with her for the time being."

Wakka stood up. "Have the doctors said if she is going to be okay after this?"

"Doctor Shinji will tell you more about her state. He's waiting for you in front of her room."

"Just go you guys, we'll wait here." Sora told Wakka and Cloud.

"Tell her we love her." Riku added with a soft smile, holding Sora closer.

With a nod, Wakka and Cloud followed the nurse down the hall to the intensive care centre and disappeared behind the large green doors.

* * *

The shadows cast on the walls by the fire burning in the fireplace were dancing in the dark, their forms strangely comforting to the young brunette sitting in front of the burning pile of wood.

Two days had passed since the accident and Christmas Eve was tomorrow.

Not that Sora even cared anymore, with all that had happened. It was hard to see the good things in the world after everything all of them had been put through.

Sleep had proven itself to be traitorous enemy now; his mind had rendered itself to dark thoughts and endless sessions of worrying prevented him to find the depths of a careless sleep.

_"…She suffered major damage to her uterus, we stopped the haemorrhage but I'm afraid that the scar tissue that will form there will make it impossible for her to carry, let alone bear a child…"_

He did not know why the news hurt him so much personally. Becoming a parent himself was a dream he had put aside a while ago when he knew Riku would be his partner for life. Yet something had died within him when the doctor had delivered them the news. In his dreams, he couldn't stop hearing a child crying, it felt like it was blaming him, accusing him of making it so sad and so lonely. It wrenched his heart to hear those cries, making him feel guilty for not using his semen to a more useful purpose…

Kairi turned from a young, attractive and fertile woman to an un-fertile one. It wasn't her fault, she did not choose for it, but he was young and very fertile and he wasn't using his ability for procreation out of his own choice… Two years ago he had cast away his hopes for having a child on a boat with Riku holding him in his arms. He had thought that those feelings had been gone, why did he have to be feeling like this now?

Pulling his legs up his body, he rested his chin on his kneecaps, gazing into the fire, an emptiness starting to fill his heart, an unexplainable feeling of loneliness and fear taking hold of him.

"Does this make me a murderer…?" His whisper got lost in the shimmering darkness surrounding him. "Is this even right?"

He closed his eyes and sighed, wiping away the tears he hadn't noticed before. For some reason his mind suddenly had to replay the events of his assault a few days ago, messing everything up more. He couldn't help but feel, and now even more with what had happened, like an empty shell, something that could be easily disposed off, something meaningless and without purpose…

"Sora?" Naked footsteps coming from the hall could be heard as he turned his head to the sound and soon gentle hands were laid on his shoulders. "Sora, it's 2 o'clock in the morning, what are you doing here?" Riku kneeled next to him on the carpet and noticed his tears glistening in the light of the fire. "What's wrong babe?" He whispered, taking him in his arms.

"I just… I—" Sora sniffled back against his chest, clinging to him. "I just feel like…"

Riku ran his right hand through the mass of brown hair and held him close, shutting his eyes and pressing a kiss on the crown of his head. "Like what? Talk to me ange…" He could feel his heart break at the soft sobs that started against his chest.

"It should've been me. It's not fair; it should've been me…" Sora sobbed, his tears flowing down his cheeks as he gritted his teeth in anger and frustration. "It's not fair, Riku…"

Riku held him protectively against his chest, making small shushing sounds to try and calm his little lover. "It's alright, babe… It's alright…"

Sora shook his head and detached himself from him, his tears still rolling down his cheeks. "No, it's not… What are we doing? Why do we make love, what's the use? I receive your seed, but it goes to waste! I can't give you children! And god…" Sora paused and looked at him with pain filled eyes. "I'm so scared…" He whispered, his voice small and fragile, "I don't want to feel like I have nothing inside of me, like I don't mean anything..."

Riku gave him a gentle smile and wiped away the tears rolling down his left cheek with his thumb. He had wondered when Sora would finally yield to the pain he had been carrying inside of him since the incident on that parking lot a few days ago… He had figured that Kairi's accident would be a trigger, because he knew that that was just how it all worked in his Sora's head.

"Sora… I was wondering when you'd finally break down…" Riku whispered with a soft smile. "It's alright… I understand how you feel and I'm here." He took him in an embrace and tightened his grip on him. "I know you're feeling guilty and scared because of what happened to Kairi, but what happened to her doesn't say anything about you or us…"

"But I feel so empty inside… My heart, it feels like it's on the verge of breaking…" The brunette whispered, his voice taking on a panicked tone as he trembled from trying to talk while sobbing at the same time.

Baby, hey…" Riku soothingly whispered, looking at him now. "It's going to be alright… "He smiled at him. "One day, when we'll both be ready, I want to have children, make a family with you."

Sora whispered his name and held him close, his hands grasping frantically at the fabric of his t-shirt. "Riku… I'm scared almost all the time… a-and it's like I can't get rid of it, that fear… It's everywhere and I-I can't— I can't shake it…" His tears now flew down his cheeks as he cried his bitter sorrow, desperately trying to find a peace of mind, needing something to hold himself on to even if it was only for a little while.

"Let me fill the emptiness for now, Sora. Let me be your shield…" Riku closed his eyes, rocking them back and forth. "Let me be what you need… for now, please?"

"I can't…" Sora whimpered, holding him tighter. "I can't… Please help me…"

"Oh Sora…" Riku shushed, rocking their bodies back and forth. "It's okay…" He let Sora finish crying his tears. "I'll never leave you; you'll always have me to protect you. I love you, Sora Nagakawa."

A watery smile appeared on his face while it was against Riku's chest and nodded. "Just hold me…"

This made Riku kiss him on the crown of his head and tighten his grip. "I'm here…"

"Riku… Thank you so much for being you." Sora whispered, looking at him now. "Since day one, I've loved you so much."

"Feeling a little better?" Riku whispered softly, taking him back in his arms and pressing a soft kiss on the crown of his head. He felt Sora slightly nod against his chest and he tightened his hold on him. "I told you before Sora, and it wasn't a childish wish." The silver haired one whispered, looking down into his beautiful face and brushing a few stray locks of brown behind both of his ears before cupping his face. "No matter what has happened these last few days... You and me? It's forever." He then chuckled; "And I'm sorry to say, that you'll never get rid of me. I'm like cockroaches. I pop up everywhere"

Sora giggled up at him and closed his eyes as Riku's lips descended upon his. This was the Riku he loved; always trying to make him feel good, even in times like these. "Well then, I guess I love you, Mister Cockroach."

"You guess?" Riku chuckled, tentatively brushing his fingertips over Sora's left side making him giggle. "And I who thought that I had your unconditional love…" He was tickling Sora now, eliciting more giggles from the brunette who was soon writhing in his arms, begging for mercy.

"Ah-hahaha…! R-Riku, stop…! I l-love you, okay? At least, I think I do…?" Sora was now lying on his back, trying desperately to keep Riku's hands away from his body. "Oh god, please stop-ahahaha…! I… love you, I surrender, Mister Cockroach!"

"How much do you love me?" Riku asked, his hands stopping their tickle-attacks on him.

"This much!" Sora said, spreading his arms wide with a grin.

"That much?" The older male whispered back, chuckling at how cute Sora was right now.

"Yes, that much." The brunette whispered, his hands now joining behind Riku's neck. "And even more, but my arms are too short."

Riku chuckled. "Is that your final answer?"

Sora nodded. "It's my only answer." He softly whispered up to him, his right hand moving up to brush some of his long silver locks behind his left ear. "I can't thank you enough for all the things you do for me. No one will ever compare to you, you're the only one who truly understands me."

"At your service 24/7…" Riku whispered back, though the airy tone of his voice had been replaced by a more serious one as Sora pulled him down on the carpet. "Are you sure? We can't make too much noise…"

"I don't care…" Sora whispered back, already pulling Riku's drawstring pants down his hips with a hand while wriggling out of his shorts with the help of his other. They both let out a soft moan as their crotches came in contact with each other, their flesh awakening to the sensual friction.

"I need you…"

**_(Need more?)_**

When he found his strength back, Riku lifted his head and kissed him deeply. As the brunette gave a surprised sound, he pulled back to give him a crooked grin. "Do you still feel empty…?"

"Ahh… You're hard… again…?" Sora moaned, closing his eyes at the length throbbing to life again within him. "R-Riku-uhnn…"

The silver haired one did not answer but moved in to kiss him again and placed his elbows on either side of Sora's head, brushing away the dampened locks of hair that had come to cling against his face before thrusting inside of him again.

"Ouhh…!" Sora moaned up to him, feeling so loved it was almost overwhelming. There was no feeling of loneliness or one of emptiness, he felt so much life in him right now, so much love he didn't want anything else. This was what he had had thought missing, but he had had it all along. Riku had reminded him of this, and he felt even more blessed to have this man in his life.

For now, this was all he needed, for now this was enough; he couldn't ask for anything more.

* * *

A naked arm slid around his waist, spooning him against Leon's resting body as they both lay on the bed, a moist kiss pressing on the nape of his neck. He sighed, placing his hands on the arms holding him, waiting for a sleep that never came.

Listening for any sign of his lover's awakening after the passing of many moments, he disengaged himself from the embrace he was held in and made his way to the door, making sure no sound caused Leon to wake.

Arriving in the hall at the end of the stairs, he saw the soft glow of the dying fire coming from the lounge room, the forms of Riku and Sora's sleeping bodies cuddled up on the right couch underneath the TV-blanket.

He turned and walked away, moving himself to the piano room.

There he let his fingers glide over the keyboard without much attention, only to find a feeling of sadness taking hold of him as the few notes vibrated in the bright, moonlit darkness.

His eyes laid themselves on the full moon shining through the naked tree branches and on the besnowed scenery, his forehead connecting with the glass of the window as he sighed and closed his eyes.

Kairi had been pregnant.

It had been such a hard reality to gobble down, not only for her, but for him as well. The chances of her ever carrying again were extremely slim.

He was worried sick about her, but after two days of constantly being by her side, Leon had convinced him to return to the chalet and rest, but he was way too agitated to find sleep, let along just rest.

Wakka was with her now, and he had to admit that the redhead had proven himself to be a real source of support to his sister, his calm nature and comforting words reaching further than his own neurotic and anxious state of mind. He knew he would take care of her, because it was undeniable to everyone that he loved her deeply and that he was prepared to do anything to procure her the happiness she deserved and needed right now.

A rustle of fabric and the shuffling of feet were suddenly heard behind him and he started to turn when a deep, sultry voice greeted him.

"You should be asleep because you need your rest."

His eyes fell on Sephiroth, who was standing by the door, wearing nothing but his pyjama bottoms, his naked torso seeming to glow in the pale light.

Cloud didn't respond, yet simply turned his head away again, closing his eyes. "I can't find sleep…"

A hand was laid on his right shoulder. "Then at least try to rest."

"Please Sephiroth." He whispered back, turning his head towards the hand that lay on his shoulder. "I have a lot on my mind."

"I can imagine…" The older man whispered understandingly, yet not moving his hand from its current position on Cloud's shoulder. "We can talk, if you want, koishii."

Cloud closed his eyes and looked away again, shaking his head. The pet name Sephiroth had given him so long ago didn't have the slightest effect on him anymore. It was as if there had been shackles squeezing around his heart, keeping him for letting his past go. He felt free now, free to take the next step forward.

"I thank you for your concern." He whispered feeling Sephiroth come closer and place another hand on his other shoulder. "But I would like to be alone now."

"Understandable." Sephiroth replied, his hands now sliding down Cloud's arms.

"There is no need for this any longer, Seph." Cloud whispered softly, turning around again, and facing him once more. "I have already made my choice."

A serene expression formed on the taller man's face, making it hard to see if he felt any emotion at all for what Cloud was going to tell him. Or was he that confident about the answer to the question he had asked the blonde last week?

"The time I spent with you will forever be written in my heart. I cherish the times when we argued and loved afterwards, the times you showed me how much you truly loved me. But you and I know the reason why we broke up. My trust in you has been shattered and up until today it hasn't fully returned and I don't think it ever will be the same way it was before." Cloud resisted the urge to look away or close his eyes; he wanted Sephiroth to understand that he was being dead serious; he had to make things clear between them once and for all. "Despite the hard time you put me through, I found love again and he's the only one I want to be with. We love each other and what you and I did didn't change that one bit." Cloud fell silent as Sephiroth suddenly took a step closer to him. He then gasped as he bent over and took him into an embrace, countless questions playing through his mind; his eyes open wide in surprise.

Without any warning, Sephiroth then tightened his hold on him, sighing softly into his right ear. "Cloud. I won't give up on us…" He then pressed his lips against the blonde's forehead. "The way your heartbeat is racing inside of your chest must mean that you do have some feelings left for me, don't you? How can I accept what you said if you're not being sincere?"

Cloud kept his lips sealed, his eyes closed as he received another kiss, right before Sephiroth bid him goodnight and left the room.

_Damn you Sephiroth… Damn you…_

It was as if things didn't want to stop getting more and more unbearable with each passing minute.

Now he didn't only have his sister to worry about, but also his passive-aggressive ex-boyfriend.

_Why can't you just let me be?_

* * *

The orchids standing next to her on the nightstand were swaying slightly in the small breeze that came from the slightly opened door; the teddy bears sitting at the end of her feet were smiling sweetly at her, the big red and pink hearts embroidered on their bellies wishing for her to get well soon.

The balloons standing next to her bed were casting blue, yellow, green and pink shadows on her face because of the light coming from in between the light green curtains.

She turned her head to the left, finding Wakka sleeping in the bed next to hers and sighed. She looked up at the ceiling, her hands moving around her lower belly.

Before she could even start to hold them back, the tears were already flowing, soon followed by soft wails of the overwhelming feelings of loss and emptiness.

She crawled into a foetal position, holding on to her waist, searching for solace in her suddenly pain filled, yet empty world.

"Baby?" Came a soft whisper from behind her, followed by a pair of comforting arms encircling her waist. Wakka lay himself behind her on the bed, simply holding her, knowing that more words wasn't what she needed right now.

"Do you still love me?" She whispered, holding on to the arms around her tightly. "Do you still want me? Even now that I'm only half a woman?"

"Of course." Wakka whispered back, pressing a kiss at the nape of her neck. "Kairi, I love you so much. I couldn't start imagining my life without you in it."

Her face contorted itself again, more tears flowing out of her closed eye-lids. "I lost our baby..." She whimpered.

"Shhh... we both didn't even know you were pregnant..." Wakka consoled her, squeezing their joined hands softly.

"Are you relieved?" She asked softly, her eyes now open as she blankly stared at the orchids next to her bed.

"We both weren't ready for this child, Kai..." Wakka whispered, closing his eyes and snuggling closer to her. "But if you had decided to keep it, it would have been alright too."

"Even if we both weren't ready?"

"For some things you can't ever be ready enough." He whispered back, kissing her left temple. "We would've managed."

At this she broke down in tears again and he simply held her, consoling her with his presence and love he had for her.

An hour or two passed as they lay on the bed like that, morning soon turning into noon and with noon, came the time for departure.

"Ready?" Cloud asked Wakka as he waited with Kairi in the hallway. Wakka closed the door to the now vacant hospital room and handed Kairi one of the teddy bears Sora had given her.

"Please tell me Sora or Leon cooked, because I've had enough of this salt-less hospital food!" Kairi said from her wheelchair as they entered the elevator.

Cloud chuckled at her and started to push her forward. "Leon and Sora cooked today, just for you."

"Nice. Can't wait to get out of here." She replied with a smile.

Both Wakka and Cloud exchanged a look and they smiled softly in turn. Kairi was trying very hard right now to get herself together and honestly be happy for everyone who had supported her during the last week.

"So you guys honestly postponed Christmas just for me?" She asked with a giggle looking up at them from her seat.

"It wouldn't have been much fun without you there anyways." Cloud whispered back with a smile. "And the majority of the gifts under the tree are for you so we had to wait for the star."

She giggled again and squeezed her teddy bear in between her hands in excitement. "They better be big gifts."

"You'll just have to wait and see for yourself, doll." Wakka said with a smirk before stepping out of the now stopped elevator. "It's a surprise."

Cloud smiled at them both and then told Wakka to take over the wheelchair so he could go and arrange the paperwork that still needed to be filled in at the main counter for Kairi's checking out.

"Dude, you promised you'd pay us!" A hooded man loudly whispered as he talked into the phone of a phone booth not so far away from Cloud. "It's been 10 days already! Yea, they released me, just like you said they would, yea they bought it... So when can I receive the rest of my pay?"

Cloud frowned a little in annoyance and turned to look at the person. He found the guy staring at his rear as he was bent over the counter and chuckled as he was caught. They exchanged glances and Cloud went to sit himself down in one of the chairs in the waiting room, feeling annoyed.

"68 Ars Arcanum Lane? No I don't, but I'll be there in an hour. 78th floor, right."

Cloud stood back up to return the form to the lady waiting for it at the counter just as the man hung up and walked passed him, rearranging his hood so his fiery red hair went hidden underneath it more and disappearing through the revolving glass doors of the entrance.

"Thank you, sir. Have a nice day." The young nurse said, taking Cloud's form and taking it with her to her computer.

But Cloud wasn't listening anymore; something had just clicked in his head.

"That guy looked familiar... his eyes, his hair... Where...?"

_**It's been 10 days already!**_

"He's that guy who..." Cloud whispered in slow realisation and horror. "But how...?"

_**Yea, they released me, just like you said they would, yea they bought it... So when can I receive the rest of my pay?**_

"Impossible..." Cloud suddenly felt like he was going to be sick. "Don't tell me that he..."

_Ars Arcanum Lane 68 is where Sephiroth's enterprise is seated. His office is on the 78th floor..._

_

* * *

"Cloud Strife is here to see you sir."_

"Let him in, Lenne." Sephiroth spoke into the intercom, standing up to receive his guest.

The doors to his office opened and Cloud stepped in with a determined look on his face.

"Good afternoon, Cloud. To what do I owe this sudden visit? I thought that Kairi was supposed to get out of the hospital today?" Sephiroth greeted him with a content smile as he leaned against his desk with his arms fold against his chest.

"Had any red-headed rapists in here lately?" Cloud immediately asked, staring him dead in the eyes, clenching his fists that lay at his side.

One perfectly shaped silver eyebrow rose in a silent question, but Cloud did not seem to get fooled, so he unfolded his arms and rest them on the desk on each side of him with a smile. "You know, I have never been able to lie to you, Cloud."

"Answer the damn question!" Cloud spoke, losing his patience.

Sephiroth chuckled softly, bending over and closing his eyes. "I was sure you would come to figure it out some day. You're just perceptive like that."

Cloud couldn't believe what he had just heard. So it had been Sephiroth all along! He had been behind Sora's assault? He had orchestrated it! "Why?" He whispered in a horrified tone. "Why!"

"Can't you see it, Cloud? All I've been doing, all of this is for you, only for you..."

Cloud, still in shock, simply turned to look at Sephiroth, and as he came closer, he backed away. "What's wrong?" the white haired man asked. Cloud could only look with a fixed gaze. A gaze of seriousness yet at the same time, filled with pain.

"I... I can't... I can't even look at you anymore..." Cloud spoke, his voice strong, yet on verge of cracking, "What you did... To me, to us... To them... How could you...? You're a monster!" There were so many mixed emotions in his voice. Anger, pain, sadness.

Sephiroth took a step closer to take hold of the smaller of the two, but grasped only air; Cloud was too vigilant to be caught off guard.

"I never... not even in a picture, want to see your disgusting face again." Cloud firmly announced to the man in front of him. "If I could, I'd rip out the images of you from my subconscious, but I'll just have to deal with those."

Sephiroth's expression was one of coolness, but there was something else in it... Something... Unseen. "So, you're going to leave again?" the platinum haired one asked.

"Oh, yes." Cloud replied, "And this time, to a place where I'll be sure to not see you by mistake!"

Sephiroth simply turned around and stood in front of his desk. "I see... So... Your heart truly does lie with him... Doesn't it?" he asked calmly.

"What?" Cloud asked, a face of disturbance upon him.

"Is it that you love Leon too much to leave him?" Sephiroth asked straightforwardly. "Or are you perhaps afraid that he might harm you if you come back?" the silver haired man said, now looking straight at Cloud, his left hand resting on his desk.

Cloud's was shocked as he heard this, but he barely had time to even analyze those words when the next ones came. "Because, if you're afraid of him, I can take care of him. I can make sure that he won't come between us." Sephiroth was now turning around, his voice slowly losing it's cool, calculated tone.

"You think this is about Leon!" Cloud interrupted as Sephiroth was about to start another part of his little rant.

"Isn't it?" Sephiroth asked.

"No! My God..." Cloud ran a hand through his hair, and began to walk in circles. "You can't even see it... You don't even -know- what's going on!"

"Like I said, I can take care of him, the same way I took care of Riku and S—" Sephiroth began but his face soon encountered his left cheek to be overcome with a burning sensation. Slowly, he rose a hand to feel, and arranged his gaze to see what had happened; Cloud had slapped him.

"How dare you bring that up in my presence!" Cloud yelled, "You know something? You're sad."

Sephiroth simply looked with his cold eyes, still shocked.

"It's sad... That the great, calculated Sephiroth, top graduate from one of the greatest schools in the country can't see what's going on right in front of his nose; you can't even understand it!" Cloud said lowering and raising his voice, indication that his rage was sinking deeper into his heart.

"Let me set things in proportion for you, just so you can see things clearly, Mr. Makoto." Cloud stated. "You set this whole thing up from the very beginning, in an elaborate ploy to try and win me back." Cloud was now the one walking around the office, the switch of dominance clear in the atmosphere.

"However—" Sephiroth began, but was immediately cut off by the blonde.

Cloud was now no more than 2 fingers distance from Sephiroth's face. "You caused for Sora and Riku to endure inhumane sufferings because of your own greed, Sephiroth. You made them get hurt because of me, no, no, because of -you-." Cloud said in silent exclamation. "And now... This is the price that you pay."

Cloud was now at the foot of the steps that led to the door to exit the office. "Goodbye, Mr. Sephi—" but before he could finish his sentence, Sephiroth fell on his knees in his position in the centre of the office. Cloud tried to listen, to the sound he was emitting. Cries...? Or was it... Laughter? Sobs? What was it?

Cloud began to walk closer, slowly and with caution, the sound becoming clearer as he got closer. But these sobs were not just tears, there were words tied to them.

"If you had asked me to give you the world, I would have served it to you on a silver platter..." Sephiroth whispered, his face invisible from underneath his bangs.

Cloud closed his eyes and sighed, turning his face away from this sight. "Seph..."

"Look what you've done to me!" He whispered, looking at his trembling hands, his teeth gritted as he fought against the next wave of tears. "Look at what I've become." He now gazed at him with pain filled eyes, tinted with a hint of heartfelt remorse.

Cloud took a step back at this unsettling sight, Sephiroth's jade eyes piercing into his sapphire ones with such intensity it was hardly bearable. "How can you put the blame on me?" He whispered with a trembling voice, not wanting to feel sorry for him, not wanting to get caught into his web of deceit again.

"How can I not?" Sephiroth whispered softly, a slightly disturbing smile appearing on his face. "You're the only one I've ever felt so strongly about, the only one who's made me go to such lengths to gain love from." He then chuckled, although a lonely tear travelled the long his right cheek. "You drive me crazy."

Cloud could only feel pity for this man now, closing his eyes and turning away. "My love for you died a long time ago, Sephiroth. I have nothing left to tell you. Nothing left to give you." He softly spoke, turning around now, preparing himself to leave. "Please take care of yourself."

"No..."

Cloud halted for a second, but forced himself to continue on to the exit.

"No, you can't do this to me..."

There were not going to be any more turn backs.

"You can't leave me!"

There was nothing left to hold him back.

"Cloud!"

He was free.

"I SAID THAT YOU CANNOT LEAVE ME!"

The door he had started to open suddenly fell shut again under the weight of a heavy hand that was slammed upon it right above his head.

Cloud gasped in fright, removing his hand from the doorknob. Without turning around to face him, he found back his cool and calmly whispered; "Let me go."

Sephiroth closed his eyes, standing close enough to smell Cloud's sent, obviously enjoying their current closeness. "You're not going anywhere."

Suddenly, a loud clicking sound was heard from behind the door, the door's locks shutting themselves.

Cloud gasped again and this time turned to face him, not able to hide his frightened state any longer. He saw the small lock-control device in his right hand and looked up at him, giving him a gaze of utter disbelieve. "Sephiroth, let me go!"

The older man didn't answer, but only approached towards the blonde further, leaning into him while putting the locking device in his right hand pocket. His now free right hand then moved to take hold of Cloud's chin.

"Don't touch me!" Cloud venomously said, slapping his hand away only to have it close around his throat a moment later.

Sephiroth chuckled as he watched Cloud fight back against his grip for a moment before applying more pressure in warning. Immediately the blonde stopped fighting and he chuckled again in satisfaction. "I am not going to let you ruin our love like this, koishii. Not after all I have done to maintain it." Sephiroth whispered his eyes cold and harsh as he looked at him. "You're not going anywhere."'

"Seph, you're hurting me...!" Cloud managed, struggling to breathe. "Please... st-stop! You're being crazy!"

"You're mine, koishii." Sephiroth whispered, now close enough to brush away the starters of Cloud's tears with his lips. "I've allowed your little street rat to fuck you for a while, but even I can lose patience." He brushed a few blonde locks away from his crying face. "Your body, mind and soul belong solely to me."

With brute force he then ripped open Cloud's shirt, the buttons flying all around them, and then moved to loosen his pants.

"Sephiroth, stop, please!" Cloud pleaded, unable to hold his sobs in any longer. Angst was now rippling down the blonde's spine, knowing very well what was about to happen. "If you truly love me—"

"Oh but I do." Sephiroth smirked back maniacally. "But since you don't know what's best for you, you leave me with no choice."

"Sephiroth..." Cloud whispered softly, more tears rolling down his face before harsh lips descended on his trembling ones.

* * *

Japanese vocabulary list:

-Koishii : beloved

_To be continued…_

_**-BDP-**_


	11. Parting ways

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ELEVEN: Parting ways – The never-ending nightmare pt.2

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Everyone turned their heads towards the welcoming hall as they heard the front door fall shut.

"That must be Cloud." Kairi happily spoke from her seat at the set dinner table.

And indeed, not a second later Cloud walked in with a smile. "Sorry I'm late, I had forgotten an important ingredient for dinner." He held up a bottle of Piper Heidsieck Champagne and got acclaimed by a round of applause by everyone.

Another moment past and they all saw Sephiroth walk in with a large red bag. "Is it too late to play Santa?"

Even Kairi couldn't hide a chuckle at the sight of Sephiroth carrying that bag on his back. "Please join us." She whispered with a smile.

"Here, let me help you with that." Riku offered, standing up from his seat and walking over to his brother. "I don't think there's any more room underneath there…"

Sora watched with a soft smile how the two brothers occupied themselves with the gifts for a moment before turning around in his seat and finding Wakka and Kairi exchanging soft whispers and Leon cutting off a slice of ham and placing it on Cloud's plate. He laid back then, enjoying these moments of simple togetherness, the angst he had felt during the last week and even the sadness he felt knowing that Kairi and Wakka were leaving tonight, paling against the feeling of happiness that took over him now.

"Are you guys almost done over there? I'm hungry!" Kairi exclaimed, looking at Riku and Sephiroth still kneeling next to the tree.

"I'll go get an extra plate." Sora said as Riku and Sephiroth returned to the table. "I didn't know if you were going to be here with us tonight." He whispered apologetically towards Sephiroth.

"Wouldn't want to miss it…" The elder brother replied with a smile. "Especially when that ham looks so delicious— Is it honey glazed?"

Sora chuckled and blushed slightly. "Yes… I'll get you a plate."

Sephiroth took place next to Riku at the head of the table. "Excellent catch, bro…" He whispered towards Riku, who gave him a knowing smile.

"You should taste his house rolls…" Riku said, taking one out of a nearby basket and handing it to him. "To die for."

"Stop embarrassing me, Riku…" Sora said with a shy smile as he laid Sephiroth's plate in front of him and reached to cut the ham.

"He is right though, these are absolutely delicious." The silver haired man spoke with a smile after he had taken a bite. "Riku should consider himself very lucky to have someone who can cook for him like that."

Sora blushed again and chuckled shyly. "Thank you."

"Would you mind stop making him blush? Thank you!" Riku interjected with a chuckle. "Lower those eyes."

"Aww, Riku's jealous?" Kairi chuckled from above her glass of wine. "I expected more from you."

"You shut up!" Riku grumbled, making the entire table laugh.

Sephiroth chuckled. "I'm sorry if I offended you in any way, Sora."

"Don't worry about it." The brunette said with a giggle. "Riku's just being stupid."

"Eh!" Riku exclaimed, turning to his boyfriend now. "I have the right to protect you from anyone who's trying to make sneaky advances towards you!" He said with an eye on his brother. "Especially people like him!"

Both Sora and Sephiroth chuckled and Sora bent over to kiss his protective lover on his head. "Then you'll be happy to know that I only have eyes for you. Sorry, Sephiroth." He added with a soft grin.

"Oh, I'm sure I'm not the first one to be disappointed like this." Sephiroth replied courteously.

"Oh…" Sora couldn't help but blush again.

"Wow, smooth…" Wakka said, his voice holding a little hint of awe. "Maybe you should take lessons from him, Riku. He's good."

Muffled snickers could be heard, although everyone tried hard to hold them in.

"Okay, enough already!" Riku exclaimed, his eyes shooting daggers towards his brother.

Sephiroth only chuckled some more and decided to switch the attention on something else. "Those beans also look mighty appetising, could I have some of those?" He asked Sora who was filling his plate. "Who made those?"

"Leon did." Sora said, placing some on the plate.

"Ah." Sephiroth turned to the man sitting next to Cloud with a smile and raised his glass of red wine to him. "I've had the pleasure to taste your filet mignon the other day. I didn't get the chance to congratulate you yet on its exquisite taste."

"Glad it was to your taste." Leon replied with a microscopic smile that immediately cooled off the atmosphere.

Sephiroth brought his glass to his lips, his eyes never leaving Leon's loathing ones, a predatory gleam appearing in them. He then looked at Cloud who was only staring at his food-filled plate, his unease painstakingly clear to anyone who cared to look.

"Would you like some oven baked smashed potatoes?" Kairi offered, unknowing of the building tension between the three men.

"Yes, please." Sephiroth said with an amiable smile, shifting his eyes to Sora who reached towards the potato dish.

Riku frowned slightly at the switch of climate and as he laid his eyes on Sora's face, he knew that the brunette knew something more about the situation judging by his sad, yet worried face.

What was going on?

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"Could you tell me what all of that was out there?" Riku placed the dishes in the sink before he turned to look at Sora who was taking out the cake and the fruit salad out of the fridge.

"I don't know…" Sora whispered back, shaking his head sadly. "I really don't."

"It's about Cloud isn't it?" Riku asked, catching the brunette's attention. "They're fighting over him, aren't they?"

"So…you noticed it?" Sora's expression was now a worried one.

"It isn't exactly hard to see. Leon and Sephiroth haven't exchanged a word in the two weeks that we've been here and Cloud's been trying to avoid being in one room with the both of them." Riku said walking over to him. "What's going on?"

Sora looked at him and hesitated. If he told Riku what he knew, it would piss him off and ruin the renewed relationship between him and Sephiroth. Still, he could never lie to him…

"Cloud and Sephiroth are sort of seeing each other behind Leon's back." Sora whispered, recalling his conversation with Sephiroth a week ago.

"You're kidding me." Riku said, not believing it. "Are you absolutely sure?" He whispered in utter disbelief.

"Sephiroth told me so himself... In fact, that was what we had been talking about on that night you found us in our room and…" Sora bit his lower lip, hesitating again.

"And what?"

"I caught Cloud coming down from Sephiroth's room on our third night here, after we returned from the Utada concert. I know for sure they had sex because Sephiroth confirmed that as well…"

"What the hell?" Riku exclaimed, staring at Sora, totally astonished.

"I know. Don't get mad, please, this is not our problem…" Sora whispered, seeing Riku's face change into a scowl.

"No matter where he goes, he just -has- to fuck everything up…"

"Riku, please…" Sora pleaded, placing a hand on his arm.

"I know, I know." Riku said softly. "I won't butt in, but Cloud and Leon are our friends. I think it would be best if we had a conversation with them."

Sora sighed. "I'm glad you're offering that. I was unsure of doing it on my own. Though I don't think that Leon knows about the entire situation, I mean I don't think Cloud told him…"

"Then we'll talk alone with Cloud after dessert and after we've opened all the gifts." Riku said, moving over to the cake and picking it up from the table.

Sora nodded in determination and took hold of the large bowl of fruit salad and walked over to the door, closely followed by Riku.

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After dessert, they had moved themselves to the lounge were all reunited for the exchange of gifts. Kairi was sitting in-between Riku and Wakka on the couch closest to the Christmas tree, Sora was sitting on the floor in front of it and Cloud, Leon and Sephiroth shared the left couch, Cloud lying comfortably in Leon's arms while Sephiroth watched everyone from his seat at the end of the couch, closest to the sliding doors of the room.

"Okay, why don't we start with the person with the most gifts?" Sora spoke with a smile, handing Riku one of Kairi's gifts. "Let's start with the smallest one. It's mine."

Kairi took the small, red cube in her hands and undid the gift paper, revealing a blue jewellery box . "Swarovski!"

"I know how much you love that jeweller." Sora said softly.

She gave Sora a thankful smile before proceeding. "Oh… so pretty!" The box contained a pair of 3 inch long teardrop crystal earrings who shone brightly as she took them out and held them up. "Thanks Sora! I love them!" She beckoned him to move closer as she couldn't make too many movements yet.

"You're welcome, Kai." Sora hugged her back.

"Next is me." Riku said, reaching towards a medium sized, square box. "This one Sora and I bought for you, but my personal gift is in it already."

She took the in silver wrapped box and opened it, revealing a puzzling, with golden Chinese inscriptions written shiny black box. "It's kind of heavy… what is it?" She whispered, looking at the box from side to side. "Too bad I don't read Chinese…" She reached to the top of the box where a golden pin was settled and twisted it.

"You have to take it out." Sora informed with a smile, he and Riku exchanging a smile.

"Oh…" She took the pin out and the box fell apart in 4 equal parts, revealing a silver bonsai tree with a silver pendant, which matched the earrings she had just received, hanging from one of its branches. "Wow… you guys…"

"Good taste…" Sephiroth spoke in approval. "Very beautiful…"

She took the pendant and held it up. "I love it! Thank you Riku! Both of you!"

Riku kissed her on her right cheek. "You're welcome, princess."

From her brother and Leon she received a brand new laptop and Sephiroth gave her and Wakka a decorative water fountain.

"Here baby…" Wakka then whispered as she had received all of her gifts. "This is the last one, from me."

She smiled at him and took the small square box he was holding out to her with a blush.

"Oh-oh…" Cloud amusedly said. "It's small and squared, people…"

Sora gasped and held in a giggle, looking up at Riku with an excited smile.

"I would like for you all to excuse us for a few minutes…" Wakka then spoke with another blush on his face, standing.

"W-Wakka…" Kairi whispered, her lips trembling. She took the hand he was holding out to her and stood, following her out the room and into the hall.

"Oh no he isn't…" Riku chuckled, shaking his head. "Oh no he isn't…!"

"Oh yes he is…" Leon replied with a small smile, as they all watched how the doors of the lounge slid closed again.

"Cloud, you must've known about it." Sora said, turning to Kairi's elder brother now.

"Known about what?" The blonde innocently whispered back.

A loud squeal was then heard and they all looked at the still closed doors.

"About that." Riku commented, pointing with his finger towards the doors.

"What on earth are you guys talking about?" Cloud replied with a questioning expression on his face.

"You guys, we're engaged!" Kairi squeaked as the doors opened again and she showed them the new rock on her left hand finger.

"That!" Sora said with a giggle, now standing to go embrace his friends.

"Oh yeah…." Cloud said, acting as if it was all coming back now. "Yeah… I knew about that." He looked up at Leon with a chuckle and the brunet pressed a kiss on his forehead.

"Congratulations, Kairi!" Sora squealed as he now looked at the purple stone imbedded in between two white diamonds in a silver ring. "What kind of stone is this?"

"It's a purple diamond." Sephiroth said, with slight awe. "Very expensive because of its rarity…"

"Well at least I know my sister won't be marrying a hobo, that's a reassuring thought." Cloud said with a small grin.

"You jerk!" Kairi exclaimed, holding her fiancée close.

"It's alright, because it's true;" Wakka whispered to her now. "For as long as I live, I will make sure that you don't come short of anything, ever."

"Baby…" Kairi whispered, biting her lower lip to prevent it from quivering from the emotions coursing through her.

He bent over and they shared a soft kiss, holding each other close as Kairi buried her face in his neck to hide her tears.

All onlookers emitted a soft sound of endearment and then started clapping and whistling at them.

The evening proceeded and now it was Sora's turn to receive his gifts.

"Alright let me go first." Sephiroth said, as he stood and walked towards the tree. "Riku told me that you're a writer, Sora. A columnist."

"Yeah, he is!" Kairi happily said. "A good one too."

"Stop embarrassing me." Sora said, holding on to his flaring cheeks.

"Well, I hope this may come in handy some time." The tall platinum haired man spoke gently, holding out a red, rectangular box out for him.

As soon as Sora got hold of it, he was surprised by the heavy weight. "Wow! You're not giving me rocks, are you?" He said, placing the gift on the carpeted floor so he could open it more easily.

"Just open it." Sephiroth spoke with a soft smile.

"What is this?" Sora wondered as he had taken out a silver cube out of the box. "There's something written on it…" He held it up for Riku to see.

" 'What would you do if you if you knew you could not fail?' " Riku read with a small smile. "I think it's an inspirational paper weight, babe."

"Cool, give me one." Kairi said, holding her hand out as Riku reached out for another cube. " 'It's not the destination, but the journey…' " She read. "Deep…"

"Thanks, Sephiroth." Sora stood and embraced him. "I love them."

"I'm glad you do." Sephiroth whispered back, patting him on the back.

"Then I guess it's our turn next?" Leon said, looking at his lover who nodded and stood in turn.

"Now this is for the both of you and we want you to enjoy this until it is broken!" Cloud handed them a rectangular black box with a beautiful red bow.

Sora gave him a suspicious look. "I wondered when we'd get to see the sex toys…" He whispered with a blush, taking the gift and starting to open it. "What is this!"

Riku burst out in laughter and took the object out of the box, holding it up to the light. It was a black transparent, 7 ½ inches long dildo with curved bulb tip and internal vibrator. "A prostate massager." He chuckled. "Oh yeah… Are you doing anything later on tonight, babe?" He then asked his still blushing lover.

"Just give that here." Sora whispered, taking the toy out of his boyfriend's hands and putting it back in the box. "Thanks, you guys." He then said with his eyes closed, his face changing into another shade of red.

Everyone laughed and Sora hid his face in his hands.

"Next is us!" Wakka said and he took a flat, square brown box from underneath the tree. "The rest will come later."

A bit puzzled, Sora accepted the gift and opened it. "Is this some kind of a sex toy again?" He said with an amused smile as he took out a black leather dog collar with round studs and a nameless ID tag attached to it.

"I guess it's my turn now." Riku said, standing in turn, but instead of reaching underneath the tree, he walked out of the room and ran up the stairs.

"You guys?" Sora asked the rest, "What's going on?"

"You'll see." Sephiroth said, smiling.

"Riku's been through a lot to get this gift for you." Cloud added with a slight nod.

"I'm sure you'll like it." Kairi said. "It will be hard not to."

Sora then turned to the hall and they all saw Riku descending the steps with a large black box with holes and adorned by a big white bow in his hands.

Sora stood and walked up to him. "Here's your gift baby, I hope you'll like him."

A soft whimper could now be heard coming from the box and the brunette could feel starters of tears well up in his eyes as he removed the top of the box. "Riku…!" He whispered, reaching inside and taking out a small, black puppy with a way too large, red bow tied around its neck and amazing light blue eyes. "Oh my god… he's so cute!" Sora giggled as the small dog licked his right cheek in sign of affection. "Oh baby, thank you!"

"Merry Christmas." Riku kissed him on his lips. "I love you."

"I love you too! Oh, thank you!" Sora hugged him tightly, kissing him in his neck. "Look everyone!" He then turned to the group to show them the newest member of the family.

"He really is cute isn't he?" Kairi whispered as Sora sat back on his spot on the floor with his new puppy in his arms.

"What breed is it?" Leon inquired, watching how Riku sat himself down on the couch again.

"A Chesapeake Bay Retriever." Riku answered, looking at Sora playing with his dog with a smile. "The store owner told me that these dogs are valued for their bright and happy disposition, intelligence, quiet good sense and affectionate protective nature."

"I love him Riku, look at him!" Sora giggled as the dog ran circles around him and then stopped to rest with its front paws on Sora's crossed feet and barked cutely, wiggling its tail happily.

"Looks like he likes you too." Wakka said with a chuckle. "What are you going to call it?"

"How about…" Sora looked up at Riku for a moment for inspiration and back down at the dog that was still looking at him expectantly. "Trooper. I think I'll call you Trooper. Is that alright?"

Trooper barked, still wiggling his tail.

"Then Trooper it is!" Sora happily said, clapping in his hands, making the dog bark again. "Yay!" He laughed, taking Trooper in his arm again.

"Sora, it's not that I want to rush you or anything, but it's getting late and Wakka and Kairi still have a long way to go." Cloud whispered, sitting up now in his seat.

"Oh! I'm sorry!" Sora said with a giggle. "Let me take your gift, Riku." He gave the puppy to Riku and reached out towards the second to last gift that lay underneath the tree. It was square, flat and wrapped up in a blue gift paper. "Here baby."

Riku smiled at him and handed him back his dog before taking the gift and opening it. A white CD-case got revealed with the inscription 'Riku's Mom' on it.

"Sora…?" Riku looked at his boyfriend now, a questioning look in his watering eyes. "What…?"

Sora gave him a small comforting smile. "It's a video of some moments you guys shared. Sephiroth helped with some additional footage from friends and other relatives."

"You did this all for me…?" Riku whispered, holding back his tears. "W-when…?"

"Not long after she died I started with that project and thanks to Sephiroth I managed to complete it three days ago along with the photo album that I'm planning to give to you as well after this." Sora gave a short chuckle. "It was a close call."

Riku looked at his brother and they exchanged a knowing glance before Riku stood and almost ran to the DVD-player to insert the CD in.

Wakka dimmed the lights and the film began, the words "For Riku…" coming up on the screen.

A young woman with long platinum- blonde hair and smiling blue eyes was then shown posing on a picture, wearing what looked like hippie styled clothing and then another, in which she was near the end of her pregnancy showing off a cute baby-blue toddler ensemble.

"She was so beautiful…" Kairi whispered.

"I wonder whose huge head it was that made her look so big…" Sephiroth teased, making all of them laugh, even Riku.

Another set of images were then shown in a slide, showing Riku and his mother in the hospital, hours after his birth.

Then the images on the screen changed and a crying, blond toddler could be seen, sitting on his chair refusing to eat what looked like a light green mash of vegetables.

_"If you don't eat, you won't become a strong man… Come on, Riku… Come on…"_

The group made endeared sounds as the infant on the screen sniffled and opened his mouth reluctantly.

"Sora, I can't thank you enough for this…" Riku whispered as he was now sitting next to him on the floor, a tear finding its way out of his right eye. "This is of unimaginable value to me. Thank you…"

Sora smiled and kissed him softly on his lips without saying anything. They shared a few moments like that, simply watching each other before turning their heads back to the screen.

Half an hour passed as they all let Riku relive his shared memories with his mother, different emotions lingering in the air as the DVD came to an end.

"Okay, so now you've all seen that I used to wet my bed when I was five." Riku said as he now stood with Sora by his side.

They all laughed and every one could tell that the evening and their shared time together had come to an end.

"I am so grateful you all came these holidays." Riku spoke drying his cheeks quickly. "Even those who weren't invited in the first place." He said with an eye on his brother who gave him a smile. "I'm glad I was able to share my memories here with you all, all the bad stuff that happened set aside."

"Anytime bro. Always a pleasure." Wakka said, moving in to embrace his life-long friend. He then moved in to embrace Sora. "You take care of my bro like you've done tonight, alright? It was a fantastic gift you gave him."

"Thanks, Wakka." Sora smiled, hugging him back. "For everything. And I will take care of him as long as you take care of my Kairi there, alright?"

"Sure thing." Wakka chuckled.

They all exchanged goodbyes and wishes with good intentions and a few minutes later Kairi and Wakka were ready to leave.

"Post the invitations for the wedding as soon as possible, okay?" Sora whispered into Kairi's left ear as he gave her his final goodbye. "God, I'm so going to miss you, Kai. Take care."

"I'm going to miss you too Sora, take care." The redhead whispered back sniffling, holding her friend closer before letting go.

"Call me when you get in DC." Cloud said to Wakka, who nodded.

"Okay you guys, we'll see you in a couple of months when we'll be back in DC." Kairi said, now stepping inside their car.

Sora took a step back, wrapping his arm around Riku's weight and laying his head against his shoulder. "Bye you guys!"

Everyone waved at them as the car started to move and drove its way out of the gate, disappearing into the woods.

"Hey Cloud, could we talk to you?" Riku asked the blonde as they were all walking back inside the house.

"Sure Riku, what's up?" Cloud spoke back, standing still now.

"Let's get in the house first, okay?" Sora softly whispered. "I need to put Trooper inside first; it's too cold out here."

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"So, what's up you guys?" Cloud asked Riku and Sora now that they were standing on the terrace of the first floor, overlooking the dark woods and the moonlit lake. "Something wrong?"

Sora bit his lower lip and looked up at Riku standing beside him. Sora bit his lower lip and looked down at the floor before looking up at Riku beside him. "Uhm… Cloud, listen... I know that this is none of our business, but Riku and I have some reasons to believe that you... Well that you and Sephiroth..."

"Did you sleep with my brother?" Riku asked him straightforwardly.

It was obvious to both of them that the blonde was surprised with that question, and even more estranged with the whispered response "How did you guys know? ... Did someone tell you?"

"I… I know you slept with him on that night we saw each other when I was coming up the stairs after we came back from the concert…" Sora whispered, feeling very uncomfortable now. "And Sephiroth confirmed it to me…"

"Ah… I see." Cloud whispered with a soft smile. "Please, don't bother yourselves with it any longer. Leon and I have worked it all out already."

"Y-You have...?" Sora asked, feeling like a load was taken off his shoulders now. "You... told him about it?'

Cloud nodded. "Everything's alright now, thank you guys for worrying."

"So you and my brother don't have anything going on anymore?" Riku asked, though he couldn't hide the little hint of scepticism in his voice.

"No, there's nothing left between us." Cloud answered with a soft reassuring smile. "Nothing."

Sora smiled at him. "We're glad to hear that." He looked up at Riku. "Aren't we?"

Riku watched Cloud leave with a closed expression on his face. "Sora…"

"What?" Sora asked, looking at him.

"I think he was lying." Riku whispered back, now looking at his boyfriend. "He wasn't telling the truth."

"How do you know?" Sora softly wondered, giving him a non-understanding look.

"When Cloud's nervous, he constantly smiles what he thinks is a reassuring smile." The blond answered. "I don't want to call him a liar, but he was hiding something that's for sure."

"Why else would he have acted so nervous at the dinner table, right?" Sora whispered, realisation dawning on him.

"Exactly." Riku answered. "Things are definitely not over between him and Seph, but if he truly loves Leon, I wonder why he hasn't stopped it yet." He held his left hand out for Sora so he could take it.

"Do you think it is because he just can't?" They were walking back inside the house now and saw Cloud walk up the last steps to his room.

"Whatever it is, my brother hasn't got an innocent part in this." Riku spoke, watching how Leon came out of the lounge room as they walked down the stairs towards the welcoming hall.

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Not too soon after Cloud entered their room, Leon entered as well finding Cloud sitting on their bed.

"You've been crying." He whispered, walking over to him as he saw him rubbing his eyes.

Cloud stood and moved himself to their bathroom to take off his shirt. "It was just the wind that blew in my eyes." He answered back, before coming out again in his a t-shirt and walking over to the bed to take the thick sweater he had readily laid there. "Don't worry—"

"Avoid me all you want, but don't lie to me." Leon calmly whispered, making Cloud halt in his movements. "You've been crying and not because of the wind."

Cloud turned around with a comforting smile. "It's nothing, really."

"Please stop lying to me." Leon took a step closer and placed a hand on the blonde's face, tracing the line of his cheekbone with the back of his fingers. "I can see it in your eyes."

Cloud averted his eyes and closed them, taking his sweater from the bed before leaving the room.

Leon watched him go with a pained expression before he noticed something that caught his attention. He walked over to the bed and retrieved Cloud's jacket from it, holding it up in front of him.

Four of its six buttons were missing, the fabric torn on the places where they had been, meaning that they had been ripped away with force. Then something else came up in his mind, something he hadn't paid much attention to.

When Cloud had left to get Kairi earlier, his shirt had been red, when he returned it had been dark blue...

He found his cell phone turned off in one of the jacket's pockets, something he knew Cloud never did, especially not on a day like this, when there could be someone that needed him.

And then, there was one last piece of evidence that made the case complete.

One long, silver hair on the right arm of the jacket.

He did not need to ask what had happened anymore. The time for action was at hand now, and with it, the time to put everything to an end.

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"I have a gift for the both of you as well, but I'm afraid that there wasn't anymore room in the bag and I left it in my car." Sephiroth spoke, moving to stand. "Could anyone come and help me out?" He then turned to Cloud. "Cloud?"

Leon held Cloud's arm down on the couch as he had shifted to rise and shook his head towards the silver haired man. "Cloud's not going anywhere." He spoke softly with a smile. "Let me go with you."

Sephiroth's face briefly changed from mild surprise to slight amusement and he gave him a court nod. "Very well." He turned and walked over to the glass doors.

As Leon stood to follow him, he felt himself being held back by his arm; Cloud was looking up at him with an apologising face, slightly shaking his head.

Leon bent over and pressed a tender kiss on his lips. "I know, I'll be right back."

"Leon..." Cloud whispered, on the verge of tears.

Leon smiled at him a last time and followed Sephiroth out the house.

"Cloud..." Sora whispered softly.

"I haven't been honest with you guys..." The blonde whispered back, the first tears rolling down his face now as he stood up. "This is my entire fault."

Sora and Riku exchanged a glance, both dreading what would happen now.

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The snow cracked underneath their feet as they walked towards the silver Mercedes standing a few meters away from the stairs leading to the house.

"You can keep your gift. We didn't buy you any so it would only be fair." Leon said, stopping as they approached the vicinity of the car.

Sephiroth only smiled and waved the comment away. "It doesn't matter." He opened one of the doors to the back seats and took out a large square box. "I'm pretty sure Cloud will appreciate it anyhow."

"Stay with your paws away from him, you hear me?" Leon calmly spoke, his eyes glowing dangerously.

"Why so much hostility, Leon?" Sephiroth asked him as he locked up his car again. "It's Christmas, let us all enjoy each other's company."

"Christmas was a week ago and you overstayed your welcome here." Leon replied, his voice still maintaining its cool, articulate tone.

Sephiroth chuckled. "Pardon me, I often lose track of time. But I do remember that this house is half my property."

"Funny you should use that word, 'property' for I recall that you don't seem to have a sense of what is yours and what isn't." Leon said nonchalantly, taking a step closer to him.

"Have you noticed how we always end up talking about Cloud?" Sephiroth spoke with a chuckle, placing the box on the trunk of the car.

"This is the only conversation we've had so far." Leon noted, crossing his arms over his chest. "And I, for one, would like to keep it that way."

"Couldn't agree more." The older man responded. "So tell me, what is it that he ever saw in a street reject like you?"

Leon only chuckled and shook his head, not even fazed. "Why don't you ask yourself that question, after all, you're the one he left, not me."

"Ah... the past always catches up with you, does it not?" Sephiroth dramatically spoke with an amused smile. "But fortunately for us, mere mortals, it's the present that is of importance. I may have been the one he left, but you'll be the one to be abandoned pretty soon, mon cher."

"What makes you so sure about that?" Leon asked with a mistrusting face.

"I would think that the answer is painfully obvious, Leon. Cloud cannot love one who is dead, now can he?" He answered, shrugging.

"You blackmailed him..." Leon whispered, unfolding his arms from his chest and laying them by his side.

"Yes, you see, the deal was that he stays with me, so I wouldn't hurt you." He took out a revolver from his back pocket and pointed it at him. "But I figured that if you were to disappear, he'd have to stay with me either way."

Leon froze, his eyes directed to the weapon directed at him in anger. "And I who wondered why he left you?"

Sephiroth gave him a Machiavellian smile. "Move yourself over there." He shook his head in the direction of the frozen lake, his aim still on Leon's hart. "Move it."

Leon implied, though his mind tried to find a way to intercept the weapon from this madman's hands.

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It was the sound of a gun shot that shook up the three remaining people in the chalet.

"Oh my god!" Sora exclaimed, throwing his hands in front of his mouth, his eyes open wide in terror.

"Please… oh please no…" Cloud whimpered the tears of anxiety streaming down his face as he stood up and ran towards the exit door in panic. "Leon!"

"Cloud!" Riku called after him, moving himself to stand but feeling himself held back by a hand on his wrist.

"Riku…" Sora pleadingly whispered, shaking his head.

"He's my brother, Sora, I have to do something…" Riku whispered back.

"He shot Leon!" The brunette whispered back with a trembling voice. "He's gone crazy!"

"We need to make sure Leon is alright. I have to go, Sora."

Sora bit his lower lip and nodded reluctantly. "But I'll go with you." He bravely replied, standing beside him now. "I'll go with you." He put the dog that had been lying on his thighs in his box near the tree and took Riku's hand.

"Ok." Riku slowly nodded, keeping their eyes locked in silent determination. "Let's go." He led Sora to the kitchen, where they exited the house through the backdoor and got down the stairs leading to the ground.

"What if he shoots Cloud?" They were now walking around the house on the paved path that led to the façade of the house from the garage and halted on the corner of the house.

"He can't," Riku whispered in response, keeping his back pressed up against the wall as he spotted Sephiroth holding his gun pointed towards something in front of him, in the direction of the lake. "He wouldn't hurt Cloud if it's him he wants… He's aiming at something, but I can't see, his car is in the way."

"I can't believe this…" Sora softly said, reinforcing his grip on Riku's hand.

"Stay close to me." The other one said with one eye on what was happening near the lake. "I can't see Leon anywhere…"

"And Cloud?"

"I can only see Seph… aiming towards the lake, and he's saying something. I think he's talking to Leon or something… What the –Cloud!"

"What's happening!" Sora gasped and moved to see for himself but Riku held him back with a firm hand on his chest, shaking his head.

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"If you kill him, I'll kill myself."

Cloud was looking at Sephiroth dead in the eyes, his arms spread wide and the point of the 9 mm Baretta pressing against the middle of his chest.

An endeared smile crept on the older man's face and he made a soft 'tsk-tsk'-sound. "Step away, koishii." He softly spoke, pushing the blonde out of the way gently, who didn't budge. "He's the one in our way. Let me get rid of him and nothing will keep us from being together at last." He caressed away a tear rolling down Cloud's right cheek. "Now stand aside."

"No Seph!" Cloud sternly said, tears rolling from his eyes. "You promised. You promised you wouldn't hurt him…!"

For a moment, Sephiroth lowered his pistol and gave him a reprimanding expression. "I know I promised, but wouldn't having him dead save you from worrying about him?"

Cloud could only shake his head in disbelieve. "You're not the man I once used to love…"

Sephiroth chuckled. "I still am who I used to be ten years ago, koishii. Step aside."

"No." Cloud softly whispered, bending his head, and closing his fingers around the gun. "No…"

Stunned by the force of the shot he received in his right arm, Leon now opened his eyes and winced, reality coming back to him. He looked around himself, noticing that he was lying on the frozen lake now with his arm burning like hell. He groaned in pain as he moved himself to stand, looking at the shore to see Cloud standing with his back to the lake.

"Now, Cloud!" Sephiroth's voice had lost its sweet tone, he was getting angry. "Step aside."

Sobbing, but still determined, Cloud shook his head, his eyes never leaving his.

"Cloud, no!" Leon called out to him as he was limping/ slipping his way towards the lake shore, his right arm covered in blood and hanging limply by his side. "Cloud!"

"If you shoot him, you might as well shoot me too." Cloud whispered to Sephiroth, knowing Leon was trying to approach him. "I have no reason to stay with you if you do."

"You love him to such extend?" Sephiroth asked, the corners of his lips trembling slightly.

"I'd die for him." The blonde replied without a second thought. "That's how much I love him. And he'd do the same for me."

"No Cloud, that's not true…" The older one chuckled, not wanting to believe or hear what he had just been told. "What you and I have is real! He'll just go and break your heart!"

"Like you have?" Cloud coldly whispered back. "I don't think so. There's no way I could feel more pain than the pain you've caused me!"

In a sudden fit of rage, Sephiroth back slapped him hard, sending him to the snowy ground. "No one, you hear, no one will love you like I do!" He yelled at him. "NO ONE!" He then turned to Leon who was still on his approach to them and aimed at him again. "What have you done to him, you piece of shit!"

Cloud crawled back on his feet and launched himself towards the pistol, wanting to disarm Sephiroth. "No!"

They struggled for a few moments and then–

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Two gunshots were fired off.

"CLOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUD!"

"No!" Sora cried out, sinking to the ground his hands pressed against his mouth in shock. "Ohmygodohmygodohmygodoh—"

"Sora, I need you to listen to me now." Riku spoke very seriously to him, holding his crying face his hands so he'd look at him. "I want you to go call the police and an ambulance."

Sora whimpered at that and shook his head, holding on to Riku frantically. "No, Riku… please… I'm not leaving you!"

"Sora—Sora listen to me!" Riku sternly whispered, keeping Sora's head still and looking into his eyes. "I have to go see if I can help them! Ange, please I need you to go call for help!"

Sora only sobbed and shook his head. "Baby… he shot Cloud!"

"I know…" Riku held him to him now, kissing his crown. "But he might need my help." He let go of him. "Call the police."

"Riku…" Sora whimpered, most definitely not wanting to go but knowing it was Cloud's only way to survive as he now turned and ran towards the stairs leading towards the kitchen.

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Leon was bent over Cloud's body, the snow around him rapidly turning red as the blood escaped from the wound on his back. "Cloud… baby…" He sobbed as he used all the strength he had left to turn his lover over on his back so he could look at his face.

"Le-Leon…" Cloud shakily whispered, his lips trembling as they were rapidly turning purple. "I-I'm so s-sorry…"

The brunette shook his head and laid a trembling, bloodied hand on his lips. "Don't talk, save your strength." He whispered, sobbing. "Save your strength… Oh god…" The sight of the rapidly expanding crimson snow rendered him with an immense feeling of helplessness and despair.

Sephiroth took a step back at the scene, the horror of what he had done now dawning on him. "Cloud…" He whispered with regret. "Oh, Cloud…"

"You sick bastard! Are you happy now!" Leon yelled at him, holding on to Cloud who was slipping in and out of conscience now. "Is this what you wanted!" He then whimpered, turning his head back to Cloud's paling face. "Stay with me, baby… Don't close your eyes… Stay with me…"

"Leon…" Cloud almost inaudibly whispered, gripping the fabric of Leon's jacket with his right hand, his body tensing up with pain. "You…"

Leon shook his head, grabbing Cloud's hand in his. "Don't talk Cloud save your strength…" He whimpered, brushing back the stray blond hairs that hung in his beloved one's face. "Please…"

"You m-must know that…" Cloud whispered, though it was hard to understand now. "You're the only… one I… truly—" He took a shaky breath, letting a few tears roll down his face, "Truly loved…"

"You are not going to die, you hear me?" Leon spoke through gritted teeth, desperately wanting for them to get through this somehow. He turned his head back to Sephiroth, who was still standing there with hands on his head. "Call a fucking ambulance, what the hell are you waiting for!"

"Shut up! This is not what was supposed to happen! It wasn't meant to go this way!" The platinum haired man shouted, now moving to point the revolver back on Leon. "You've made everything go haywire! From the moment you came in, you fucked with his head and now—"

Leon watched how Sephiroth suddenly froze in his speech before collapsing on the ground. Riku was standing behind him, holding a large branch. He then stepped around him without giving him much care and kneeled next to Leon.

"Sora's calling for an ambulance. Try and keep him warm…" Riku whispered, taking control of the situation.

"How long will it take for the medics to get here?" Leon asked, removing his jacket now and covering Cloud with it. "He's lost a lot of blood."

"It shouldn't be too long now…" Riku answered, looking behind him to check on his brother who was still unconscious on the snowy ground. "Sick bastard." He then saw Sora running up to them from the house, carrying a warm blanket.

"I've called the police and an ambulance and they're on their way…" He said, not looking at Sephiroth on purpose and handing Riku the blanket to cover up Cloud who had passed out. "Is he going to be alright?"

"He took a bullet in the back to protect me…" Leon whispered sadly, caressing Cloud's face. "If he doesn't make it…"

"Don't think that way…" Sora comfortingly whispered, "He has to make it, I know he will."

The sound of sirens was then heard in the distance and all felt a small feeling of relief wash over them, a small bit of hope resurfacing.

Then, they heard low growling behind them and they turned to look behind Sora to find Trooper growling at Sephiroth who was starting to come to.

"What is he doing here?" Sora whispered in horror and wanted to stand to go get the dog, but Leon held him back.

"Riku, the gun!" Leon whispered but it was too late; Sephiroth had already sat himself up and spotted them.

"Enough fooling around." Sephiroth whispered between his teeth, standing now. "Hand him over to me, NOW!"

"Why don't you just go?" Sora whispered, "We already called the police."

"Why don't you just shut your mouth?" Sephiroth said angrily, pointing his gun on Sora's forehead. "Fucking hand him over, or I'll shoot him."

"Seph!" Riku cried out in horror at the position he was putting all of them in. "Have you lost your mind!"

"It's not worth it, Sephiroth!" Leon shouted.

The sirens of the police were sounding very close by now.

"5." Sephiroth then counted, his eyes still fixed on Sora. "Give Cloud to me. 4."

Sora gasped, tears rolling down his face as he was too afraid to even move. "Riku…" He whimpered in fright.

Trooper barked now, bearing his front teeth.

"3."

"Oh god…" Sora whispered, closing his eyes.

"Sephiroth please," Riku spoke gently, slowly moving himself to stand with his hands held up in front of him with his palms up. "Sora has nothing to do with this… just let him go. Cloud needs medical help; he'll die if you take him with you now."

"If you all had just minded your own business we wouldn't be here." Sephiroth coolly replied, still aiming at the brunet. "I'm taking him with me, whether you like it or not."

"If you take him away from the one person he loves more than anything and you kill me, how do you expect him to love you?" Sora whispered bravely, "How do you expect him to love a murderer!"

At that Sephiroth growled in anger and was about to shoot when Trooper bit him in his left calf. Taken by surprise, Sephiroth pulled the trigger firing the shot he had aimed at Sora.

Riku watched as in a slow movie how Sora hit the snowy ground face first and didn't move, the police and an ambulance stopping right in front of the scene, Sephiroth finding himself surrounded and unable to make another move with all the guns suddenly aimed at him.

"SORAAAAAAAAAA!"

The paramedics rushed to Leon and Cloud examinating them on the spot, the blue and red flashing lights illuminating the entire scene as in a surrealistic dream.

"NOOOOOOOOO!"

It was as if his scream stretched itself out for ever as he ran up to him, his vision becoming blurry and his feet moving slower and slower with every heart beat that stretched itself out into eternity as the seconds became entire hours filled with growing despair…

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Stay tuned for the epilogue…_

_**-BDP-**_


	12. Together in our wold alone

_Probably most of you guys out there know the news by now, I'm going to start a new story that follows up to this one. Therefore I changed the purpose of this chapter a bit and made it an Epilogue for** 'Aches of the heart'** and an Opening for the upcoming story **'Together in our world alone'**._

_I thank all of the readers and reviewers of this story and all Riku/Sora fans out there, without which I wouldn't have been able to find inspiration for this story. I thank all of you once more for letting me share my world with you guys; it's a pleasure each time!_

_Take care everyone and write on write on!_

_-**Balckdiamond Princess!**_

_

* * *

18 months have now passed._

_Riku has become the vice-CEO of his familial company after his brother got sentenced to 25 years of imprisonment for attempt to murder with premeditation and conspiracy to rape. _

_Cloud and Leon left Destiny City after the verdict, they moved to Xillion City on the vast land to pursue their individual careers._

_Kairi and Wakka still aren't married, but the preparations are coming along well. They decided that it would be best to wait for Kairi to finish her last year of college, which means that they'll probably be having it in September, two months from where this chapter will open._

_Roxas, now free of the grip his ex-boyfriend held on his life, moved to Destiny City to pursue his psychological studies there. He and Sora became particularly close over the months following the incidents in Crystle._

_Sora finished his literature and psychology studies and together with Riku he moved into a spacey house on the outskirts of DC. Though all seemed well in appearances, their relationship has met many wobbly moments and sadly, they haven't always been able to find a way to overcome those gloomy periods._

_Like now…_

_

* * *

_

Epilogue/ Opening: Together in our world alone

* * *

The moon was shining beautifully in the starless sky, its silver luminescence casting a trail of shimmering light on the surface of the tranquil sea. The soft sound of the waves rolling onto the beach in the distance and the soothing marine breeze were coming through the open window giving out on the veranda.

Taking a deep breath and resting with the front of his head against the glass surface of the window, he felt how arms came to encircle his waist and held him close to his lover's body.

"Come back to bed…" A loving kiss was caressed on the skin of his right shoulder, pushing aside the fabric of the shirt he was wearing.

He closed his eyes and moved his face to the tender touch, lifting his eyes to lock them with his. "Riku…"

"Is there something wrong?" Riku whispered back, brushing a brown lock behind Sora's left ear gently.

"No…" The brunet whispered, shaking his head and closing his eyes with a small smile as he received another kiss on his cheek. "Everything is perfect. I'm only missing you…"

"I'm missing you too. So much…" Riku held him closer and closed his eyes, breathing in the sweet scent of his skin.

"I love you."

The next moment Riku was holding but air in his arms and he sank to his knees, suddenly remembering the events that had happened before. Sora was not there with him and it all had been but a dream…

With a sigh he woke up, opening his eyes and sitting up in his bed with a sad expression on his face. Almost every night for the past two weeks he had had that same dream, making him feel morose every bright morning that had followed.

Trooper, the dog he had given Sora as a Christmas present over a year ago was lying at the end of the bed, giving him a tristful look.

"Good morning, boy." He said, producing a semi-cheerful smile, but the dog did not seem to get fooled. He whimpered in compassion with his owner, who sighed in defeat.

"I know…" He whispered, moving himself out of the large bed. "I miss him too…"

He put on his bathrobe and walked out of the room, Trooper following him close behind.

The park was nearly abandoned in the early hours of a Saturday morning, the paved road cleared of any other pet walkers or joggers like himself.

Trooper was running next to him, following his moderate tempo and knowing the route they usually took by heart now.

Riku smiled at the dog, his mind remembering the times they'd go for runs with Sora like this and almost always ending up with him carrying Sora up the stairs to their apartment. A chuckle escaped his lips and he slowed down in his running to come to a full stop a few meters farther, bent over and with his eyes closed. He heard Trooper bark ahead of him, standing next to a drinking fountain. He walked over to the dog and drank from the jet of water, feeling refreshed. "Thanks, Troop. Let's continue? I lost my focus for a second, but I'm okay now."

Trooper barked and ran ahead, and he quickly followed him to finish his morning jog.

His portable rang in the pocket of his sweater as he was now standing in front of the door of his house, ready to open it. He took it out, opening the device to bring it to his ear. "Hello, Riku here."

_"Baby?"_

"Sora?" He whispered and his heart beat went up in excitement. "Babe, is that you?"

_"Yeah… it's me…"_ Riku could feel tears in his eyes as he listened to his soft voice, taking a deep breath to steady himself so not to rush into the conversation.

"Are you alright?" He said, trying to keep himself calm as he now closed the door and made his way to the kitchen.

_"Yeah..." _

He could hear his soft chuckle on the other line and he felt like crying all over again. The past two weeks had been hell without him, he would definitely admit that and he wished he'd forgive him and come home.

_"I'm taking a jet in an hour, Riku. For DC-International Airport. I'm coming home."_

Riku took a deep breath in relief. "At what time will you land?" He asked suppressing a smile and his tears at the same time.

_"At 10.57 am."_

"Ok… I'll come and pick you up…" Riku whispered with his eyes closed, wanting to keep him on the phone for a while longer just so he'd be able to hear his voice. "I missed you…" He then said, hoping he sounded as sincere as he wanted to sound. "And I'm sorry…"

There was a slight hesitation on the other line and he could hear a soft sniffle and a sigh, signs that the pain still hadn't left him.

_"I missed you too Riku…"_ His voice was trembling, and Riku knew he was probably wiping away a few tears from his cheeks. _"But I'm coming home now and I can't wait to see you…"_

"Oh babe…" Riku bit his lower lip to prevent it from quivering. "I can't wait to see you either…"

_"I got to go… See you…"_

"See you soon."

_"Bye."_

"Bye, Sora." He waited for click on the other line and lowered his phone from his right ear, his eyes closed as he bit his lower lip, realising that he had been granted another chance with Sora.

His eyes then fell on the wall clock behind him, reading 8.06 am. He went to look for Trooper so he could give him something to eat, his heart free of the constant ache it had been enduring and his mind feeling less heavy with the idea that they were finally going to talk things out.

* * *

The arrival's hall was almost abandoned by the time he got there, having made sure that he wouldn't be late by leaving half an hour too early.

Yet, as he looked around the waiting area, he was surprised to see a familiar brown haired young man already waiting for him in one of the chairs.

Sora stood slowly as he spotted him, a small smile growing on his lips as they approached each other.

"You're early…" Riku whispered now that they stood face to face.

"Yeah…" Sora softly spoke back, a feeling of unease settling in between them as their eyes found it hard to meet. "Good thing you are too…"

Riku nodded courtly, wanting for him to look at him, but not knowing what to say to ease the growing awkwardness between them now. He looked down at the red rolling suitcase Sora was holding in his right hand and bent over to take it over from him. "Do you… Do you want to go?" He asked softly, closing his eyes as their hands met very briefly.

Sora suppressed a gasp at the small contact and retreated his hand to put it in his back pocket. "Uhm… yeah…" He whispered, letting go of the breath he had been holding in. "Thanks…"

Riku hated the distance that had built between them, but he had none other to blame than himself for this. It hadn't mattered how many times he had begged for forgiveness and implored Sora to come back home, the result had been that they had both suffered two never-ending weeks of loneliness and pain. He couldn't hide or lie that he loved Sora; so much that life without him was but a hollow and miserable existence.

They were finally standing in front of each other again and all the things that hadn't been told on that night two weeks ago needed to be said now. He had to make Sora understand once more that he couldn't live without him.

"Sora, listen, I—"

"Riku, I—"

They both smiled at each other before looking away again.

Sora sighed in slight disappointment and then looked at him. "You go first." He offered with a soft smile, rearranging the handbag he wore over his left shoulder.

"No, it's okay, what was it you wanted to say?" Riku whispered, giving him a gentle smile.

Sora hesitated for a moment and then closed his eyes. "Is this the way it's going to be now?" His voice died out a little and he opened his eyes again. "Is it going to hunt us for ever or what?" He whispered with a melancholic chuckle, feeling closer to tears than to laughter.

Riku clenched his fists at that and shook his head. He reached out to Sora and placed his free hand on the nape of his neck. "Fuck it."

Before Sora could even start to gasp in surprise, Riku had already pulled him to him and was pressing his lips against his, kissing him long and hard.

With the element of surprise now gone, Sora could feel his knees grow weak as Riku held him closer, his lip seemingly on fire and his stomach feeling like it was filled with butterflies.

Riku let go of the suitcase he was still holding with his right hand and moved it up to cup his face so he could deepen the kiss.

The first moan vibrated against his lips and Riku slid his lips away from Sora's mouth, dropping kisses along the way to his neck to burry his face in its crook with Sora's left shoulder as he now held him in a tight embrace.

"My love for you has never changed, Sora. I love you like on the first day I discovered my feelings for you and even more."

Sora sniffled, closing his eyes and returning the embrace. "Baby… I'm so sorry…"

"Let's get home." Riku whispered, kissing the soft skin of his neck. "Let's get back home." He smiled in relief as he felt Sora nod and reinforce his grip on him.

"I missed you so much." The brunet whispered as they were now walking towards the exit hip to hip.

"You have no idea how much I did as well." Riku squeezed Sora's hip briefly as he thought back of the dreams he had been having ever since he left and smiled contently knowing that this time Sora wasn't going to vanish. "No idea."

* * *

His eyes were fixed on the ceiling while his body shook with each ardent thrust Riku made in and out of him, his gasps and soft moans convincing him that pleasure was still what he was being procured.

Somehow, somewhere between their frantic make out session on their way up the stairs his body quit following the upbeat tempo of the flying clothing garments, the sensual touches and the deep kisses. It had missed the fire of their otherwise intense reunions, although now he could feel the heat of Riku's body against his and the passion behind the many caresses and gentle words, something else was missing.

Why didn't their lovemaking do something to him?

A worried expression grew on his face as he closed his eyes, his hands grabbing Riku's sides more desperately as the pace quickened. "Hnnnh...b-baby..." Even moaning came out as a mere automatism, and he realised that this hadn't been what he wanted. He didn't want to make love to Riku. Or at least, not right now...

"What's wrong?"

His eyes flew open and he was staring into Riku's deep, sea green orbs. "N-nothing..." He softly whispered with a smile, oppressing the trembling of his lips and the upcoming flow of tears. "Go deeper, Riku... P-please..."

"Baby, are you crying?" Riku questioned, stopping his movements and cupping Sora's face with his right hand.

Sora sniffled and shook his head, not wanting to give into what he was feeling. "Don't stop..." He whimpered, closing his eyes again and rolling his hips tentatively against his. Though this time, he couldn't hold back the sob that found its way passed his lips and the teardrop that rolled sideways his face. "Please don't stop..."

"Sora..." Riku was now completely dumbfounded as he watched him braking down in tears

"W-why... why did you stop?" Sora whimpered, opening his eyes to look up at him.

He gave him a non-understanding look. "Did I do something to upset you?" Riku asked worriedly. "Did I hurt you somehow?"

Sora turned his face to the side and closed his eyes, shaking his head. "No..."

"Then what's wrong?"

Not a word came out of Sora, who kept his eyes closed as he sobbed further, refusing to look at him.

"You still haven't forgiven me, have you?" Riku whispered, beginning to withdraw himself from him, a hurt look on his face.

"No! That's not it!" Sora whispered, looking at him now, biting his lower lip. The look in Riku's eyes broke his heart and more tears found their way down his cheeks.

"Then what?" Riku asked, almost desperately. "Talk to me."

He couldn't tell him, he just couldn't bring his heart to do it and as a result he simply turned his head to the side and closed his eyes.

"I thought so; you haven't forgiven me yet..." Riku now started to move himself off of Sora.

"Riku—" Sora whimpered, trying to hold on to him.

"No, Sora..."

"Baby, please…" Sora pleaded, holding on to him now and looking him in the eyes. "I just feel like we're going too fast… I thought I wanted this, because I had missed you so much, but I realised that I didn't… I just can't, it's too soon."

Riku didn't answer, his eyes trailing away from his as a disappointed look grew on his face. "I guess I can't hope for things to be the way they were before…"

"It's just too soon… I'm sorry…" Sora had closed his eyes again. "I really am."

"Yeah…" Riku chuckled melancholically. "Not as much as I am…"

He got out from underneath the sheets, grabbed his pillow and his bathrobe before leaving through the bedroom door.

"Oh god…" Placing the palms of his hands on his face, Sora rolled over to his side, crawling into a foetal position, feeling then more than ever that their relationship had hit rock bottom. He feared for what would happen next. He felt tired and helpless as he thought back of all the arguing they had done so far. He wanted to leave the past to what it was, but what was he to do now that he felt like he was starting to lose faith in the one and only person he had loved for all his life?

* * *

A small picture of Sora was standing on the small table in the living room. He had been staring at it for over an hour now from his position on the couch. Nothing seemed to be going right anymore.

And there was no one else to blame than himself.

Once again.

He remembered the last look Sora had given him right before leaving two weeks ago. He hadn't even said a word, not even a tear had rolled out of his eyes. He had simply stared at him with an expressionless face before walking out of the door of his office.

After he had caught on the floor and on top of his secretary, making out with her like he had never loved anyone else before.

Riku ran his hands through his hair deeply regretting that night.

Too much booze and oppressed sexual frustrations.

He shook his head though; it still did not explain why he let Lanelle seduce him that easily.

Granted, he and Sora had been arguing a lot more the weeks before, but it was mostly about the smaller things like food, Trooper or even the emplacement of their new flat screen television. Yet now that he thought about it, those had also contributed to the problems they had had in the bedroom, or rather _he_ had had in the bedroom with Sora…

Sora had refused to let him touch him for over a week because he had been mad about something Riku now didn't even remember.

He sighed, wondering what else it was he could do to make Sora love him the way he had before again.

"Riku?"

He sat up and looked behind the couch, finding Sora standing near the stairs in the hall, fully dressed and carrying a travelling bag over his left shoulder. "Sora…"

"This isn't going to work for me." Sora said, closing his eyes and facing away from him. "I'm not ready to do this again."

Riku couldn't even start thinking of a reply; he just stood there now; looking at him with his heart feeling like someone was stabbing it with a knife with each beat. A trembling smile formed on his lips though and he nodded, knowing he wouldn't be able to hold him back anyways. "Are you going back to DI?"

"I don't know…" Sora whispered, blinking his tears away and sniffling softly. "I think we need some time apart—I need some more time away from you."

Riku closed his eyes, keeping the tears away, and nodded with a brave smile. "I understand…" He then opened his eyes and placed his right hand on his mouth, shaking his head. "Or no… I actually don't understand." He confessed with a trembling voice, his eyes pleadingly looking at him now. "What am I doing wrong?"

Sora took a deep breath, to keep himself from sobbing, "It's not you. It's me; I'm not ready for all of this again."

Riku looked away to hide his now flowing tears and ran his right hand over his face. He knew what he meant; he knew it all still hurt too much. He now realised that by coming back, Sora had hoped to feel better about the situation, but now it seemed that it had only made things worse. He had done and he was still doing it.

He was hurting him again.

"I'll call you." Sora whispered, walking to the door and reaching for the knob.

Suddenly, Trooper, awakened by the voices of his owners, trotted inside the hall from the kitchen. He barked once as he saw Sora with his bag and then whimpered.

"Hey boy…" Sora whispered, kneeling down in front of him and petted him lovingly. "Oh, you've grown so big…"

"Take him with you… He really missed you before." Riku softly said.

Sora looked up at him briefly and then at the dog. "Let's go then." He stood again and took the leash hanging on a hook by the cloak closet next to the door. After having attached the pet to the leash he opened the door and ushered Trooper out before going through the door as well and closing it without another word.

Riku sat himself down on the wooden floor of the hall, his back resting against the archway leading into the living room as his watering eyes stared at the now closed door, left alone in his now empty house.

* * *

The talk show was nearing to its end and he felt himself become tired as he closed his psychology book, making sure his pencil still indicated the last viewed page. He stretched himself out in the large black chair he was sitting in and reached for the remote standing on the low table in front of him, turning off the TV.

His naked feet walked over the fluffy white carpet and crossed the living room towards the kitchen, just as he heard soft knocks on the door.

He checked his watch, reading half past eleven, wondering who it was that could be passing by at this late hour.

He opened the door and immediately recognised the brunette standing with his dog in the hall of his apartment building.

"Hey, Roxas…" Sora whispered with an uneasy smile.

"Sora! What are you doing here?" Roxas wondered.

"Can… can I come in?"

* * *

ToBeContinued…

_**-BDP-**_


End file.
